posted October 01, 2012 06:55 PM            

I am new here and this is my very first post. I've read around already and I've seen really great insights, comments, so I really hope some of you can help me out. I try to make the story as short as possible.

I met a Pisces guy. I work abroad in seasonal/summer job and he started to work at the same place from beginning of June. We have some an age difference, I am some years older than he is.

He is from outside a typical muscle/gym guy with a pretty face. I had prejudgements about that, so we haven't talked for weeks. Then in July he started to talk to me and we got into more serious conversations really fast.
I work evening shift, he works night shift, our work overlaps 1 hour. After a while I realized that in this 1 hour he stopped spending time with other workmates and only spends time with me.
We got to like our conversations so much that after a while I started to stay there after work for hours just talking.
He is really reserved and seemed to be a tough guy, like not opening up easily and also telling about himself that he is heartless etc. (He works at night in tourism so he sees a lot of terrible things and can't demostrate much emotions)

After a while, he started to get more easy-going and tell me stories about his childhood, his family, his life and his hopes and plans for the future. I live like half an hour walk from work and one of the first times I stayed there, he offered me to bring me home with his car. Since that he never ever allowed me to take a taxi or go by walk, he always brings me home.

I have a jealous exbf who works at the same company (luckily not at the same workplace) and he makes my life a living hell because of Pisces guy.
Pisces knows about it and though they know each other and got along well before, he told me if my ex ever touches me, he will have to face him.

First thing I realized in connection to getting closer to me was that he started to tease me and playfully hit me or push me around. Then he started to call me nicknames like: "tiny" or "silly".

I felt that he has to be handled with care and I can't just bluntly hit on him or anything, so I simply started to gradually make physical contact, like touching his shoulder while we talked.

Two weeks ago, when we were sitting next to each other looking at photos, he started to play with my hair and dragged it until my head ended up on his chest and he started to caress me head. This was his very first tender move towards me.

The next day he was messing with my head again and I grabbed his hand for a moment then I let it go. Then he grabbed after it and we started to hold hands, him caressing my arm, sitting in the dark terrace.

The following day my hand ended up in his again and then he started to massage my back and I ended up caressing his back for half an hour (all this without speaking to each other really).
This weekend he went so far when I put down my head on my leg for a moment that he started to caress my neck, then my back and going around for half an hour without stopping, after a while he was arm-deep in my t-shirt caressing my nacked back.
Since our work contracts will be over soon, I told him half jokingly: „What will I do without you?” And he told me first: „Well, what you have done before.” And then I didn’t respond and he just told me: „Silly…” and came and embraced me.

In front of all the workmates he behaves tough and really mature, only when we are alone he gets cosy and childlike with me. He puts his head on my shoulder or using baby-talk to me…

So I know that gradually we are getting close to each other, but honestly I have no idea what kind of relationship are we getting closer in… for me this is not friendship and though I had several male friends, none of them ever treated me like this.

My question is, what is in his mind/heart, what does he possibly want from me? I really like him a lot. He is really handsome and looks amazing, but I fell for him because of his personality and the way he treats me.
He knows I like his look, but also knows I would not spend time with him for that.

He does all these things and many more examples I won’t list here, but he never hitted on me or invited me for a date… so it completely confuses me. I think that workmates around us think that we are together. I think everyone thinks we have a thing going on, except of us. WE NEVER REALLY TALK ABOUT US.

I am really shy and very bad in topics like this, so I don’t bring it up, also cause I don’t wanna corner him.

I feel like a skizophrenic cause we ’pretend’ to be just friends, while when we are alone we hold hands and get really sensitive with each other.

It feels like there is a barrier between us that we can’t step over, while we communicate much more non-verbally with touches. Those silent times are filled with so much positive energy and care towards each other.

For further information, he is a Pisces with Gemini Asc, Aries Moon, Aquarius Mercury, Pisces Venus and Taurus Mars.

I am an Aqua, with Virgo Asc. and Moon, Aquarius Mercury, Capricorn Venus and Libra Mars.

posted October 02, 2012 05:23 PM            

I think it makes sense that he does not do much display of affection at work. Sounds professional. It's not really appropriate to bring your relationship to work and so I think it's wise that he is respecting that.

If he treats you well and is kind and loving toward you during your personal time, then I say relax, don't worry and count yourself lucky to have a dreamy, gentle Pisces man into you!

