posted December 17, 2019 02:01 PM            

This is a post for my friend. She wants to see an outside perspective on why she may not have any luck when it comes to marriage.

She tries to be positive about it, but she always tells me how she longs for a romantic LT rs and never has luck being in one.

Any thoughts, please ?

posted December 17, 2019 02:41 PM            

I noticed Venus is also opposite Neptune, square the moon. So this person is probably too idealistic, doesn’t see their partners clearly (Neptune) so they choose the wrong ones, and also is prone to being chronically emotionally dissatisfied and not having their needs met in love (moon), it’s like they have to sacrifice either their love nature or their emotional nature in relationships because when they act out one, the other isn’t happy (moon square Venus). It’s an internal struggle.
Moon is in Aries, so this person is actually very independent, plus the aqua DSC makes them even more independent in relationships. They are also seeking someone who’s more detached, aloof and also values their freedom and independence. Shorter term or untraditional types of relationships with aqua DSC is very common.

posted December 17, 2019 03:16 PM            

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Originally posted by LunaIscariot:
Aquarius on the DSC (marriage/relationships etc.) is ruled by Saturn (delays, obstacles, restrictions, blockages etc.), that Saturn is also on the IC square to the DSC angle, so they are getting a double dose of Saturn energy/influence hitting their DSC axis.

I noticed Venus is also opposite Neptune, square the moon. So this person is probably too idealistic, doesn’t see their partners clearly (Neptune) so they choose the wrong ones, and also is prone to being chronically emotionally dissatisfied and not having their needs met in love (moon), it’s like they have to sacrifice either their love nature or their emotional nature in relationships because when they act out one, the other isn’t happy (moon square Venus). It’s an internal struggle.
Moon is in Aries, so this person is actually very independent, plus the aqua DSC makes them even more independent in relationships. They are also seeking someone who’s more detached, aloof and also values their freedom and independence. Shorter term or untraditional types of relationships with aqua DSC is very common.

This person also has a 12th stellium, Venus is in the 11th...
Honestly, a big reason why they haven’t found someone is because of their personality, they aren’t very relationship orientated or have the temperament that facilitates this easily. Relationships require compromise, sharing, merging your lives and also putting yourself out there and being vulnerable. This person is very private (moon in 8th, 12th stellium), independent (moon in Aries. aqua DSC, Venus in 11th), selfish, bossy, assertive, arrogant and combative, they have a temper (moon in Aries, sun conjunct mars and Leo stellium) basically this person has a very strong personality, who that isn’t going to want to compromise. Leo is stubborn as well and has a ton of pride. So I could see this person getting into conflicts or rubbing people the wrong way like their partners, and then not wanting to compromise or apologize etc. because of their prideful/stubborn nature (Leo/moon in 8th) or lack of self-awareness (12th stellium).
Then there’s the need for independence and alone time that will get in the way, their partners probably complain about this, and since they have aqua DSC they easily feel smothered and are turned off by any sort of neediness in relationships or feelings like they are restricted. They want freedom. To come and go as they please,
And then lastly, it’s the types of partners they’re attracting and are attracted to. They could also be going after emotionally unavailable types (aqua DSC), that’s something I see often, because they like unemotional, aloof, detached types. And these types of people are usually fiercely independent and won’t give them that commitment.

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Hello LunaIscariot! Thank you for replying to my thread.

She is, indeed, veryyy independent. Deep down, she's a very emotional person, but she never let it show. I tell her too often to let her guard down a bit, and go explore new places and meet new people, but I always felt like she was too scared of emotions. Although she desperately longs for them.

Everything you said is pretty spot on.

posted December 18, 2019 07:26 AM            

She has loads of time. I think women come into their prime in that decade.

posted December 18, 2019 12:44 PM            

I would say look for Jupiter transit to meet somebody and then Saturn transit to solidify it into comitted relationship.

So transiting Jupiter conjunct natal Neptune in 5th house and therefore in opposition to natal Venus and square natal Moon - that's happening right now because Jupiter is in 3-4 degrees Capricorn.

posted December 18, 2019 01:44 PM            

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Originally posted by LunaIscariot:
You’re welcome

I think her next best bet would be when transit Jupiter or transit Saturn hits her DSC and goes through her 7th house. That’s in around a year or two, both planets are in Capricorn right now,
Since she’s older and past 30 now, that Saturn ruled DSC is going to be much kinder to her than her 20’s were, she is more likely to meet someone now that she’s older than before, so in her case, time is actually her friend the more time goes by, the better as opposed to worse her chances are compared to most people in terms of finding someone. Tell her to stay optimistic, like Saturn would say “good things take time and are worth waiting for” 👍. Hopefully she’s learned valuable lessons (Saturn) about her past failed relationships and she’s ready to find a true match soon. Best of luck to her!

