posted April 01, 2013 01:04 PM            

Ways to Say Eff You
By amiann | Published: April 1, 2013

I have a journey in healing that I never wanted. I did not want to go into a numbing depression as a young teen. I did not want to be numb until now, when I am coming out of it. Nonetheless, I am on a new rung of healing which is what brings me to my article.

If you interact in the world, at any level, you have a plethora of people trying to pull you down. The reasons could be varied from their own pain to outright jealousy to simple human nature . However, if you don’t learn to rise up and repel them, you are going to be road kill. Some people are so hard bitten that they do this too much. I knew someone who was a multi- multi millionaire. He did everything “right” as far as worldly success. He never let anyone take advantage of him, but his life was a failure . The key is balance but many people do not know how to stand up. This article is for them.

Sometimes, I laugh at myself at the MANY ways that a Gemini can say Eff you. We have a great sense of humor. That is one of our strongest points. However, everyone has to find his own kind of armor. Mine is my humor. I would love for people to write and tell me theirs.

Back to the subject. It took me decades and thousands of mistakes to realize that I was not imagining the many people trying to tear me down. I blamed myself for other people’s reactions to me. I am sure I am not alone in this. Abuse will do this to you. You have a learned helplessness. You lose your personal power. You become road kill, to make a simple analogy. Once a child is stripped of his personal power, he is going to have to struggle mightily to get it back. That is the struggle to which I am referring.

You have to have your own unique ways to say eff you. They cannot be violent, for a number of reasons. First, you will be thrown in jail. Second, they don’t work. The Bible does not tell us to be weak. It tells us to be meek. These are very different. Weak is road kill. Meek is humble. Humility is knowing one’s right size. If you are talented and talk about it, you are humble. Humility is knowing oneself. Authenticity is sharing oneself. Both are in short shrift in our society. Both are greatly appreciated by people.

If one has a PD( Personality Disorder), one has an out of size ego. The ego could be too small, which is usually the case. Sometimes, the ego is aggrandized. These are opposite sides of the same coin. They may look very different, but they are very much the same in that the ego is greatly out of balance. I do not think a person can help having s a PD. It is usually from abuse.

However, to the person who has a shriveled up ego, he needs to learn how to repel people who hurt him. That is the reason for this article, again. I hope to offer solutions. If you have read to the bottom of this article hoping for a solution, I hope you will not be disappointed when I go back to God. I only have my own journey to share and that is a journey with God at the core. People have helped me. I have had wonderful mentors and some have been from strange out of the way places. If that person is reading, he will know what I mean. God sends our mentors. When we get better, we mentor others. That is God’s economy. However, the mentors would not have worked if I did not have God at the core.

God gives a strength that the world cannot give. One will worship something, as we were made to worship something. If it is not God, it may be oneself. It may be riches. It may be beauty. It may be intellect. However, the only thing that will not leave you empty is God. If you worship money, you may have a wonderful life on this earth, but there will be an inner emptiness. I have many friends like this. I know many very successful people and good people, too. However, in all of them is an inner core which is confused and pained. This is simply the case because God is the only right puzzle piece to fill that void.

I am going to offer a solution which will disappoint many. I am sorry, in advance, for this but I wish there were a pill or an exercise or an easy way to learn to come out of abuse. If there were, I would have found it. The Bible shows us the way out of this, as well as the solutions for our other situations. The reason is that it’s owner created us. If you don’t know God, He knows you. He wants you to discover Him. He is calling you.

The Bible is called a seed in many of the parables. I have a garden and so the references make more sense. The seed has all it needs inherent in it. The soil may vary and hence the seed may not grow. The seed is the Bible and the soil is us. God uses simple agrarian metaphors. The Bible was meant for the average man, not the Biblical scholar. To apply this example to healing, if one takes the Bible and reads or listens by CD, one will bloom. It will happen. It is a natural law, just as the seed will blossom in the earth. The right soil is a humble heart who has come to the end of itself. Abuse will do that to you. You, usually, will hit a bottom. That bottom can be the bottom rung on the ladder to which you climb to the top. I hope you take this climb with me. Everything I write about, I have gone through or am going through. I think you know that.

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted April 02, 2013 08:00 AM            

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted April 02, 2013 08:01 AM            

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted April 02, 2013 08:02 AM            

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted April 03, 2013 02:13 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Ami Anne:
I found the most amazing series on Boundaries. I heard this man in person but the U tube series I found is better because I just heard him for a few hours. This is life changing stuff imo. He is a Christian, so his teaching has that basis, but anyone could benefit. You don't have to be a Christian. I will link it.

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Hi Ami Anne... I care about you, and all the things that happened in your past... so deeply sorry it was so intense and prolonged for you.... but finally, you're pulling through and up, and determined to bring the rest of us with you!

I've been very excited to see you rising up on the inside like this... Gal 2:20... dead with Christ but NOW, like Him, rising up out of life's grave and deep pit. It's an evolving process... ups and downs, losses and gains, but alive and growing. You're not 'stuck' anymore!

Ever hear the story about the donkey at the bottom of the well? About the people who kept dumping nothing but buckets of dirt on him?! The dust was suffocating to him, blinding, pummelling was unreal! Weights... He kept kicking, stomping. If he didn't protest so strongly, try to shake this all off, well it honestly could have buried him alive! Killed him...

Well! eventually, he was able to find that he could stay calmer, and step-up, and stand-upon those layers and layers of dumpings!! Soon the donkey had arisen out of that dark pit!... (and NOW, he's probably gonna go bite a chunk of their butts off, too?!! Hey! Even if they were trying to "rescue" him, I think they could have TOLD him what they were doing! No... they used 'unnecessary roughness' and it's a sin in itself -- Adds NO extra-healing to the benefits.. (Well, at least to me, that's the TOTALLY WRONG approach! and earns ZERO-mercy in my relational book!!

"Offenses may come, but Woe to him through whom the offense comes!'... Hey! Didn't even Jesus say that? (yes, it's a quote)

So, Ami Anne, I like your article... but I want to go bite that "preacher" in the butt...!! He's speaking to those children, and "infecting" them with his personal political biases!!! Soooo not-Jesus, to me. What a shame... For me, he's ruined a perfectly beautiful talk by being a 'downer' in his attitude on poor people... Very insulting! I stopped watching the url, entitled, "Session 1 (Boundaries) Chip Judd."

Jesus loved and had compassion on the poor... That preacher over-stepped boundaries... I hope there were not some poor students there in his audience! His hits on them could serve to cripple and weaken them. The children were a "captive" audience... without the power to walk out, or (I bet) not able to raise their hand to disagree! (I hope these rise up among the Blessed, with a strong philanthropic streak!)

Otherwise, very nice topic....

posted April 03, 2013 07:28 AM            

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal