Author
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Topic: Being A Mom..
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lovely* Knowflake Posts: 2141 From: CA Registered: Jul 2003
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posted April 19, 2007 01:40 PM
I wanted to share this email I rec'd from a mom friend of mine. ==================================== Being A Mom >> >> We are sitting at lunch one day when my daughter >> casually mentions that she and her husband are thinking of >> "starting a family." >> >> "We're taking a survey," she says half-joking. >> >> "Do you think I should have a baby?" >> >> "It will change your life," I say, carefully >> keeping my tone neutral. >> >> "I know," she says, "no more sleeping in on >> weekends, no more spontaneous vacations." >> >> But that is not what I meant at all. >> >> I look at my daughter, trying to decide what to >> tell her. >> >> I want her to know what she will never learn in >> childbirth classes. >> >> I want to tell her that the physical wounds of >> child bearing will heal, but becoming a mother will leave her with an >> emotional wound so raw that she will forever be vulnerable. >> >> I consider warning her that she will never again >> read a newspaper without asking, "What if that had been MY child?" That >> every plane crash, every house fire will haunt her. That when she sees >> pictures of starving children, she will wonder if anything could be >> worse than watching your child die. >> >> I look at her carefully manicured nails and >> stylish suit and think that no matter how >> sophisticated she is, becoming a mother will reduce her to the primitive >> level of a bear protecting her cub. >> >> That an urgent call of "Mom!" will cause her to >> drop a soufflé or her best crystal >> without a moment's hesitation. >> >> I feel that I should warn her that no matter how >> many years she has invested in her career, she will be professionally >> derailed by motherhood. >> >> She might arrange for child care, but one day she >> will be going into an important business meeting and she will think of >> her baby's sweet smell. She will have to use every ounce of discipline >> to keep from running home, just to make sure her baby is all right. >> >> I want my daughter to know that every day >> decisions will no longer be routine. >> >> That a five year old boy's desire to go to the >> men's room rather than the women's at McDonald's will become a major >> dilemma. That right there, in the midst of clattering trays and >> screaming children, >> issues of independence and gender identity will >> be weighed against the prospect that a child molester may be lurking in >> that restroom. >> >> However decisive she may be at the office, she >> will second-guess herself constantly as a mother. >> >> Looking at my attractive daughter, I want to >> assure her that eventually she will shed the pounds of pregnancy, but >> she will never feel the same about herself. >> >> That her life, now so important, will be of less >> value to her once she has a child. That she would give herself up in a >> moment to save her offspring, but will also begin to hope for more >> years, not to accomplish her own dreams, but to watch her child >> accomplish theirs. >> >> I want her to know that a cesarean scar or shiny >> stretch marks will become badges of honor. >> >> My daughter's relationship with her husband will >> change, but not in the way she thinks. >> >> I wish she could understand how much more you >> can love a man who is careful to powder the baby or who never hesitates >> to play with his child. >> >> I think she should know that she will fall in >> love with him again for reasons she would now find very unromantic. >> >> I wish my daughter could sense the bond she will >> feel with women throughout history who have tried to stop war, >> prejudice and drunk driving. >> >> I want to describe to my daughter the >> exhilaration of seeing your child learn to ride a bike. >> >> I want to capture for her the belly laugh of a >> baby who is touching the soft fur of a dog or cat for the first time. >> >> I want her to taste the joy that is so real it >> actually hurts. >> >> My daughter's quizzical look makes me realize >> that tears have formed in my eyes. >> >> "You'll never regret it," I finally say. >> >> Then I reached across the table, squeezed my >> daughter's hand and offered a >> silent prayer for her, and for me, and for all >> the mere mortal women who stumble their way into this most wonderful of >> callings. >> >> Please share this with a Mom that you know or >> all of your girlfriends who may someday be Moms. >> >> May you always have in your arms the one who is >> in your heart. >
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Eleanore Moderator Posts: 2512 From: Japan Registered: Aug 2003
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posted April 19, 2007 09:10 PM
Thanks, lovely*.IP: Logged |
nattie33 Knowflake Posts: 451 From: USA Registered: Aug 2005
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posted April 19, 2007 09:24 PM
That describes it exactly.IP: Logged |
naiad Knowflake Posts: 1645 From: Registered: Sep 2006
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posted April 19, 2007 11:49 PM
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pixelpixie Knowflake Posts: 5301 From: Ontario Canada Registered: Jun 2005
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posted April 20, 2007 12:56 AM
*sniffIP: Logged |
pixelpixie Knowflake Posts: 5301 From: Ontario Canada Registered: Jun 2005
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posted April 20, 2007 12:59 AM
passes by again to qualify that 'sniff' with a 'cry' which is what it actually was.. a big bloopy-teared one.IP: Logged |
Motherkonfessor Knowflake Posts: 1140 From: Registered: Oct 2003
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posted April 20, 2007 01:10 AM
I cried too- and I have read this before-thinking of my mother. thinking of my best friend, about to give birth... and thinking of myself, for I will never be this, I will never really feel this. MK IP: Logged |
lovely* Knowflake Posts: 2141 From: CA Registered: Jul 2003
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posted April 20, 2007 03:30 AM
i cried too.i cry again knowing others *feel* it. being a woman is awesome... i think of my little girls and how we may have these conversations. IP: Logged |
future_uncertain Knowflake Posts: 2681 From: ohio Registered: Aug 2004
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posted April 20, 2007 10:32 PM
*sob* I KNOW!!! IP: Logged |
NAM Knowflake Posts: 1995 From: Sunny place. Registered: Jan 2007
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posted April 20, 2007 10:40 PM
very touching, very nice.I am almost in tears. I wonder if fathers would ever feel anything close to this?------------------ Sun in Cancer Moon in Cancer Sag Asc. IP: Logged |