With an aries moon and taurus mars, I bet he is very direct and clear about his interest and affectionate too. That's great. Pisces men without that fire and earth would be slower to assert and define a relationship.

posted October 02, 2012 05:31 PM            

I didn't read your post yet. I just saw Pisces. Then scrolled to find his moon. I will see if I can add any insight once I get around to reading it. (Long text posts overwhelm me at first, they seem like a big commitment )

posted October 02, 2012 09:28 PM            

redshift>>

Yes, you are so right, me with double Virgo (Moon and Asc.) I wanna analyze his every move and my own feelings too! It makes me insane. Though I’m learning to switch it off and just go with the flow.

I’ve also read tons of Pisces guy stories since I fell into this situation and yes, I found a lot of similarities.
It is not simply that I can’t figure out how deep his feelings or interest goes, but rather that I can’t even figure out whether it is „just” friendship direction or something more. From his sensuality and special care towards me, I would think it is rather being into me than trying to build a friendship.
I agree on this whole thing not belonging into the work space. The problem is that here it is all about seasonal work and in season we work a lot. So basically both of us, we just work and sleep, hardly have time for anything else. So we haven’t met outside of work yet.

Well, according to my standards he is not very direct and clear, except if we say all what he does and how he behaves with me MEANS DIRECT AND CLEAR about his interest. Cause verbally… he never really flirted with me. He teases me about stuff, he says I am so innocent and he does say in front of me to others that I am a good girl. He always compliments about my inner qualities but not how I look. He never makes for example sexual jokes or teases, except if we are in company and other men hit on me, then he steps into the game too.

About the planets and signs I am really confused cause once I know that Pisces is not really fast moving and also that it is indesicive. Same indesiciveness goes for Gemini (his Asc.). Then about Aries Moon I read that they go for what they want straight, but about Taurus Mars I read that it is really taking its time… So no idea what is stronger in him, but while I see in his personal life, work that Aries Moon working (he has firm goals and he goes for them), I don’t see that for example in ’love’ life towards me.

Anyways, I will keep you updated. I see him again on Thursday, Friday, Saturday…

peachbeigeblue>>

Don’t worry, though I tried to make it as short as possible, I know it is a long story to read and consider. If/whenever you take the time to read it, thank you.

See, this is exactly how I feel about him too. Yes, I like him as a man, but I LOVE him as a person. Lot of times I thought about it to get into a relationship with him and then if things might go wrong, lose him as a friend, which would be a shame, cause he is amazing and caring and simply great.
It is just damn hard to try to draw the line at friendship, cause I am very very attracted to him… and I believe him to me too, hence we can’t stand not touching each other.
Lioness>>

I do wanna build the friendship with him, as a mentioned above, it is not easy, cause I constantly feel the urge to caress him, touch him, hug him and would love to kiss him (which did not happen yet).

posted October 23, 2012 01:54 PM            

So I decided to take a step back from him. I wasn't behaving negative or cold, just not that nice and cute as before.
It appearently got him confused and he did not even talk to me for a day, just drew back into a corner and behaved confused... Then when he was having a discussion with another workmate, I joined in with some words and from that on he was full on me again.

As I mentioned before we do seasonal work and the season is just about to end. The last 3 days we worked at the same place this summer was last week 3 nights in a row.

I did not initiate anything with him anymore, but HE DID with me. This never happened before. He didn't need "warming up" to me or anything. I sat down next to them (him and another work mate) while we were having a conversation and he instantly grabbed after my hand. And we pretty much spent the rest of the night like that.
This was on the first night...
The two other nights the workmate had day off, so we were completely alone. Each day the weather was bad so he picked me up on the way to work and then at the end of the shift (cause he finishes at 7am, me at 8am) he waited one extra hour just to be with me and then give me a lift home. I told him he could go home I'm gonna be alright, but he insisted that he wants to stay with me, since these are the last two days he can see me before we finish the season.

Both nights he initiated physical contact. He held my hand and then dragged me to himself and held me... of course no kiss still...

Then when he brought me home the last morning we had a really short goodbye, it was really uncomfortable.

I am from abroad and he knows I am going home in less than two weeks. He also knows that I am coming back already in winter to live here. I will be away 2 and a half months only.

He made several comments which indirectly indicate that he wants to see me once I am back.

