posted August 18, 2013 10:59 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Yanmorg:
I am a Scorpio female with my Mercury/Venus/ Jupiter/Pluto in Scorpio while also having my Sun conjunct Pluto, mercury conjunct Venus, mars conjunct Pluto, Saturn square Pluto. When I'm in a relationship, I always feel too clingy or emotionally dependent on the guy I'm with because I always attract the "unavailable" types. Every guy that I have been with has either had moon square or trine uranus, or Venus square or trine uranus. My moon square uranus craves freedom and I feel it, but that Scorpio possessiveness takes over after my feelings get involved and I start being clingy and overbearing, How can I balance this out? I love my freedom, but only when my feelings are light. Once I get attached, my moon square uranus aspect goes out the window. How can I keep my relationships healthy without running every guy out the door? I also have a Taurus Ascendant, moon in libra, and mars in Sagittarius. My Pluto and mars is opposite my ascendant as well. I also have a stellium in Scorpio in my 6th house and my mars is in my 7th house. I'm a series of contradictions.

---

It sounds like you have a very interesting chart! It would be easier if you could post your chart with the degrees showing. People that have internal contradictions are the ones that I relate to the most.

Now on to your question. You get to choose how you use the energies inherent in your chart. Because you ARE aware of the internal conflicts, you're in a better position to make good choices and not just "give in" to those energies if you recognize that this will make you unhappy in the long run. Ah, such important words -- in the long run. You need to try and find an internal balance before you can find balance in your relationships.

You're aware that you start to FEEL clingy and possessive, but that doesn't mean you have to BEHAVE clingy and possessive. I can certainly FEEL insecure, but that doesn't mean I need to ACT on my insecurities, know what I mean? I can choose to be "brave" or "rational" so as not to damage a relationship. And if you know your behavior can/does damage your relationships, that's excellent incentive to choose different behavior the next time.

As to the types you find yourself attracted to, that IS trickier! Some of it will mean making internal compromises -- trading some passion for stability or making a commitment to yourself to "write off" any man who isn't available for a relationship as "not for me". Why choose to put your emotional energy into someone who can't/won't be able to give you emotional satisfaction? But be forewarned that this isn't easy. Sometimes it even makes it worse. You find a guy who seems to be that "just right blend for me", he's unattached, supposedly wants a committed relationship, but you don't do it for him because you're not that "just right for me" blend according to HIS chart. Sigh. It's hard to NOT obsess about someone that seems "right" for you.

But with both your Sun and your Mars conjunct Pluto, your "type" is very obvious. You NEED someone who's just as intense and "Plutonic" as you are! You may need to ignore your Moon's desire to keep it "light" until you're attached. It SOUNDS like once you're attached, the Moon's desire for lightness gets disregarded anyway, so why not just skip that "light" step? Alternately, look to your Moon/Uranus midpoint and hope someone will put their luminary or personal planet there in a synastry. That MIGHT help, but I'm not sure about that and it's more limiting than just trying to find the balance within yourself.

BTW finding balances and integrating your chart should be easiER by the time you have your Saturn return if you haven't already experienced one.

posted August 19, 2013 01:37 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Yanmorg:
I have tried plenty of times to give up the passion for stability, but I always end up unhappy because it gets boring! Isn't there a guy that's just as passionate as intense as I am, but offers stability as well? I know that's damn near impossible, but I'm still very young so I'm sure these issues will get a little less complex as I get older and mature. Here's my chart. There's a ZOOM icon somewhere on the picture or page that will allow you to see the chart better. Thank you so much in advance and I appreciate your detailed reply as well.
http://s1324.photobucket.com/user/yanmorg/media/95ff4f40-e b40-48b6-ab08-cf610facb5bc_zps6ed2f70b.jpg.html?sort=3&o=1

---

I'll need to look at this tomorrow evening, since I need to get some sleep and have other things I'm committed to doing. But consider that you need to find ways to keep the stability "fresh" without damaging the relationship. That's the challenge for your Uranus -- just enough change to keep you from getting bored, but not so much or so radical that it ends up driving another person away. Now try and brainstorm ways that you can do that. What can you do to maintain your interest in someone who's intense yet stable? The more ideas you can generate, the better!