posted December 25, 2023 03:27 PM            

Hi everyone, and Merry Xmas!! I’m gonna need a little help here because i’m too invested into this situation and I need an external eye! Thanks in advance ❤️
The first link is the synastry (I’m blue, he is red), the second one is our composite. I’m going to call him C.
Me and C have been friends since our first day at university. It was 8 years ago. We confided in everything, think about ‘When Harry met sally…’, because it was totally us.

Finally it happened in september, three months ago…. we are together now. We love each other, but… it happened right before I moved three hours away for my job, and now we see each other twice a month (it could have been worse). It is like a dream come true, except that we are both full of anxieties because we don’t want to spoil our bond. He’s very difficoult, a deep thinker and sometimes avoidant, while i’m totally anxious. We’ve always known our Flaws and witnessed each other ruin all our other relationships because our bond was too precious, but now it’s more difficult than it seemed.
We have a great time together, everything is Perfect but we both tend to overthink when we are apart.
What do you think about it??

posted February 11, 2024 10:17 AM            

The anxious-avoidant trap is REAL, but look on YouTube and you will find a few very good therapists who work on attachment styles. I really recommend Briana MacWilliam. You can make it work and get to a more secure place together. If he’s avoidant then long distance works well for him and not so well for you if you’re anxious. But these can be overcome.

As far as the synastry, interesting that you generationally share Saturn on the south node so you have it as a DW. Saturn rules relationship houses for both of you, so there may be ways in which you limit or restrict one another’s growth. Then both your moons are fixed, in opposite signs along the possession axis. Definitely lots to learn from one another in terms of developing security within yourselves first and then in the relationship. Overall the synastry looks quite nice, and your moon on his MC is significant. You might nurture his career or just make him feel better about his place in the world/his social status. In general it’s a mixture of good binding aspects and challenging ones that will make you grow. You have to look for the lesson in everything.

In the composite it seems your main lesson is learning to communicate with one another, and dealing with the short distance of your living situations. Interesting that you didn’t get together until right before you moved - that’s quite revealing and part of the lesson I think. The emphasis is on communication and balancing an equal exchange. You have Chiron in the 3rd as well, plus Sun conjunct Mercury, so it’s a strong theme - especially with the sun as the chart ruler. With Mars/Venus in the 12th I worry there is some repression or hiding of affection and pursuit. Is the relationship a secret in some way or from some people? With this conjunction opposing Uranus/Neptune in the 6th, it does seem there is some clouding/illusion and irrationality when it comes to practical matters impacting on your ability to be physically together. Like you, I have this generational Uranus/Neptune conjunction in the 7th and reading up on it has illuminated some of the tendencies that hold me back in love as well.