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Author
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Topic: When a 'relationship' seems crowded, how do you..
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Atlenta
unregistered
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posted November 21, 2007 10:09 PM
 
How do you determine which is meant to be and which isn't?Let's say there are 3 people in a potential relationship system, and one of them is supposed to back off (they are, right? 3's not a good number for relationships!) Assuming you have all 3 of their charts on hand, with one as the control chart (to be compared with the other 2), can you see who will be together and who won't? Are there definite aspects that point to this, or are they based on high percent conjectures? I have heard of the sun/moon aspect, where one partner's sun must aspect the other's moon Also the saturn - sun aspect, preferably counterbalance. What if both charts show considerable connections to the control chart? Which one will the control chart choose? IP: Logged |
CoralFrequency
Newflake Posts: 0
From:
Registered: Aug 2009
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posted November 21, 2007 10:26 PM
I don't think you can tell what a person feels deep down through synastry. That's because we all have free will.. Some people have very bad synastry but they are in love and make it work regardless.. and vice versa. Sun/Moon/Saturn do indicate long term bonds.. mainly when the aspects involved are trine/sextile/conjunction. Venus/Mars/Pluto aspects are more attractive/sexual.. but not necessarily long term. A mixture of both would be good. :edit: and Mercury is pretty important for friendship/good communication as well IP: Logged |
GeminiLover75
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posted November 21, 2007 10:45 PM
Wouldn't it depend on what the 'control' person is looking for at that time? eg they might be looking for a powerful sexual attraction, which maybe only one of the other people can provide. Or they might be at a time in their life when they're looking for someone to have long talks and cuddles with! I'd be interested to see all of the potential charts.  IP: Logged |
Atlenta
unregistered
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posted November 21, 2007 11:13 PM
Here are the synastry charts
What if the control person seems to be choosing, because they have been involved with both before in love?*edited Chart A has a similar concentration in an area, while chart B has intertwining angles..
is it possible to see which is stronger?
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bluegreyeyes
Newflake Posts: 15
From: New York
Registered: May 2009
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posted November 21, 2007 11:29 PM
the second i realize the other person is more invested than i am.which is usually a few dates in. i seriously suck. i neeedddd control, but i don't want it at all. i'm so messed up in relationships. typical aqua. ------------------
*Christina*
Aquarius SUN
Gemini MOON
Aries ASC IP: Logged |
MUSTANG
unregistered
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posted November 22, 2007 12:01 AM
Something that jumoped out at me was the TN's right on top of one another and the chirons right on top of one another(in chart A). That is pretty insane...I'd think there's quite a deep connection. IP: Logged |
CoralFrequency
Newflake Posts: 0
From:
Registered: Aug 2009
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posted November 22, 2007 12:06 AM
Chart A - These two people have a lot in common and they are pretty similar overall. There are no oppositions at all and only one square to the Moon.. but lots of conjunctions.
It looks like the Virgo Moon person (inner circle) understands every facet of the other individual's personality.. However the (outer circle) person, does not *get* or understand this Virgo Moon at all.. They don't understand the inner person very well emotionally. The relationship would work better for the outer person, while the inner person may feel like they are not validated enough emotionally.
That being said - there are a lot of other connections - so if the inner person doesn't mind that square.. and the Jupiter sextile compensates (which it might) it could work out fine. Chart B - These people have some major differences in view point and opinion. There is an attraction there.. but it would fizzle out quicker than Chart A imo.. This relationship would last about a year, maybe two.. Chart A could last a life time. If the Libra/Sag Moon person is looking for something very serious and very long term.. they’d probably prefer Chart A. If they are looking for attraction/infatuation.. some heated debates... something feistier.. they'd pick Chart B. Not everyone feels comfortable with TOO many similarities.. The Libra/Sag person may prefer a relationship with someone who is quite different to them. It really depends on what they are looking for. IP: Logged |
CoralFrequency
Newflake Posts: 0
From:
Registered: Aug 2009
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posted November 22, 2007 12:08 AM
Mustang, I think that's because they are born in the same year, days apart. It looks that way. IP: Logged |
Atlenta
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posted November 22, 2007 12:11 AM
Woah, thanks for your insightful comments, Coral! How did you get that from the chart?Yes, both are born just days apart, Mustang, there is a deep connection. (I need time to digest it here)
:edit: What you said about "knowing" their personality, and not being fulfilled emotionally is indeed spot on.