I don't really know what to think. I feel insane, cause I don't get his behavior.

I don't understand how he can hold me and be with me like that constantly when we are together and then just let me go?

I would like to know how Pisces work in this sense. (I know you can't judge/describe a person according to his astrological sign, I'm just trying to get some ideas...)

I would like to know whether it is normal for a Pisces to behave like this and still feel only friendly towards another person.

And also if they let a person so close, do they hold that person in their hearts or do they just get on with their lives? Somehow I would like to know what I can expect once I am back in two and a half months...

Like is he waiting that I come back and will he be eager to see me?

I know that they (like generally water signs) need high security and big trust in a person before revealing emotions... so him not acting on his feelings... can it be that he wants to see that I really come back?

posted October 25, 2012 10:41 AM            

I tried to figure out, just from your story, what his placements were and this is how I did;

Well, I did devise that from the whole "gym" thing, his Ascendant would either be in Taurus/Cap /Leo or he would have a fixed sign moon or Mars there.

His Mars in Taurus gives him consistency with the whole gym thing: This is a good thing, since Pisces/Taurus/Libra can be legendary at the whole lethargic thing; so kudos to him for being a gym bunny and doing something productive with all that energy.

The whole "acting serious" reminded me of Cap Ascendant; especially when he said that he couldnˇ¦t have his emotions interfere. But alas, he has Sun in 10th house; so he has to act like an "Authority figure"¨ (Sun) in his Career (10th). Not bad. A lovely star for me :-)

You mentioned him being reserved but "relaxing" the minute you two began talking and I thought of a water Moon/Venus. I was betting on the moon in Pisces/Cancer (with all his talk of family and stuff) but alas, Venus is there (Pisces); that kind of through me a bit too coz I thought I had that one down.

The defensive approach he took towards your ex bf beef with you and him had me guessing a Moon/ Mars in Leo/Aries. They are quick to defend the "weak".And sure enough, his Moon in Aries was my stronger bet; especially when you mentioned how he'd playfully tease you or pull your hair.

It is like the fire moon to express their emotions in a macho/boyish way. Women with this placement are especially bitchy to someone they really fancy.

"We got to like our conversations so much that after a while I started to stay there after work for hours just talking"

Moon/Mercury in Air does that. And I see that his is in the 9th house. Yikes! That's a lot of talking. Lol

Yours is in its "natural" place. You find ease in conversing with your Mercury in 6th too, but you pay more attention to detail (how his mouth moves, how he touches you. I noticed that with all the notes you made and the;

"He does all these things and many more examples I wonˇ¦t list here"

For a man to make a move on the person he likes, there has to be an "agreement" between his personal planets cardinal placements.

If the man has no cardinal signs or his cardinal signs are Libra/Cancer- it may take a while longer for an assertive decision to be made. And furthermore, in the case of Libra, that decision may even be revisited with a "pros" and "cons" diagnosis.

I see that he has no cardinal force except a spunky Moon in Aries: This moon makes its decisions quite quickly and is quite earnest in what it wants (and clear). I'm guessing it's the Mars in Taurus that has him going over the details of his feelings with a tooth comb to be thorough.

Mars in Taurus (especially), wants to take its time and never wants to be rushed or feel pushed. He probably wants to familiarize himself with you a little bit more and entice you with his romantic flair (Pisces Venus).

But the square with Mercury in Aquarius is pushing him towards doing "something" and so, when these two are done squaring off each other in his internal walls, he'll suddenly do the unexpected. Either he'll ask you out or convert your relations to friendship. It's either one or the other unfortunately so be ready.

The conjunction between your Mercury and Sun suggests to me that you are rather fond of him. Aquarians tend to fall in love with the mind first before the physical. And the conjunction (by sign) he has with your Sun just adds to the attraction. But that is not all.

You are not exactly an open book yourself ,my dear, and only share what you are emotionally ready to share(Virgo) and so, he may be trying to read you too. Virgo moon is quite the mystery too.

Despite your inter-actions, you Moon-Venus trine in Virgo/Cap respectively suggest to me a very earthy person who has a firm grasp on their emotions and prefers a lover who is in control of theirs too.

He may try to control the exuberance of Aries around your cool Virgo lunar placement as well as the impossibly romantic Pisces Venus against your seemingly stoic Cap Venus.

