posted March 06, 2005 04:06 PM         

I was in a school library studying, then I started staring off into space. Then I noticed someone staring at me out of the corner of my eye. I looked to see it was this old man with a long white beard, who resembled like a wizard or "wise man" from a movie ( I don't know if they look that way in real life). His eyes just pierced right through me, like he already knew me very well. Then I got this weird embarrased feeling and for a sec I was a little excited to think maybe he was my guru. But then he got up really fast and walked in my direction, and my heart starting pounding and I was so scared...then he acted like he was coming over to say hi to a child near me...then walked straight over to me. I was no longer under the impression he was my good guru...I still felt he was powerful and wise, but he gave me an extremely eery feeling. Then the side of my stomach started to hurt really bad and I woke up still feeling the pain. I was scared for like half and hour after waking up from it..I even had to turn my light on and open the window. I remember telling myself afterwards that if I ever do meet a guru, it would have to be a woman, so I wouldn't get scared like that

posted March 08, 2005 04:15 AM         

I have a couple of thoughts on this, but it'll have to wait until tomorrow ... I'm out of time tonight.

posted March 11, 2005 04:18 AM         

I would not yet give up the idea that the Wise Old Man was a manifestation of your "guru". They work in strange ways, you know. At the very least, he is a reflection of your own inner guru. The setting is certainly appropriate (school library), and I would say that your "guru" probably gave an important first lesson for you to "study". It might be summed up in the old phrase, "be careful what you wish for, you may get it".

You see, it is all about the fear you experienced, and the surprise. The stomach contains the energy center within which repressed material/energy resides, which is expressed through pain or problems in the abdominal area. I suppose that part of a guru's job is to help to clear the repressed energy, the blockage, else the student cannot progress. Evoking fear is one way of bringing awareness to the fact that there is something to overcome, as fear is an internal creation projected by us onto something external, caused by some past experience or situation. It is this past programming, in this case externalized as fear, which the guru guides one to overcome.

So, in order to grow, to advance, one must face fear because fear is self created and one must always face the Self ... sounds like a job for a guru! Does that make sense?

The Wise Old Man could also be signaling that you should be careful who you look to, because not everyone is as they appear. Just a word of caution from your subconscious.

posted March 18, 2005 02:12 AM         

Hmm that is interesting Ra, I feel like you are on to something there.
I don't know how you feel about Osho, but I decided to read a few of his books recently. In one of them he talks about a common dream that people who practice Zen have that depicts a wise and powerful Guru type of character as looking very dangerous when you look into his eyes, like almost like a murderer. Osho says that it does represent your need to face your fears and conditioning of false perceptions. Osho says it is supposed to be a manifestation of the Bodhiharma (sp?) I think your explanation resonates more with me because I felt this presence was more personal, but that may somehow tie in.
Well thanks for that very thoughful response, I am definitely going to give it some thought

posted March 18, 2005 03:29 AM         

The Book of Secrets is a work of art.