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posted December 18, 2019 02:03 PM            

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Originally posted by roseblue:
she is still so young early 30's right?

She has loads of time. I think women come into their prime in that decade.

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Exactly, esp after our Saturn Return (if we learn from it).

She comes from a different culture where women her age are already married and onto their second child. That's why it's harder for her to accept it or be optimistic about it.

I try to convince her sometimes that it's actually better to get married after you hit your 30s. Because you learn from life and know exactly what you want from a partner. Better than to marry young and end up miserable, just because society tolds you to marry young.

posted December 18, 2019 03:01 PM            

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Originally posted by CapriciousCapricorn:
I would focus more on Neptune being the coruler of her 7th house (Neptune intercepted there). She basically has Pisces/Neptune all over her love life. Pisces in 7th house, Neptune in 5th house plus Neptune being a part of T-square in her chart (Moon Venus Neptune). So she doesn't see partners for what they really are, a lot of disillusionment there or being taken advantage of.

I would say look for Jupiter transit to meet somebody and then Saturn transit to solidify it into comitted relationship.

So transiting Jupiter conjunct natal Neptune in 5th house and therefore in opposition to natal Venus and square natal Moon - that's happening right now because Jupiter is in 3-4 degrees Capricorn.

And transiting Saturn in 7th house (in 2023) trine her natal Venus and therefore sextile natal Neptune. Also Jupiter through same degrees in 7th house (in 2021), also will help.

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Hello CapriciousCapricorn,

Thank you for jumping into my thread!

Will keep an eye on Jupiter and Saturn transits as you said.

posted December 18, 2019 03:04 PM            

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Originally posted by Bismarck2:
Leo ASC usually have bad luck in marriage because of Uranus ruling their 7th house. I recommend she marries a scientist, or social worker of some sort. Aquarius represents certain jobs. She should marry someone in one of those jobs.

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Yuupp! I told her to volunteer so that she can meet someone in that circle. Because she has a lot of aquarius energy influencing her overall love aspects.

posted December 20, 2019 04:49 PM            

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Originally posted by Stoika7:
Hi itsmeyaz ! Just wanted to tell you that I am not ignoring this post of yours, and thanks for calling me too ! ❤️

But I have read what Lunal wrote here and my observations match almost exactly to what she pointed out and she saw even more than I could have said :-)

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Thank you Stoika

Don't worry about it, I didn't take it as you ignoring it.

posted December 20, 2019 11:38 PM            

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Originally posted by roseblue:
she is still so young early 30's right?

She has loads of time. I think women come into their prime in that decade.

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posted December 21, 2019 02:09 PM            

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Originally posted by manderin:
That depends on the society/environment the person is living in. There are some places where by the time a woman is 27 all the decent men around her are already married and all that's left in the male singles pool are now the aloholics, abusers, irresponsibles and other undesirables that were kicked to the curb. Where does she reside?

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Wow really?..I mean that seems a little extreme, there are always good men out there. I think that’s quite an alarmist way of looking at things and probably won’t help this friend in the topic feel better about being post 30 and looking for love.

posted December 21, 2019 03:17 PM            

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Originally posted by manderin:
That depends on the society/environment the person is living in. There are some places where by the time a woman is 27 all the decent men around her are already married and all that's left in the male singles pool are now the aloholics, abusers, irresponsibles and other undesirables that were kicked to the curb. Where does she reside?

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That's the thing. I mentioned it above.

She comes from a traditional background/culture. Where women in their 30s already have kids.
And as you said, all the men her age are already married. So she feels like the man she's supposed to meet and be with is already married... :/

It makes me feel sad for her.

posted December 21, 2019 03:23 PM            

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Originally posted by roseblue:
Wow really?..I mean that seems a little extreme, there are always good men out there. I think that’s quite an alarmist way of looking at things and probably won’t help this friend in the topic feel better about being post 30 and looking for love.

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It's the truth sadly.... It's what she's actually living and going through. Most men her age are married. So she thinks she'll stay single forever.

