posted March 29, 2015 04:12 PM            

Honestly, I don't know what to do with this relationship. And I'd like to know what you see here.

posted March 30, 2015 12:12 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by appleberry:
First meeting charts only speak of about the first 3 months. You're already 10 months in, so everything it will tell has already passed. I think the only options are composite and synastry, or delving more deeply into his own natal chart, with transits and progressions.

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posted March 30, 2015 05:06 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by appleberry:
First meeting charts only speak of about the first 3 months. You're already 10 months in, so everything it will tell has already passed. I think the only options are composite and synastry, or delving more deeply into his own natal chart, with transits and progressions.

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Ah. Interesting. I know that for horary. But I've heard people say the whole gist of the relationship is in the FMC.

But OK. Thanks. I've already looked at those too. They aren't telling me what I need to know! I really don't know what to do with this relationship!! Argh!

posted March 30, 2015 06:19 PM            

For horary, I think you could ask questions like:

Can I do something to improve my relationship with "X" ?

When will our relationship improve/get better?

Or, some other question that directly reflects the distress you are feeling...

posted March 31, 2015 04:22 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by appleberry:
Maybe post your synastry chart in the Personal Readings section and see if anyone can help you, at least to point out aspects worth investigating. Or, talk about your relationship difficulties in the Interpersonal section and ask what aspects in a synastry or composite chart to look for that might shed light on the situation. Ultimately, you want to know whether the relationship is worth continuing or what you can do to solve he problems with the relationship. If you had a specific question for horary, maybe there's help there, but otherwise the other sections might serve you better in this case.

For horary, I think you could ask questions like:

Can I do something to improve my relationship with "X" ?

When will our relationship improve/get better?

Or, some other question that directly reflects the distress you are feeling...

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Thanks for your reply.

I probably just want to vent a bit! lol.

Deep down, I know the answer. I just don't like it!

posted March 31, 2015 04:54 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by LucieLemonade:

Deep down, I know the answer. I just don't like it!

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posted April 01, 2015 01:46 PM            

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Originally posted by babybull82:
I may have to disagree with that 3month thing...I have one chart in particular where it pretty much played out how the relationship would end for the whole duration (7yrs). Something that I like to do is use the degrees of an aspect as a time unit (following the rules of whether the faster planet is angular/succeedent/cadent) and so far it's been accurate in a few of my charts.

Also just to throw this out there, I like to look & see if the 1st/7th house are aspecting. In my case if they don't that means no (formal) relationship. If they don't you look to see what houses are applying to each other to determine what type of relationship it will be. So for instance look to see what houses the 7th house ruler is aspecting. So say you have the 5th house applying to the 11th, it may be only a sexual friendship. I'm not saying this works all of the time, but I like to experiment with things & so far they've worked.

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well, yes. In fact this is also what I had heard. I'm way to close to this so I can't see clearly. Plus I'm not great with event charts at all.

I'll have another look. But if you see anything. I'd be happy to hear.

posted April 01, 2015 04:32 PM            

The reality of Event Charts is that they are transient. They work like transits, though some transits may be longer lasting, and if the longer lasting transits are the dominant themes, the chart itself may feel like it's telling the whole story of the relationship.

posted April 01, 2015 05:33 PM            

I see that 1st/7th do not aspect..BUT the 7th house ruler does aspect the 8th house. So would it be wrong of me to assume that this isn't a "formal" relationship or commitment? Also I like to believe that the ascendant represents (you) while the dsc represents the other person. Not sure if it works with all planets, but it works really well if they are Mars and Venus. I like to look at if the moon is aspecting pluto if it's a square/opposition you know it will be a hard break up, but seeing as yours is a sextile I don't think it will be bad IF you guys did.

Now as far as time is concerned I'd say with the moon (8th house) and mercury (7th house) square at 6 degrees while moon is in a mutable/cadent house this situation COULD end after 6 yrs. I know that sounds crazy but I've got a chart where the moon opposed pluto at 7 degrees in a mutable/cadent house and it did in fact break up after 7 yrs. I'm not saying this is 100 percent accurate but I think this will just give you an idea of the maximum amount of time it will take for things to play out.

And of course with the obvious things like Venus conjuncting Uranus and the moon conjuncting chiron, this relationship or situation will probably not be a walk in the park, for you especially. Venus in Aries at 22 degrees probably isn't a good sign either as a planet at 22 degrees is considered bad in a prediction or chart like this.

posted April 03, 2015 05:06 PM            

Thanks appleberry for your reply. I'm not dismissing what you are saying! really I'm not.

I have looked at his natal, the synastry, the composite and I know what the issues are. That's not what I was looking for in this thread. I wanted to know about the relationship itself. I don't know if you know what i mean b that! Like, if you looked at the chart and said "I see this as a 10 month thing" I could be like. "Ok, check! I can put this baby to rest now". Do you see what I mean?

quote:

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Originally posted by babybull82:
Ok, my observations (and this is only according to my own weird experimentation) The fact the moon is cadent means that events will transpire a lot slower than if it were angular. It's also mutable,.so the outcome may take years to play out. Another thing too is this will probably be a significant relationship because one of the angle's rulers are in an angular house (Mercury).