Your Mars in Libra loves the idea of him, most profoundly. The mix of Venus/Sun in Pisces coupled with his good looks and athletic body does add a dash of sex appeal to your aesthetically stimulated sex drive.(Remember that Libra is Pisces 8th house placement of sexual attraction)

But do you realize that, even with the Asc in Air, the Piscean waters are deeeeeep? Can the cool Virgo moon handle the disorder that will surely come when Libra Mars rose-coloured glasses come off and you see your gorgeous Prince as the erratic Piscean Artist his soul ALWAYS was?

I think you should give this more time and allow for him to make the move. You don't always have to be "available" for him as I suspect this attraction is enhanced by proximity and the fact that you two work in the same environment.

But then again, if he is true to his Aries moon, you can just ask him how he feels about you. You are surely to get a very straight answer. But again, action on these feelings, will take time (Mars in Taurus/Mercury in Aquarius square by sign)

posted October 25, 2012 05:34 PM            

Wow, I am like shocked with all the information you wrote. It's the middle of the night here, so I just wanted to say a quick THANK YOU on your detailed and sincere insight/opinion. I will have to go through it thoroughly tomorrow and will sure comment on it. :-)

One short remark for your question around the end about me being sure whether I can handle his deep Piscean emotions and soul...
No, I am absolutely not sure and it is a push and pull for me too, but when he is around me and when he is so attentive with me... my barriers fall down and I give in...

posted October 27, 2012 06:39 PM            

I wanted to respond to your detailed description in a lenght.

Amazing how you managed to figure out his placements. Wow :-)

He is CRAZY for the gym. I mean it is like his religion. And I respect him even more for it, cause for 6 months it is season here and he works every night (sometimes 2 jobs), so he cannot go meanwhile to the gym... which means that in the 4th month he has lost 14 kgs of muscle already. Then when season is over, he starts gym again on a daily basis and gets back all he has lost and then it starts again. If you ask me, it is insane!

"It is like the fire moon to express their emotions in a macho/boyish way."

I could not agree more. He is such a mix of macho/boy. He just can't ever stop teasing or playing. He enjoys it, like it gives him a kick! When he stops is when his cuddling side comes out.

Would you say - according to his placements - that he is a kind of person who "cuddles"/is so physically sensitive with friends too? In all our relation that is the only thing that throws me off track... that the way he behaves in this sense... it just does not enter for me in a friendship at all.

"But the square with Mercury in Aquarius is pushing him towards doing "something" and so, when these two are done squaring off each other in his internal walls, he'll suddenly do the unexpected. Either he'll ask you out or convert your relations to friendship. It's either one or the other unfortunately so be ready."

You know, even if I am crazy for him, I am really mature in relationships. So honestly... this is what I am waiting for!
When 2-3 weeks ago, I got really emotionally fed up with his non-acting on it behavior, I stepped back. And I balanced myself out and kept a bit of distance. We talked and laughed but no physical contact.
I could have kept myself to that, cause I decided then that whatever it brings I don't want him out of my life... then let's be friends.
And then HE FULL ON INITIATED A 3 DAY LONG CUDDLING SESSION... and dragged me emotionally back into it...

So in case he could decide his direction and follow up on it, I could take that lead and act/arrange my feelings accordingly...
But it seems to me he has no idea... or I don't know. I find him a good person and I refuse to even consider that he is playing wih my feelings conciously.

Oh... I know I am not an open book either. It is just really hard to make a difference between how I KNOW HOW I FEEL and what I show / project on the other person from it... I am absolutely sure that I made it clear with actions and in indirect comments how I feel about him, BUT then again that is maybe only what I think...

posted November 01, 2012 03:19 AM            

Hmm, you could be right on the money here. This seems like an obsessive-compulsive disorder.

The more I look at his placements, the more insights I get; But generaly the interpretation of placements can be so damne broad!

Example: With Asc in Gemini , his Mars in Taurus sits in the 12th house. Now Mars in 12th is known for being a placement for suppressed anger or very vivid dreams(12th house rules the subconcious) and Mars is anger.

12th house is also where we do things in secret or keep things from being seen by the external world. The Mars herein could mean there is a lot of energy in feeding an addiction/past time. But he is likely to deny this addiction as it is buried in his subconcious(12th house).

It however, ties in nicely with his job: He makes money and sustains himself(Taurus) through working (Mars) in a "gaveyard" kinda environment(12th house).