Actually virgo moon and sag moon are square, so both hardly understand each other - that's where a huge difference lies. IP: Logged |
MUSTANG
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posted November 22, 2007 12:26 AM
quote:
Mustang, I think that's because they are born in the same year, days apart. It looks that way.
Oh...duh! And here I thought that was a huge connection - I should've known, because those two planets move slowly. I am a novice, especially at synastry.
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Atlenta
unregistered
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posted November 22, 2007 12:33 AM
The connection is definately there though , which may be an indication by the nodesIP: Logged |
Geocosmic Valentine
Newflake Posts: 0
From: New York, NY
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted November 22, 2007 12:49 AM
The control person will not be able to choose. There is so much glue and Karma suggested in these charts, love and fear major power struggles, and volatile argumentative energy. Notice how the majority of the astrological action is focused in Libra and Libra is the sign of relationships and most Libra's have relationship karma to work out. My thought is that the two people involved with the control person will choose to walk away, painfully realizing that the control person cannot make a choice. Maybe the other Libra person will stay on, but the Aries person will at some point want to be Number 1. So maybe they won't both walk away, perhaps it's the Aries who will walk away. None of them will ever forget each other, that's for sure. IP: Logged |
Atlenta
unregistered
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posted November 22, 2007 01:10 AM
Actually, you know what?
If let's say these people were from the same class in the same batch, and do know other people born around their date of birth, why did nothing happen between them and those others?I'll give just a scenario:
Person A and B know at least 2 other people with birthdays in between theirs, same year. Does it confer the same connection too? Especially if a birthdate is closer to one of their's. Strangely, I know a classmate with my birthday, exact year, but we never got close. edit:
Geocosmic Valentine, how did you get the glue and karmic stuff? Is it from the libra planets alone? What if a generation has many libra planets.. do they mean the same? :edit: I liked your use of the word "painful", Geocosmic, it is a very apt word to use. You seem to understand it. Yes, painfully walk away - a likely scenario that's happened before. If it's a triangle it would be a huge mistake. IP: Logged |
SagSun
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posted November 22, 2007 03:38 AM
I'd say chart A looks more easy-going in the short run, but eventually the Libra Sun/Sag Moon person might get bored. Also I think the Virgo Moon of the inner circle person square the Sag Moon/Sag Mars of the outer circle person could be a huge issue (particularly for the Virgo Moon), especially since the Mars of the Virgo Moon person is also conjunct the Sag Moon/Sag Mars conjunction of the outer circle person. This one looks very explosive to me. Of course, the Node/Node conjunction is a very powerful connection to have in synastry. Chart B is the one with MUCH more intensity (Venus/Pluto double whammy ... I wouldn't underestimate the power of this one). The Aqua Venus of the inner circle person trines the stellium in Libra of the outer circle person, which adds a lot of romance to the relationship. The Sun of the inner circle person and the Moon of the outer circle person are trine by sign, though not by orb. Personally, however, I don't think it is imperative to have a Sun/Moon contact in synastry. I think ANY contact between one person's Moon and a personal planet of the other person will do. It doesn't always have to be a Sun/Moon contact. But that's just IMHO... Long story short, it really depends on what the Sag Moon person is looking for AND who of the other two persons is more willing to stick around and wait for the Sag Moon to make a decision. Personally, I feel that chart B looks more promising for a long-term relationship, because it has just the right amount of tension in it to keep things interesting. Also I think the Gemini Moon can handle those tensions better than a Virgo Moon could. IP: Logged |
Atlenta
unregistered
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posted November 22, 2007 09:17 AM
SagSun, thanks for your analysis!
Chart A have venus-pluto in the declinations though, so it could be double whammy as well.:edit: SagSun, I liked your references to explosiveness of emotions, and boredom.. do Sag moons really need stimulation so?
Also, that the air sun/ fire moon goes well with a fire sun/air moon.
