posted December 10, 2010 06:37 PM            

I was intimate with Gem... (ok putting head down in shame.. I know I KNOW)

I feel bad about it, I feel that it wasnt right.. I have no clue why I feel like this.... There was nothing wrong with the actual intimacy, I just feel bad about it now.. Sighhhhh... But whats weird I feel bad for him, not for me... very weird... I feel as if I wronged him...... Normally I would just be happy, and just play it by ear.. But now I feel bad.. I dont like this at all... What fun is this??
BUT I do feel I need to sooo take off... IDK its weird.. Its a different kind off take off...

Man I hope Saturn doesnt mess with me, its going to moving into my 8th next..
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I do have a "sort of joke" for guys..

What do two people with venus in cancer disagree about???
They disagree about who takes care of who... lol

posted December 10, 2010 08:54 PM            

Also, my energy was REALLY low, too...

posted December 10, 2010 09:36 PM            

"Saturn is at home in Taurus, perhaps too much at home! Taurus is the most solid earth sign, the sign of stubborness and rocklike stability (fixed earth). Saturn rules rigidity, old age, limits, morality, seriousness, conservatism, accomplishments, and structure. Saturn in Taurus is therefore the most stable matching of a planet and sign possible.

Taurus is the sign of material posessions, of personal "values", and of feelings. Wherever Saturn transits people feel they have problems, and must strive to "get it together" in that area. With Saturn in Taurus, people will feel monetarily challenged. They will feel they have to get their money "scene" together. Conversely, people will feel that those with money (the wealthy) have problems which must be addressed.

Because Taurus rules physical pleasure, Saturn in Taurus puts limits and restrictions on physical pleasure -- there is a tendency for stronger moralistic posturing during these periods. Everything from celibacy reaffirmed to the Mann Act on interstate prostitution.

Banks are a means to conserve and protect wealth -- Saturn in Tauus is an ideal time to found a bank. Wells Fargo, for example, was founded with Saturn in Taurus. Actually, nearly any heavy edifice would come under Saturn in Taurus.

Heavy tales, especially about buildings or ships, seem to happen with Saturn in Taurus (Howard's End, House of the Seven Gables, and Moby Dick). The Titanic sunk with Saturn in Taurus.

Taurus also governs the more physical arts (sculpture, pottery), singing (Taurus rules the throat), and art appreciation -- art buildings and many artistic careers started with Saturn in Taurus. "

8th House:

Saturn in the Eighth House: wants control. I call this one the "I tie you up, you tie me up" position. No, Saturn here does not deny sex. It just wants to plan and control it and is generally not spontaneous. Saturn here can cause difficulties and delays with credit matters and inheritances. Because of early problems in this area, those with Saturn in the eighth house are frequently sticklers about these things. If you have Saturn in the eighth house, you probably manage other people’s money better than you manage your own and are firm on social rules.

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I don't see it totally that way, maybe because of the fire in my chart and how Saturn opposes Jupiter in my 2nd house. I am great with my own money as well as with other people's money.

As far as sex... I need certain things. I need to care / love for someone. Sex is not some cheap itch that I need or have ever needed to scratch. Things turn me off in a heartbeat. Dirt, smells or people that are icky in their manner of speech will totally turn me off (when I was single). I am married to a man that makes my Saturn in the 8th happy.

I also have Saturn trine Sun, sextile Mars and a few other great aspects that help alleviate the control issues that happens when Saturn is in the 8th house.

posted December 11, 2010 11:42 AM            

Toss in a wee bit of technology......
Stimulating thoughts/images.......
LOL!
Nope...
Saturn has no effect!
~Sigh~
Though looking forward to a time when I will
not be a "self lover" only.

BearsArcher:

quote:

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As far as sex... I need certain things. I need to care / love for someone. Sex is not some cheap itch that I need or have ever needed to scratch. Things turn me off in a heartbeat. Dirt, smells or people that are icky in their manner of speech will totally turn me off

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posted December 11, 2010 01:11 PM            

I got natal Saturn in the 8th....

Never restricted sex or sexual partners..I've had a glamoures sex life most guys would be jealous of.

But, Saturn has restricted...you'll never believe it..

Orgasms and STD's

posted December 11, 2010 02:10 PM            

The act it's self wasnt bad... I just felt bad after wards... I was thinking because T. Saturn conjuncts my N. Uranus...

posted December 11, 2010 02:24 PM            

Really, its been a massive learning curves in terms of intimacy and learning how to be close to someone via your souls rather your genitals. Unfortunately, it took a married man (when this Venus Rx was transiting my 8th house) to show me that.

Bittersweet like a mofo.

I used my sexuality and my body to protect my heart and my soul. Didn't work.

