posted July 25, 2004 11:27 PM              

He told me he's going to Michigan to visit the sister of his ex girlfriend, the cancer? because they were always close, and he rented a cabin on the lake? So I am not happy. I expressed my feelings but they were typically drowned out by an hour long Gemini flood of words so I gave up.

What should I be thinking? My mind is blank on how to handle this or if the Gemini is sad, happy, leaving what? I know I'm not happy, and I suppose this means I am ready to date again, and quickly before winter sets in and everyone goes into hibernation. I don't want to feel I gave up my summer to a not so close friend.

I thought Geminis were communicators? So far I haven't received any kind of clear communication, emails are misinterpreted, phone calls miss me because he forgets when I'm home. He doesn't remember anything I tell him, or doesn't care to follow through.

So far I have had the worst experience with communication with this man. Everything I say goes out the window. I have to repeat everything I say twice and then he tells me the same stories over and over again until I have to hang up. Nothing is ever resolved, or talked about. We end up talking about wine, or olives for an hour.

Is he drunk? He sounds nervous, confused and bellligerent. I just don't know how to tell since his babbling is so confusing. Of course he won't say anything that would hurt my feelings.

Does anyone know how to tell if a Gemini actually wants a relationship other than the obvious sexy conversation? Do they ever get cuddly and romantic or is it just like loving a big rock? Also how can you tell when one is easing you out?

posted July 25, 2004 11:50 PM              

That's the thing, Gemini's are almost always emotionally immature, and it can be extremely hard for them to convey emotion, let alone communicate. All those Taurean influences don't help matters either. But let me ask you, how do YOU feel personally? Do you think he wants a relationship? You want to be straightforward, yet subtle with him, because Geminis are very afraid of commitment.

posted July 26, 2004 12:54 AM            

He is going to try to sleep with this woman.
Whether he has or not already, he is close with her, and doesn't want to get into a big thing with you over it... but you know it is something he would do. Maybe hw wants to get away with it, and continue to see you as well. I don't know if you are cool with that. My guess is no. I don't know if he will admit it or bnot, but it is obvious.

posted July 26, 2004 01:50 AM              

You know I've tried to be as polite as possible about the Gemini because I so want you to be happy, and because you have been such a great friend for me.

Responding to just this last post of yours, he seems like the type of Gemini who communicates to confuse, and does not know how to listen.

Mr. T had Merc in Gemini along with that Mars in Cancer. So you can just imagine how much better I got at reading "man code" after dating him. (go away little boy ....)

Love ya Natasha!!

posted July 26, 2004 08:56 AM              

I am going to start dating others and put myself out there again, this is crazy. he insists on being called my boyfriend, and wants a long term monogamous relationship, but wants to act like a 17yrd old playboy. I am not good at hiding my feelings, so I won't.

We can be friends, whatever that means to him, it means something else to me. If I set my standards by everyone else's I would be in trouble.

Thanks for the support, I will let you know if I start dating a Capricorn or an Aquarius. For some reason Caps keep popping up in my life.

posted July 26, 2004 11:31 AM              

If this Gem isn't communicating well, it's because he doesn't know what he wants. He could be playing with you - not because he thinks you're a fool, but because he trying to buy time to sort out what he really wants from you. Not very polite, but Geminis are very prone to stringing people along, so distracted by their own inner confusion that they don't realize they're jerking the other person around.

Gems can be quite forgetful, but in all honesty, if he's forgeting things, it's because he's not putting them very high in his priorities. Geminis will remember things - if they want to. Don't ever fall for the Gemini charm and let them weasel out with the "Oh, I just forgot..sorry" spiel. This is where you can get demanding of a Gemini, and if they care about you, they were at least demonstrate an effort to remember these things.

posted July 26, 2004 12:37 PM              

He does say I am not demanding at all, which suprises me. I talked to him and he seemed moody about having to change his plans. I flat out do not want him to take this trip. He may not listen but at least I said what I had to say, and he can't say he didn't understand me.

He said he liked it when I was more demanding, and was only aggravated since he couldn't see me. So I told him to get his butt up to see me more often. I gave him the motivation, but he is confused, and a little immature. I told him I am not always happy with him.

Anyway, his Venus is in Cancer and he does feel bonded to who he is with at the moment, at this point I don't know about earth and water venus signs anymore. It seems they never understand me. I have Venus in Aries, my favorite Venus signs so far are Sag and Pisces, but then my first house is ruled by Mars in Sag.

posted July 26, 2004 12:50 PM            

I want to post something in response. I need to run a bunch of errands (moving bites as you know...LOL) But I understand alot of what you are saying. There is a big reason I don't generally date Gemini men (maybe because being a Sag there can only be one flighty person to make a relationship work). Speaking of Flighty - we both are- my polar opposite and I. We need guidlines, even if we say we don't.