I had a friend who had Mars in Pisces in the 2nd house and similar themes were apparent: he worked in a very demanding job (Mars) to sustain himself (2nd house) that completely isolated him from the world(Pisces).

He also has an addiction to cigarettes and smokes obsessively. But, again as with most things Pisces/12th house related, he denied it.

Are you sure that he is not on steroids or taking other drugs to enhance his appearance? A 12th house forceful Mars in "builder" Taurus , must not be taken lightly: There could be an already established addiction(12th) that he is feeding on a very regular and stringent basis (Mars).

This addiction is likely to fulfill his sense of self(Taurus): Self esteem, self-acceptance, self confidence and self-belief.

I am speculating ofcourse, but look into this(seriously) as his Sun-conjunction Venus with naive Pisces makes me uneasy as it repeats the 12th house themes.

Would you say - according to his placements - that he is a kind of person who "cuddles"/is so physically sensitive with friends too? In all our relation that is the only thing that throws me off track... that the way he behaves in this sense... it just does not enter for me in a friendship at all.

Well, the Asc in Gemini with Moon in Aries puts his Moon in the 11th house. His friends/ being part of a clique gives him emotional and status security(moon). But does that mean he gets warm and cuddly with them ? Not really.If he does, its likely not be something "conscious". It seems likely that there is some "macho" competitiveness with them too(Aries moon is a fiery moon after all)

I thought that his affection could actually come from the conjunction between Venus and the Sun. Again here, the inability to draw boundaries (water Pisces) with people you like/attracted to(Venus). Rememeber that Pisces energy tends to "give all" when aroused and have trouble containing themselves.

Mars in Taurus coupled with Sun-conjunction-Venus in Pisces (which can give a Libra/Taurus disposition) adds to this sensuality and liking to be massaged, rubbed, touched, carressed etc.

Let us not forget, however, that you also have a Mars in Libra in the sensual house of Taurus(2nd). So you also respond in a likewise manner. There is likely t be a lot of physical contact between you two.

But also note, the Mars/Taurus in 12th that I earlier mentioned, means that he is not really conscious of what he is doing most of the time.

I could have kept myself to that, cause I decided then that whatever it brings I don't want him out of my life... then let's be friends.
And then HE FULL ON INITIATED A 3 DAY LONG CUDDLING SESSION... and dragged me emotionally back into it...

Again, this is your Mars in 2nd house not being able to resist all that sensuality. Trust me, you need to establish some much needed boundaries here; unless you are happy in seeing this hazy "love" nest.(I assure you that your Venus/Moon in Eartn signs however, sure don't).

All this minute analyzing of your feelings and his responses must be time-consuming and exhausting(I'm sure your productive Venus/Moon in Earth are already complaining incessently and would love to put an end to all this).

Mars in Libra is usualy quick to make a decision, if it involves someone else; So ask yourself this, if this were to be someone else going through this situation. Would you advise them to continue or demand answers?

I am absolutely sure that I made it clear with actions and in indirect comments how I feel about him, BUT then again that is maybe only what I think...

That sentence in and of itself is a paradox.lol

I may have been mistaken about your moon because I missed to take note that it could very well be in the 1st house; making you feel like your feelings and emotions are all there for the world to see(leaving the Virgo energy frantically trying to conceal them coz Virgo energy is never comfortable with publicity).

The tense square between "protect your feelings and never let them see you sweat" Cap Venus with "lets talk about both sides of the story" Libra Mars is messing with you. Relax...breathe...don't allow for any more cuddling to take place between you too. Yes. Resist.

Stand firm and ask the questions that you are curious to find answers to and let the outcome play itself out. You have to be strong girl.

I have a Mars in Libra too and I know just how difficult it is to look at a situation in its finality.

posted November 05, 2012 02:46 PM            

Wow, again really detailed comments. :-)Thanks.

"…his Mars in Taurus sits in the 12th house. Now Mars in 12th is known for being a placement for suppressed anger or very vivid dreams(12th house rules the subconcious) and Mars is anger.
12th house is also where we do things in secret or keep things from being seen by the external world. The Mars herein could mean there is a lot of energy in feeding an addiction/past time. But he is likely to deny this addiction as it is buried in his subconcious(12th house)."

