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Author
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Topic: input please
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financechick
unregistered
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posted February 06, 2003 11:59 PM
 
Guy A and GUy B are friends, GIRL likes Guy A but due to the fact that she works with him, she does nothing to pursue a deeper, meaningful relationship, she just admires his Virgoness from afar...BUT whenever Girl invites guy A out, he always invites Guy B along so tonight GUy B comes along to meet with Guy A and Girl is there...Guy A flirts with Girl as usual but Guy B corners her and talks to her for while much to Guy A's disatisfaction. So it's time to leave nd Guy B is parked in the same area as Girl but also near where Guy A is parked so they all walk together until it's time to split up...when GUy B and Girl go to get to their cars parked a few from eachother...then GUy B says..."want to go out sometime?" Girl says "Sure" then immediately wants to kick herself...she then says...that she's sorry but has to tell him that she is really attracted to Guy A even though she works with him and knows nothing probably will ever happen.Did Girl (ME) do the right thing and why does this stuff happen? Why can't I just get the one I want (Guy A...the Virgo)??? IP: Logged |
Alena
unregistered
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posted February 07, 2003 12:11 AM
Oh Finance.......what are you doing to yourself? I am hesitant in how to respond. Is guy B cute?IP: Logged |
financechick
unregistered
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posted February 07, 2003 12:17 AM
not as cute as Guy A...the "spark" just isn't there....IP: Logged |
Alena
unregistered
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posted February 07, 2003 12:36 AM
Is guy A involved with anyone?IP: Logged |
RubyRedRam
unregistered
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posted February 07, 2003 01:33 AM
The problem I had with my Virgo is that he never made a move on me and I always got mixed signals....So one day I said 'wanna hug' and he said 'yeh' and as I leaned over we hugged and he kissed me. Moral of the story: make your feeling OBVIOUS. Make a move or ask him out. IP: Logged |
Lost Leo
unregistered
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posted February 07, 2003 01:42 AM
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theFajita
unregistered
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posted February 07, 2003 02:42 AM
True my first love was a Virgo and he was so shy and cute. I did have to be the aggressive one in the relationship. Financechick it seems to me you better get used to guys liking you  Can I get your secret?? Anyhow I know it can suck to not have the ones we like like us in return. Did you ever think maybe guy B- not the virgo, right, guy B liked you first and guy A is his friend and so guy A is trying to be loyal to his friend but might stil like you.. LOL i hope that made sense. d ------------------
Food is the only art that nourishes! IP: Logged |
Annie Kuzma
unregistered
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posted February 07, 2003 07:15 AM
Pray that your heart and eyes are opened.Us Virgos are not the agressive types,I was always every guys "friend"!!! I married my husband because he called me!!!
hahahahaha!!!! When guy B calls you, just be honest and explain. It may have been discussed between guy A and B.
Guys don't play games like us girls do. IP: Logged |
financechick
unregistered
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posted February 07, 2003 11:42 AM
I was honest with Guy B in telling him I'm very attracted to Guy A and that it wouldn't be right for me to go out with him (guy B).I could sense Guy A was feeling a bit..I odn't know the word I'm looking for...kind of like he know what GUy B was going to ask me and maybe he thought I would say yes...he seemed sad...Guy A...the Virgo. yeah...guys like me..but it never seems to go in my favor...I want GUY A WHAH.....  IP: Logged |
Kat
unregistered
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posted February 07, 2003 01:22 PM
Isn't love complicated!! I have something similar going on. I'm drawn to Guy A. (Strangely, I did this meditation and he showed up 12 hours later. I even saw his aura -- light rays coming from him- no joke-- no I'm not on drugs) So I'm really wondering why this happened. But everytime I speak to him , it's awkward and there's no flow in the conversation. (He's a bit shy.) So, I asked the universe for an opportunity to get to know this person better.I decided I would manifest a date -- a Sunday afternoon drive in the country. I went to my church dressed for the weather and the occasion and out of nowhere Guy B showed up and stole the show. He asked me if I wanted to go on a drive in the country and we did. It was a great day. I told him I was interested in Guy A and thought we could be just friends. But being a hottie Virgo there was too much chemistry for that and he was just too critical for anything more. Guy A, meanwhile is seeing someone else. I now realize that perhaps neither one is the "one." Sometimes I think we think there is only choice A or B but there is C, D, E, F, G, and more other choices. I don't know why this stuff happens! Especially when it seems to be divinely guided. So did you do the right thing? I don't know. I think all is fair in love. I have a friend who went with some guy for 9 years. Then, she met my cousin. She didn't know what to do with this situation for about a month. Finally, she dumped the guy she was seeing for nine years and now is with my cousin. They are now happily married, living the life they want and have been together for fifteen years. So may advice is go for what you want and if it doesn't work out, move on. But don't rule out B if your compatible.Just communicate it or the opportunity is lost. IP: Logged |