I see that 1st/7th do not aspect..BUT the 7th house ruler does aspect the 8th house. So would it be wrong of me to assume that this isn't a "formal" relationship or commitment? Also I like to believe that the ascendant represents (you) while the dsc represents the other person. Not sure if it works with all planets, but it works really well if they are Mars and Venus. I like to look at if the moon is aspecting pluto if it's a square/opposition you know it will be a hard break up, but seeing as yours is a sextile I don't think it will be bad IF you guys did.

Now as far as time is concerned I'd say with the moon (8th house) and mercury (7th house) square at 6 degrees while moon is in a mutable/cadent house this situation COULD end after 6 yrs. I know that sounds crazy but I've got a chart where the moon opposed pluto at 7 degrees in a mutable/cadent house and it did in fact break up after 7 yrs. I'm not saying this is 100 percent accurate but I think this will just give you an idea of the maximum amount of time it will take for things to play out.

And of course with the obvious things like Venus conjuncting Uranus and the moon conjuncting chiron, this relationship or situation will probably not be a walk in the park, for you especially. Venus in Aries at 22 degrees probably isn't a good sign either as a planet at 22 degrees is considered bad in a prediction or chart like this.

One more weird question is this relationship long distance?

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Thank you babybull for your reply as well! This was a bit more what I was looking for and what you say really does resonate.

We were in a formal committed relationship. At least it was formal and committed between the two of us. For various reasons and complications we were not able to be all that open about our relationship to that outside world. At least not in his world and we are on the same online community (not here! ) and have kept it on the down low there too.

His situation is really very complicated related to drama in his family with his brother and his mother's failing health as well as a very nasty divorce and battle for child custody.

And yes, as you say things have been moving and changing, but slowly. Much slower than we both had hoped. Last year we were really quite optimistic that things would be further along that they are.

The problem is that I really really really like him so very much. We are currently "on a break". And yes, although as you say this separation was "easy" (ie, drama free), I miss him like crazy. But I'm of two minds about what to do next.

I can totally see this relationship being on and off for several years. However, I'm not 100% sure I want that. Isn't it just better to cut our losses than to keep trying when ultimately we can never be what the other wants/needs?

And yes, it is long distance. Well, he lives 2 hours drive from me. That doesn't make it easier because when we do see each other we try to put the complicated issues aside and just enjoy each other's company. That means all the issues get pushed aside and never really addressed.

We will see each other again only in May and since our decision to "take a break", we've been talking less and less. On the one hand I really miss him. I like him very much. He's amazing in so many ways. I just don't know if I want to keep dealing with the drama that is his life. His personality (and chart) indicate that drama will follow him. Plus the distance. It's not likely that either of will move any time soon, even if it is only 2 hrs away.

posted April 04, 2015 03:16 AM            

Out of curiosity, where do you see the long distance thing?

Saturn in the 12th is interesting.

We have a great intellectual connection. I love talking to him about everything. We love talking about everything.

posted April 04, 2015 02:49 PM            

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Originally posted by LucieLemonade:
No. You were not that far off at all.

Out of curiosity, where do you see the long distance thing?

Saturn in the 12th is interesting.

We have a great intellectual connection. I love talking to him about everything. We love talking about everything.

Sometimes I wish we had just been friends. He's really very sexy though. SO hard to resist. :P

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Oh dang ok, I didn't even notice Saturn in the 12th! I've found with Saturn in the 12th (especially in the composite chart) you'll know the person for a long time as well.

As far as how I guessed it was long distance, this doesn't work all of the time, but I look to see what house the sun rules and see what houses it aspects most notably if the 1st, 5th, 7th or 11th are aspected. For the most part the sun is the essence of the relationship, where it's going and/or its purpose and in some cases it shows how it got started. So in your case I looked to see if any of those 4 houses mentioned above were aspecting the sun and sure enough at least two of them were. 9th house rules long distances (the two hours away) and internet (the online forum you guys are apart of).

posted April 05, 2015 04:43 AM            

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I'd say if you can handle it just be a friend to him for now and be there for him through whatever he needs to work through. Don't totally close the door to possibly trying again later on down the line when things calm down for him. But also make it clear that you aren't going to be just waiting around either. [/B]

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And this reply was great! I did start to realize through writing this thread that I haven't really been all that supportive of him and his issues. Mostly I guess because we are not "just friends" and it impacts of our relationship, when it shouldn't.

I should really be a friend to him. He needs support during this time. So, you are right. I will reach out to him about this.

I <3 you guys!!

posted April 05, 2015 06:21 AM            

I was thinking about what you said about the sun. It's in the 6th. He was 45 minutes late to our first meeting. Had he been on time the sun would have been in the 7th.

Part of what drives me crazy about him (and of course I try to be tolerant of this) is that he is ALWAYS late. He just can't organize his time. lol. Funny this astrology thing!