Quickly, you know I am engaged to a Bull baby with Venus in Cancer. Well, he tries not to be demanding, because he worries it will push me away. Yesterday his being complacent almost had me flying into Phoenix to see my dad and then driving out to his place the next day. Well, he didn't say he WANTED me to come right out and see him, infact it seemed like he really didn't care one way or another...but then I heard it..that little tiny hint of disappointment (I am picking up on these things now).

So I said "Hey Baby, do you want me to see you and not stay at my dads that first night?" YES!! YES!!...he responds.

"Well, why didn't you tell me? If you don't make your wishes known, I will run willy nilly trying to make up my own plan".

We're terrible at that...but there is more..more to what is going on with you and Mr. Gemini. I think he is either TRYING to make you jealous and freak out OR he is trying to have it cake and eat it too.

I'll write more later - or e-mail you

Take care,

posted July 26, 2004 01:05 PM              

Interestingly I have three friends with Gemini dads who also abandoned them. I know all Gem's arent bad, but it's true alot of them never grow up. One of my old guy Gemini friends is the biggest most selfish player I've ever seen. He cheats on all of his girlfriends - behind their backs - constantly, and claims to love them so much.

Read "How to Spot a B******D by his Star Sign". by Adele Lang and Suzy Rajah. You will get a deep peek into all of the Geminin man's MANY personalities. There is Mikey, Tony, Frank, Walter, Charles and last but not least Zoltan.

The Gemini man part is the funniest thing I've ever read. Here is a blurb from "How to intruige one":
"Don't require sympathy. Or consistancy. Or fidelity. Or company. Don't ask where he is going or when he might be coming back. Or if he's coming back. And don't ever ask anything more emotionally demanding than "How are you?" or "Where did you get your shoes?"

posted July 26, 2004 03:19 PM            

Sun, Venus and Mars all in Gemini. Moon in Sag. He is amazingly consistent in his inconsistency. Wonderful guy, quick mind and wit, but might as well hold on to a will 'o the wisp.

Oddly, as you folks have pointed out, he could easily handle demands. At least certain ones. Most women bored him to tears. Lucky me, with all my Aries etc., I was not one of those.

We're still friends.

Good luck Natasha, trying to figure out your Gemini. Fidelity is not their favorite sport--though I must point out that Paul McCartney is a Gem and was/is a devoted hubby (or so it seems). Pixie is right, too--renting a cabin in the woods with a woman is not for the purpose of communing with nature unless it's done au natural.

I do wish you luck...

posted July 26, 2004 04:45 PM              

Geminis can be amazingly faithful and devout if you give them the stablity they long for. Making *certain* demands will make them feel like they fit into your world. While Gems liek to move around looking for bright and shiny things to stimulate them like a butterfly searching for nectar, they care very much about finding their niche in the world, and that usually is other people they feel they can rely on.

Gems don't like others to think for them or make up their mind, but they love it when someone tells them their mind about things, especially when they're confused or having trouble deciding from themselves. And while they may not like others thinking for them, since the whole wilderness of emotion is vast mystery for them, they can become very dependant on the people they trust to act like guides for them on emotional matters, like relationships. The whole Gemini "So what do you think about this?" game and trying to get you to speak your mind on things is a lot more that simply inquiry - it's a sign of trust, or at least a willingness to trust, and possibly to let you lead them. Just don't abuse that opportunity.

26Taurus, I'm sorry about your father, but it sounds liek he had a lot more going on than just a Gemini Sun placement. However, to be fair, all signs have they negative side, which can manifest stronger in some individuals than others.

I have that same book, and none of the descriptions are very flattering although largely quite true. It's also a bit biased as I recalled - the women who wrote seemed to particularly dislike Taurus and Sag men (I can't blame them myself), as it was nearly impossible to get a positive compatiblity score. LOL. I particularly liked that the only men I scored high enough on the quizzes to be compatible with were Geminis and Pisceans, and their comments were "You should be institutionalized" and "You deserve each each."

Another charmingly unflattering and viciously on-target look at the Zodiac is a new book called Darkside Zodiac. I highly recomend this. Mind you, this author says Geminis are A++ bitches.

posted July 29, 2004 10:17 AM              

I noticed that when you break it off with a Gemini, he will be very flirty again, however I do not forgive well with an 8th house moon. I tend to think good long term friendships are built on forgiveness and trust, two things which Geminis do not seem to place importance on.