I suggested she travels to another country. I read that travel and living in a different country is beneficial for people with 12H stelliums. Their 12H energy starts acting like a 1H. But I'm not sure if it's true or not.

posted December 21, 2019 06:55 PM            

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Originally posted by itsmeyaz:
That's the thing. I mentioned it above.

She comes from a traditional background/culture. Where women in their 30s already have kids.
And as you said, all the men her age are already married. So she feels like the man she's supposed to meet and be with is already married... :/

It makes me feel sad for her.

I understand why she feels the way she feels. It's a sensitive topic on its own, then you add society pressure to it. It becomes quite depressing, I imagine.

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Yes I was only not sure where she was coming from because having a family of traditional culture is not the same as living a place where the numbers don't help her. I had a friend who's family was from the Philappines so she was enourmously depressed with the fact that her family was calling her an "old maid" at the decrepit age of 26. But the family had been living in the UK since years before her birth. So despite the fact that the culture where she was living didn't have those expectations her own family did and she let her family dictate whether she was old or not rather than looking at where she was living - a place where people tend to marry later and therefore had plenty of good single guys available. It was her mind that was the problem.

But since you say your friend is actually LIVING in a place where the numbers don't favor her then it's not just all in her mind. (though her worrying might make it worse).

posted December 21, 2019 06:58 PM            

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Originally posted by itsmeyaz:

I suggested she travels to another country. ??

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posted December 21, 2019 11:50 PM            

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Originally posted by itsmeyaz:
She's aware that it's difficult, but I just hope she doesn't think it's impossible. I don't know if her chart shows her getting married is not an option ??

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Don't deny anyone of marriage. If she so seeks it, let her find it. She'll feel very depressed if you tell her she's destined to a lonely single life, and I don't even believe in such thing. Also, I don't believe marriage is a be-all, end-all. Ask the divorcees. I've seen couples who're just together (not married) and they're happy. I've also seen married couples who have been together for decades in misery. My aunt is one good example.

I understand how your friend feels as I also live in a culture where people look at you weird if you're not married by 30s. I'm 44yo and I've never been married. I've become numbed to all sorts of questions and "concerned looks" from my relatives. More than anything, it's irritating.

I also know a lot of friends who married young and then divorced and regretted marrying young. In the culture where I'm in, people move on from divorces very slowly and with great difficulty so it can really damage a person. So don't marry too young is the advice given by most of my friends, especially the divorced ones.

But sadly, we're still living in an age where marriages happen in our 20s and by 30s we should all be settled with kids. And also unfortunately, 20s is a woman's prime to have kids. Still, we don't have to follow the traditional path. I've a friend who had her first child at 45yo. I also have a friend who only married at 42yo and to a divorcee. When they first met he was still married so they stayed friends. A few yrs later he divorced and they started dating. So things can happen in unexpected ways. I've yet another ex-colleague who only married at 50yo. And these are couples who are happy.

posted December 22, 2019 12:03 PM            

So tell your friend, good things come to those who wait. 👍 Meanwhile, work on her own mentality, attributes and wellbeing. [/QUOTE

Great Post. I had two astrologers tell me in my mid 30's that my chart indicated I would never marry and that if I did find someone to make sure I looked at his chart well because my chart indicated to them that if I did marry it would probably be to a man that didn't show his true self until after the marriage and it wouldn't be a good one.

posted December 22, 2019 11:05 PM            

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Originally posted by manderin:
Great Post. I had two astrologers tell me in my mid 30's that my chart indicated I would never marry and that if I did find someone to make sure I looked at his chart well because my chart indicated to them that if I did marry it would probably be to a man that didn't show his true self until after the marriage and it wouldn't be a good one.

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And from where did they see this in your chart?

I've Neptune in my 7H and all the interpretations say I don't see my partner as who they are or I'll get deceived, or my partnerships tend to dissolve, etc... it's like I'm doomed to a life of failed relationships. It really scared me but when I reflected on the past, I realised that it's not that I couldn't see the truth, it's that I refused to face it, to discuss the issues and/or make a decisive action to end it. That explains why my partnerships always dissolve on its own. So what I'm trying to say is a lot of issues are perpetuated by us and we have the power to change it.

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I befriended several single women my age to live with as roommates so that we didn't have to worry about lonliness and save on housing costs. We all still go on dates and hope we'll find someone, but if we don't we at least don't have to worry about going back to an empty house anytime soon. Having no marriage is way better than being in a bad one. And once you're ok with the possibility of never getting married, the right person is more likely to come along anyway.

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