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izodesmozina
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posted November 23, 2007 01:04 PM
Hi, Atlenta!  In my opinion, you can't tell from a birth chart. I think it's a soul thing and that the people destined to come together, will. I don't believe we meet anyone without purpose. These meetings are preordained at a soul level. This is why you can connect with one person and not with another having a close birthdate, even if their 2 charts are very similar. Just like you said:
quote:
If let's say these people were from the same class in the same batch, and do know other people born around their date of birth, why did nothing happen between them and those others?
I'll give just a scenario:
Person A and B know at least 2 other people with birthdays in between theirs, same year. Does it confer the same connection too? Especially if a birthdate is closer to one of their's.
.
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izodesmozina
unregistered
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posted November 23, 2007 01:05 PM
I used to think: what if I walk on the street and I could walk by my true soulmate without noticing? I now know this is not possible. Because if he is my true soulmate, oh... I will definitely recognize him and he will recognize me! And more than anything, the Universe will make us come together. Of course there will be people born on the same day, or close to him... I would also like to make some rational sense out of this. Why do we connect with some people, but not with others, that could be equally compatible? Only answer I can come up with is that we connect with those our soul decided to connect with.
I know Jane started a thread about this some time ago. I know Diandra also made a huge point when she told us how she introduced her bf to her twin sister [born 15 minutes apart] and it was very different from what he and she have.
*edited some personal stuff*IP: Logged |
izodesmozina
unregistered
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posted November 23, 2007 01:06 PM
Anyways, back to you  . Seems like you are the control person [didn;t know you're a Libra hehe. Nice! I love your Pisces Asc... crazy about it!] and you have some soul searching to do. I don't think astrology can provide you with a definitive answer, but I trust deep down you know. Trust your inner voice. This is not happening for nothing, it is a test. I know you will pass it and whatever you end up choosing, it will be the right choice. You are a wise young woman and you have a PIsces Asc! Trust me, you already know the answer!
Hugs and kisses to you! Glad to see you back here!
Best wishes, Izo PS: sorry i had to split my message, it didn't work otherwise IP: Logged |
Atlenta
unregistered
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posted November 23, 2007 03:28 PM
Izo <3 <3I'm not the control person..  I guess I'll quit being evasive.. the first chart is of me and my guy. He's with me, and not with my friend (we grew up together, so it's all the more complicated). As Geocosmic Valentine mentioned, an intricate web of karma, fear, love, power.. all rolled into one. I set up the chart due to a moment's impulse (epiphanic warning??) That she's sending him clear signals. But he's still with me, now. As Coral said, I know every facet of his personality.. except since his moon is square mine, sometimes I don't understand (or can't accept) them. to cut a long story short, I was thinking of wiping him of my consciousness but I know for more than a million years it would never happen. Because it's happened time and again and we're still together (by that I mean connected). I remember you mentioning the other time you would be seperated with your man for many years - I wanted to say the same thing. Well he's away at a different part of the world, and it would be for five years. I think it is necessary for the development of our 'relationship', or perhaps, see if a breakup is imminent. However, even though he's 15 hours away, whenever I talk to him I feel his presence closer than 15 people in the same room. It's that overwhelming. I know what you mean by trusting my inner voice. It's just I can't trust his, or my friend's. Basically if it is a yes to me, and he does another way I'll be disappointed. And trust me, he's a cheeky fellow, and loves to test me all the time. He has mars in my 12th house - he can wreck havoc to my unconscious, and frequently does. He actually knows my psyche very well, more than I know his - all that 8th house activity of just 'knowing'. I know he's my soulmate though - I have verified from many sources I trust and respect (basically I don't trust my intuition enough).. but I found out way too soon and it's not doing me good at all. I know majority astrologers have a fatalistic mindset - I have too. As in, I would like someone who wouldn't slip through my fingers, and if he did, I'd rather be the one giving him up first. I don't wish to settle for less, but I guess I can't hamper his free will. Though he has moon in Sagittarius, he has a very acute conjunction of saturn and sun/venus. And a filled saturnian house. He is very much like the jolly sagittarian moon, but I would say he is reserved (and very wise, as you mentioned ). Thank you for your advice, though. Funny, suddenly your name popped into my mind, was a few minutes ago before I came back to check this. P/S: I saw your earlier thread to me. Thanks! IP: Logged |
SagSun
unregistered
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posted November 23, 2007 04:05 PM
quote:
SagSun, I liked your references to explosiveness of emotions, and boredom.. do Sag moons really need stimulation so?