Aphrodite
unregistered
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posted February 07, 2003 02:17 PM
"BUT whenever Girl invites guy A out, he always invites Guy B along."Are you pursuing him  Is he pursuing you in return? Sounds like not. Sorry. IP: Logged |
Alena
unregistered
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posted February 07, 2003 02:49 PM
I think you're answer lies in the fact that guy A invites guy B along all the time. When I was younger my friends and I used to sit around trying to figure out if the guys we liked also liked us back, which was alot of time wasted. I don't know how well this is going to go over with you but.......it goes back to a basic premise, which is..........if you've given signals to this guy that you like him and he does nothing about it then either he is already involved with someone else or he is not that interested. I'm sorry if it sounds harsh. I know it's not what you want to hear. I say it for your own good.IP: Logged |
financechick
unregistered
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posted February 07, 2003 03:20 PM
actually...Guy A (the one I work with) casts lines out to me all the time but I refrain from biting because we work together....I have had so many coworkers come into my office and tell me how OBVIOUS it is that A likes me...but I'm scared of even persuing the work relationship and he's made some comments lately that lead me to believe that he thinks I'm not interested..which would fit since I'm not "biting"...I just do not know what to do with Guy A because I really like my job.Most people tell me not to date people I work with...but I think they're going from the idea of having sex with that person...of course I AM physically attracted to him but that's the last thing on my list with him...my attraction to him is so much more meaningful because I like being in his company...talking to him...he makes me laugh. IP: Logged |
Aphrodite
unregistered
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posted February 07, 2003 04:19 PM
They are friends and being that he always brings along B, B is going to tell A what you told him. Coupled with the fact that you are the one asking him out, he is always bringing a friend along, and driving separate cars are major hints.IP: Logged |
financechick
unregistered
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posted February 07, 2003 05:54 PM
I didn't ask B out, he asked me out.Generally, whenever there's a social thing after work, I FOLLOW A in my car but A was stuck in a meeting when it was time to leave. He is always coming into my office to talk, always inviting me along to lunch, always asking me what my plans are for the weekend...like he's trying to get the nerve to ask me to join him. I'm just scared of where it might lead. IP: Logged |
Lost Leo
unregistered
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posted February 07, 2003 07:16 PM
dramaIP: Logged |
Alena
unregistered
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posted February 08, 2003 12:09 AM
Finance if I were in your situation I would back away from socializing with him too much for the next couple of weeks. Aphrodite is right......you know guy b is going to tell him what you said. It's time to regroup and reassess. Hang out with friends that you don't work with for now. See how it goes.IP: Logged |
Aphrodite
unregistered
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posted February 08, 2003 12:29 AM
I am not going to argue with you FC  You did ask for our input. Not our fault you don't like it  Good luck.  Aphrodite IP: Logged |
RubyRedRam
unregistered
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posted February 08, 2003 01:33 AM
Whats the law against dating someone you work with? No, its not complicated, it doesnt have to be. I say, be clear, consise and confident. Ask him out on a date. Not for drinks, not for lunch. If you are worried so much about the work thing then forget him and move on. If he rejects you, then thats his loss and move on...at least it will clear your current confusion.JUST DO IT!!!!!!!!!! I want you to ask him out on a date (just the two of you) before the end of this month. I DARE you. IP: Logged |
Aselzion
Moderator Posts: 44
From: North Andover, MA
Registered: May 2009
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posted February 08, 2003 02:09 AM
Greetings...Having seen such posts from you over the past several months that I've been here, I have only one un-enlightened thing to say... Poop or get off the pot! Either you want to date him or you don't. If you do... DO. If you don't... DON'T. Either way.. do what you have to do and get over it! There is an old expression: don't poopie where you eat! If you buy into this then just put Virgoan guy A behind you. If you REALLY BUY INTO IT, then you shouldn't be dating guy B either... I don't get where your confusion is. All I know is that I've been seeing posts like this for 3 months or so, and I think it's getting a wee bit old. Sorry if this seems harsh, but it is what it is... I wish you well though, whatever you decide... Aselzion IP: Logged |