Sometimes i break it off with my friends but I know that eventually we will trust each other again. I need to know a man can trust me if I argue with him, and this Gemini is very defensive and wants to sweep everything under the rug.

I don't like that.

In any case, I have broken it off with him, without any drama, and he is more smitten with me than ever. Apparently if you want a Gemini to adore you, just ignore him.

posted July 29, 2004 01:12 PM              

Your male perspective has been refreshing and very much appreciated by us gals. I'm sure I'm not the only one here who values your perspective. I could listen to you all day. (Nothing to do with me being a Libra and in love with a Libra... seriously).

Natasha -

When you talk about the Gemini guy, I refer back to some of the behavior of my ex Mr. Taurus because so much of it is the same. And there's some similarities astrologically as well, in the sense of planetary "influences", as he had Mercury & Vesta in Gemini in his 10th, and also had (notice I'm using past tense although he's may still be alive) - he also had Jupiter, Ceres & Juno in Pisces.

These influences tend to make them even more slippery. And you talk about being defensive? He had that Mars & Saturn in Cancer, Venus & Chiron in Aries, and a Leo Asc for good measure.

I really am not much of the type who likes to keep guys adoring me for the sake of having control, I'm more the type who is willing to sacrifice a great deal, and hope they are the type who can appreciate it. I'm still learning how to train the "little boys" - but actually - I'm not even interested in doing that. I like to feel equal.

What I'm trying to say is, I get bored easily. You are a Taurus with Cancer Moon, and I'm a Taurus Rising with Cancer moon, so I do understand. And hell, at least they are entertaining enough to keep around until the real thing comes along.

HA! HA! HA!

posted July 29, 2004 02:21 PM              

quote:

---

That's the thing, Gemini's are almost always emotionally immature, and it can be extremely hard for them to convey emotion, let alone communicate. All those Taurean influences don't help matters either

---

posted August 01, 2004 08:09 AM              

Virgo-Aries-Artist, I am happy to hear from you, and thank you for the kind words. I know how warm hearted you are and how much of a chance you gave your Gemini. If he is still acting spacey then I can understand your grief. After all you have the honest Aries influence. I can related with Mars conjunct my first house in Sag.

Romance is so much about emotional honesty and some people are just not cut out to be romantic, in this lifetime.

I wouldn't say I was all that determined, I am happy to hear a reason, but I don't think I'll ever get what I really want, which is an apology. I will have to hear that from others.

I think I misjudged the situation as usual though, you have to understand, my Taurus sun is very jealous, and my 8th house moon doesn't help. I can't stand any flirting around me at all, and I have been pretty angry at times, more so than I think a Gemini woman would be.

I don't think he was going to be with another woman, in the physical sense, but the emotional sense. Still that irks me more. I know he wanted to see his ex and be close to someone else in order to get space. And marriage builders says independent behavior without thinking of the other person is disrespecful. I agree, thinking for yourself is one thing, being selfish is another.

He told me he isn't going anymore since I argued with him and instead wants to take me on a cruise, actually it was my idea from before but now he is all for it. Of course life is like that, you don't always get what you want when you want it, you only get what you need, maybe, sometimes.

With or without cruise, I have to make a decision, or else I will be sick with worry. My first impulse is to cut off contact, but that's not good for me. It never works for long. Instead I will flat out tell him, with marriage builders data, how feel about commitment. If he doesn't get it, he can't say I didn't give him a chance, mentally and emotionally, he has to relate on the spot.

the weird thing is it really turns him on when I fry him like that on the spot, and he becomes undone. I believe he really loves me, but I want a different kind of love, more real, less insecure.

Ever Taurus likes security, even with Gemini in the 7th house, even if it's an electric blanket. And I get too PO'd too quickly..

But not he wasn't going to sleep with anyone else, mainly because he doesn't have that kind of energy, he is faithful but he did let it drop he went to a strip club two weeks ago and wants to introduce me to one of the strippers who he thought would "get along" with me.

So...

He's just out of hot water, and then he throws himself into the fire! The guy is just not good for my blood pressure. This Mars conjunct first house in Sag is better off with an Aqua, or a Taurus!

posted August 01, 2004 08:31 AM              

I have hurt a few Libras's feelings in my time, but Libras deserve a real commitment, the real problem I think with Venus in Aries is that love has to be deserved, and that placement tend to get too jealous, too fast, to slow down and appreciate. I am glad things are working out with Mr. Libra,