A lot of it has to to with my sexuality as well, being used and abused sexually by men via whatever form it took in reality. Did the same to them, used and abused them back cos thats the only thing I was taught during my sexual development (virginity..raped. Not "held down in the bushes screaming in some alley way rape" but, I'm gonna manipulate you cos your underage, vulnerable and naive then "I'll f*ck the sh*t out of you so your physically and emotionally traumatised for life so your permanently numb and can't feel anything ever again" kinda rape. Grey rape...biggest silent killer, makes me think that most girls have been through "grey rape"...the kind you can't argue in court)

Glad to say I'm 25 and getting my sh*t together, mentally and self esteem wise.

Being a stripper taught me to operate from my higher self rather than my ego and external sources of pleasure, having an 2nd house Venus, I make my income and resources through men, either via marriage or the sex industry (NEVER got into prostitution but I've seen it, been offered it, etc etc)

Its all in my natal chart. I just finally grew into it now.

posted December 11, 2010 02:36 PM            

I have been fortunate never to have been molested, never to have had an STI (or std as they used to call it) but I have been through a rape and a loss of myself because if it.

Maybe it was Pluto in Virgo that sits on my ASC that has been my benefactor. Maybe it is the luck of being a Sag that has saved me... I don't know. What I do know is that for some reason I have someone watching over me and I have been saved from certain things but that doesn't mean I haven't been in the edge.

I wish the best for you Diablo. You have been through more than you should have ever gone through.

posted December 11, 2010 02:50 PM            

This question has nothing to do with the rape discussion.

My heart hurts for anyone who was molested or raped

Love you,always, dear Diablo

posted December 11, 2010 03:03 PM            

You are so wonderful in that you feel others pain and you care completely. What happened to me was so long ago (I was 17 and now I am almost 41.... next week YAY) that it is a part of who I am. It made me stronger. What he took away (the rapist) I got back in strength.

In this forum we have talked a lot about Pluto and I have to say that Pluto was my guardian. Pluto transforms and builds something beautiful out of something that has been destroyed. I carried the pain for so long, like my own personal Albatross, and I have been made better for it. But sometimes the pain rears its ugly head, as I am sure you know.

Sometimes I see myself as a Sag with a bent arrow, it still shoots straight but I have to aim high or else it won't reach the mark. LOL.. I have said more today than I have in my 8 years here... but my heart reaches out to you and maybe that is why I am being more open.

posted December 13, 2010 10:58 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by BearsArcher:
Diablo,

1. What happened to me was so long ago (I was 17 and now I am almost 41.... next week YAY) that it is a part of who I am. It made me stronger. What he took away (the rapist) I got back in strength.

2. In this forum we have talked a lot about Pluto and I have to say that Pluto was my guardian. Pluto transforms and builds something beautiful out of something that has been destroyed. I carried the pain for so long, like my own personal Albatross, and I have been made better for it. But sometimes the pain rears its ugly head, as I am sure you know.

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1.YES!! I refuse to be a victim or view myself as one. Having a Scopio Saturn and Pluto, I've always taken these experiences as something to learn from (saturn) and transcend (Pluto).

2.
Absolutely, in the form of being unable to form a true intimate connection with another person. Pluto in the 7th meant a lot of power struggles where I had to fight for myself and for what I believe in. Over the years its made me numb.
Saturn is a cold planet with icy rings, having it in the 8th..I can be quite cold sexually.

You are quite the evolved being yourself, BearsArcher xo

posted December 15, 2010 11:19 PM            

Diablo, I'm another Saturn in Scorpio in the 8th house here too I've had major troubles with intimacy ("into-me, I see"...LOL sorry had to insert that corny Love Guru joke) my whole life, not in terms of physical trauma, but my father walked away before I way born, and I had NO clue how to relate to men in any way. I had a 5 mile thick brick wall around my heart, with an armed guard shooting literal arrows of doubt and screaming danger warnings at anyone who even thought of getting close to me, trying to see beyond the surface "Ice Princess" look. Partly I was aware of the self-protective measures and partly, I just sobbed soul-crushed tears inside of frustration and isolation. It's literally taken 5 years with my now-fiance, and his Cancer-rising, Venus in Taurus stick-with-it attitude and deep loving support to get to the point where I can acknowledge my fears and banish them with internal lights, and speak my deep truth without worrying he would walk away, like everbody else did, and to get to the point where I habe stopped pushing him away with the most forceful verbal shoves imaginable (I've got Mercury in Virgo on my side).

On the other side of the coin, I take sex VERY seriously and I could never imagine having sex with someone I didn't have a soul-affinity and mental click with, even if they were drop dead gorgeous. I've only ever kissed or slept with one guy (my current partner) and in so many ways, I know it's the only way I've kept my heart safe...as safe as one can under the circumstances.

Wow, that was a boatload of honesty like I've never shared before...good topic!

posted December 16, 2010 02:27 PM            

quote:

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@ LEXX.... HILARIOUS!! ROFL

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BearsArcher:

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and LEXX... I love you

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