financechick
unregistered
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posted February 08, 2003 08:11 AM
APhrodite...it's not that I disagree with you, it's that your posts made no sense at all.And for the person who had the post before this one...yes, I've heard the saying..don't sh8t where you eat...in the past, I have dated people I work with without a problem, but I'm new at this job and this job is very "high up" and Guy A is on the same level so I think the rules change slightly...I'm afraid to persue becasue I'm new at this job. I do like him quite a bit, he really is a wonderful guy and we've all only been out socially 3 times, with other coworkers. I get the impression that you all think I invite GUy A on purpose...that's not the case, he gets invited because he's part of the work group...we all go out as a group. I've brought friends along before and I'm certain that's why Guy A invites Guy B along. But you are correct, I DO need a plan of action I want to communicate it the proper way though, I don't want to make him feel uncomfortable. Like today, I'm supposed to meet some members of my group to Volunteer with HAbitat for Humanity, Guy A isn't going because he plays touch Football on Saturday. IP: Logged |
Alena
unregistered
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posted February 08, 2003 10:55 AM
Hi FC. It's hard to understand the whole picture with you and the Virgo because we all have limited information. I think you need to decide what you want to do. I mean if you want to take a chance and go out with him on a date. If you decide you do want to go out with him then I say maybe send him an email asking him out. This way neither of you has to feel uncomfortable in person. Personally, I say you can post as many of these messages as you want to. I'm sure you are not so much asking our advice as you are unloading your frustration.IP: Logged |
Jaqueline
unregistered
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posted February 08, 2003 02:38 PM
To what Aselzion said 
quote:
All I know is that I've been seeing posts like this for 3 months or so, and I think it's getting a wee bit old.Sorry if this seems harsh, but it is what it is...
Sorry FC, but I have to ask you :
Are you sure you're a Lioness ? We all know that we can only give what we possessed, like this, just who is capable to love ,can be loved by the others. The road for a good self - esteem is in to cultivate good thoughts and to have in mind that our thoughts are our most constant company...
FC, you have to recognize your own qualities and all the potentiality that you bring inside of you to grow, to learn and to become well and better.
The best strategy to love and to be loved by somebody especial, is to become special too.
The universe works as a mirror and all that we transmitted, returns for us amplified.
So,make your decisions in a conscious way, if it works, great, if it doesn't , no problem... get up, shake the dust and begin everything again ...
The day that you become a more resolved person, your life will have a new direction !
Follow your heart, follow your mind, follow whatever you want...but please, follow yourself... IT IS POSSIBLE TO CHANGE OUR LIVES AND THE ATTITUDE OF THOSE THAT SURROUND US SIMPLY CHANGING OURSELVES
(RUDOLF DREIKUS) I wish you luck... Jaqueline
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financechick
unregistered
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posted February 08, 2003 09:45 PM
you are missing the point entirely, it has nothing to do with whether I'm a true Lioness as much as the fact that we work together in a high profile position and I don't know how to proceed...it's not like this is my third "high profile" position...it's my first..an dI like this job and I need to proceed cautiously...if AT ALL and I'm just not sure of the protocol...how would I even go about doing this....e-mail is not an option because of the business implications...going in his office and closing the door is not an option because we already have people looking at us and saying (at least to me on the qt) what a great couple we would make...so you know if it's being said to me....it's being said to him as well.I do not know how to proceed and it has nothing to do with being a Leo and everything to do with having/maintaining some kind of integrity. Nobody has given me any advice as far as that goes...not one this borad or in real life...and please don't tell me I'm making it more than it is...because I KNOW that I'm not...I know it's possible to have a decent relationship with someone you work with I'm just not sure how to go about it because of our positions in the company. IP: Logged |
Lost Leo
unregistered
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posted February 08, 2003 10:34 PM
You're talking about it too much, and overthinking can possibly ruin it.I am just as bad, I get all hyped up on a chick and once I go telling everyone my hype it nevers works out the way I want it to. It's better to proceed as if nothing's happening, then when something does happen it's such a sweet surprise!! And if you're looking on how to proceed in a work environment the answer is DON'T... but if you feel this something SO BIG that you life might be changed forever by it then take away the game, show some interest, and expect when things get more serious that one of you will have to leave that company to work elsewhere, that will just HAVE to happen. Good Luck! IP: Logged | |
Lindaland
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