Well, I think a problem (if you can actually call it that) for everyone with strong Sagittarius influences is the fact that they get bored easily. It's hard for them to follow things through to the end and finish what they have started. Of course, strong earth placements or placements in fixed signs can balance things out. But in general I think Sags need a lot of stimulation, otherwise they'll get bored and lose interest. I think the nature of the planet shows where exactly they need stimulation ... Moon in Sagittarius needs emotional stimulation, Mercury in Sagittarius needs mental stimulation and so on. IP: Logged |
Atlenta
unregistered
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posted November 23, 2007 04:12 PM
SagSun, I do appreciate your viewpoint regarding chart B being more suitable, because I have felt at one time about this as well, else I wouldn't have asked this question.
Both of them are very good friends, and I'm sure they love each other. Thing is, there's a thin line between friendship and romantic love. I can't figure it out for him, but for me it's so. She's the strongest 'threat' to my relationship with him; I can feel it without it being mentioned.Furthermore, she has a sag ASC.
However, I do understand and appreciate the Sag mindset because I have sun, merc and venus in the 9th. Though I don't think it's as powerful as being in the sign itself, I need alot of freedom as well, and if he pushes commitment or forces me into something, I'd be the one to scamper and leave him hanging for a few days. I'm actually curious and interested (all feelings aside), how this would turn out. add: his moon is in sag in the 10th house - he alternates between being jovially emotionally-reckless, and being stone-cold reserved. With me, he exhibits more saturnian qualities. (I'm not sure he would mind me discussing his chart like this lol... guess I will have to delete all this later on) IP: Logged |
SagSun
unregistered
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posted November 23, 2007 06:57 PM
Atlenta,I didn't mean to discourage you. It was just a feeling I got from looking at both charts. But as you can see in this thread, different people will tell you different things as to which synastry looks more promising. All of us are basing our analysis on personal experiences, so neither one of us is more right than the others. And you're absolutely right, there's a difference between the love two friends feel for each other and the kind of love that lovers feel. But like they say in a song ... whatever will be will be. You just gotta have faith that everything will be fine!!! Wishing you the best of luck!!!  IP: Logged |
izodesmozina
unregistered
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posted November 25, 2007 05:51 AM
Hi, Atlenta!I am sorry for my assumption, I should have known you're the Cappy rising person [I also have this], and with that lovely Virgo Moon.
*edited* IP: Logged |
izodesmozina
unregistered
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posted November 25, 2007 05:53 AM
Every relationships has its challenges, but if there is the *connection*, and both of you felt it, you'll work them out. I don't think that Moon-Moon square is such a bit threat, I've seen that aspect in long-lasting couples.
I'd like to see some composites/Davison of you guys. Also, I found the dwads meaningful [ http://koti.mbnet.fi/neptunia/dwads.htm ], also numerology.
The synastry with the Aries chick is pretty good, too. Personally, I don't like that she activates all his water houses, it creates a strong emotional bond between them. However, his Libra stellium falls in her 11th house, and his Sagi planets fall in her 1st. It is hard to draw the line as to who feels what, the planet person or the house person. But there is something there  ... You said she is sending him signals - how does he respond? However, please keep in mind the fact that you and him are still together. Right now, you have the upper hand. Use your advantage wisely. IP: Logged |
izodesmozina
unregistered
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posted November 25, 2007 05:54 AM
Have you tried meditation?
I imagine this doesn't quite help you and I am sorry about that. I know what you are going through and it's not easy. But if you decide to fight for your relationship, please remember you have the advantage here. He is YOUR man and he is committed to YOU. I know it is hard to trust his or her intentions, but trust what you two share... trust that what you guys have is strong enough to get through this and become stronger after that. He is a wise fellow and he won't go astray, even if tempted. I want to try something, but I need your e-mail adress for that. If you feel uneasy posting it here, you can send it to me. I'll try to get back to you as soon as I can.
Take care, Atlenta and don't let the green monster get to you! Hugs and kisses! Izo IP: Logged | |
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