Suppressed anger, definitely. I experienced it, I mean he was not exactly agressive with me, but ocassionally it happened that he arrived on Thursday (first night of the week) and he was impossible to handle, beating me around and picking on me all the time… I did ask him once: „So what? Will it be like this every week, that you come on the first night like this and it takes me a day to get your normal again?” And he told me yes…
What I think is that he is a troubled person. I mean him being a Pisces which is in general considered a very emotional sign… his father is an ex soldier who always treated him strictly and he is the kind of person who said men don’t cry that is gay, men don’t hug cause that is gay etc… so he grew up in an environment like that.

So he has this outside attitude for the world like: „I am tough, I am not emotional, I don’t need care and hugs and all”… And then I came along and he became a cuddly person who loves to hold hands and the like… but meanwhile he still does not admit that he likes it, he just does it automatically – probably as you say – not consciously…

"I had a friend who had Mars in Pisces in the 2nd house and similar themes were apparent: he worked in a very demanding job (Mars) to sustain himself (2nd house) that completely isolated him from the world(Pisces)."

That is about right too. He works a lot during the season and his job is really demanding. Meanwhile only thing he does is work, eat and sleep, almost no social activity and he is really isolated… I also think he has intimacy issues…

"Are you sure that he is not on steroids or taking other drugs to enhance his appearance? This addiction is likely to fulfill his sense of self(Taurus): Self esteem, self-acceptance, self confidence and self-belief."

Yes, I am absolutely sure of that. Also cause he is very body-conscious and always complains that he hates that people who use steroids reach a much bigger success with muscles (looks) and he has a certain limit and then he can’t get bigger with simply gym, without steroids.

"I thought that his affection could actually come from the conjunction between Venus and the Sun. Again here, the inability to draw boundaries (water Pisces) with people you like/attracted to(Venus). Rememeber that Pisces energy tends to "give all" when aroused and have trouble containing themselves."

So he does it cause he can’t draw boundaries? So he does have feelings or at least feels attracted, just not enough to act on it, or something keeps him back…

"Let us not forget, however, that you also have a Mars in Libra in the sensual house of Taurus(2nd). So you also respond in a likewise manner. There is likely t be a lot of physical contact between you two."

Absolutely spot on. :-( It is like we both are more about communicating with each other without words. We can sit long time without one word just holding hands and stuff… then we go on like nothing was between us and this is what puts me into a skizo mindframe… :-(

"But also note, the Mars/Taurus in 12th that I earlier mentioned, means that he is not really conscious of what he is doing most of the time."

So what does that mean? That he instinctly (cause he is attracted/likes me) handles me like this, but then he goes home and does not even think of me, cause he does not „know” that he likes me? Then I don’t have too many chances with him …

"Trust me, you need to establish some much needed boundaries here; unless you are happy in seeing this hazy "love" nest.(I assure you that your Venus/Moon in Eartn signs however, sure don't)."

I know that I need boundaries and I did start stepping back but he just followed and then he just breaks the boundaries and I like him a lot, so I can’t push him away. The best thing would (have been) to just when he acts like this, ask him straight: what is going on between us? Or something like that… I just somehow don’t wanna corner him…and NO, I absolutely don’t like his hazy love! :-(

"I may have been mistaken about your moon because I missed to take note that it could very well be in the 1st house; making you feel like your feelings and emotions are all there for the world to see(leaving the Virgo energy frantically trying to conceal them coz Virgo energy is never comfortable with publicity)."

My Moon is Virgo and my Asc. too. I have no idea how to say in which house my Moon is…
The tense square between "protect your feelings and never let them see you sweat"
That is absolutely me! And I have no idea while I feel like that inside with this constant battle with myself, WHAT IS ACTUALLY THAT I PROJECT TO THE OUTSIDE WORLD???

"Relax...breathe...don't allow for any more cuddling to take place between you too. Yes. Resist. Stand firm and ask the questions that you are curious to find answers to and let the outcome play itself out. You have to be strong girl."

Well, right now there won’t be more cuddling, cause I came home to another country for 2 and a half months…so we won’t meet. He asked me to let him know once I am back and we should meet. But I have no idea whether to give it another try and see him or just let the whole thing be? This would be the first time we meet outside of work… I have no idea whether that would change his attitude or not. What do you think?

"As I said, put yourself in someone elses shoes that you genuinely care about. Would you encourage this back-and forth with someone they were interested in? "