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Author Topic:   Gemini Boyfriend's hurtful Words! Please Help!
Bliss
Newflake

Posts: 0
From: Vancouver, Canada
Registered: May 2010

posted July 26, 2004 03:05 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Bliss     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Hi,

My Gemini boyfriend is really hurting me at the moment…
Recently he has been making general smart comments like how I am crazy for him and that he is a real stud or something, I know that he is doing it to get a reaction out of me so I just act indifferent. During the last few days he has been telling me how he misses going out on the pull with his friends and one of his female friends that he regularly talks about he told me the other night what a “stunningly beautiful girl” she is and how they had slept together before. This was a long time ago, but why is he going on about it? He told me about his doubts about us. I think he is looking for a reaction when he talks like this to me (maybe I’m wrong).
I know that he is entitled to his opinion, but these comments really hurt, and its like I am thinking thoughts that were not once there. He often asks me would I marry him in the future, as he thinks I am the type of girl he could only hope for, and is always telling me he loves.
Does anyone have any advice? I would really appreciate it. Thanks x (I am a Taurean girl by the way)

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26taurus
unregistered
posted July 26, 2004 03:09 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
EVIL GEMINIS Sorry to hear Bliss.
Go to the thread "Sexy Geminis Drive me Nuts". Sorry I don't have more time to give you advice....off to work

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astro junkie
unregistered
posted July 26, 2004 03:48 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
What's happening with the Gemini's? They are all going nuts!! It will probably be my turn next.

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Gemini Nymph
unregistered
posted July 26, 2004 04:02 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
There's no reason for you to put up with that kind of behavior. But sadly it looks like you're at the typical gridlock of a Taurus-Gemini matchup: Taurus is getting hurt by Gemini's insensitivity; Gemini's bored and is looking for a way out. Sorry, but the truth is that as a Gemini he may find a Taurus gal a little too fuddy-duddy. But that's not excuse for him to treat you badly (actually that kind of emotional manipulation isn't typically Gemini - most just pack their bags and go without leaving a note, so there must be something non-Gemini going on in is chart spurring him to behave like that). If he misses his buds so much and is casting his eye around, cut him loose. Seriously. Tauri are just too possessive for Geminis for the long term, and Gems to unpredictable for Tauri. If you're not ready to end the relationship, maybe the two of you just need some time apart and sort out what each of you want in this relationship.

And another thing: I have found that Tauri constantly, and I mean constantly think they can change a Gemini. Those that say they don't are in denial. But the truth you can't change anyone. Especially Gemini. Accept this, and you'll be a lot happier. (Granted, I think you'd be a lot happier if you dumped his Gem *** cold and went and found yourself a nice Virgo or Pisces man - but I wouldn't want to tell you what to do ).

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Gemini Nymph
unregistered
posted July 26, 2004 04:08 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Astro, be on the look out for the VHS series coming soon: Geminis Gone Wild!!!

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Impish One
unregistered
posted July 26, 2004 05:22 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Hi Bliss,
I feel your pain.
Your Gemini boyfriend sounds EXACTLY like the Gemini guy I used to date! He did exactly the same things to me.
He really drove me crazy. It took a long time to get over him, and he really left emotional scars on my heart.

You deserve better.

Sincerely,
Serena

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libra78
unregistered
posted July 26, 2004 05:59 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Geminis guys are entirely changeable, I just dont think the Taurus is the one who can do it, I've seen it fail, and Taurus is too homely for the wild Gemini. Also, Gemini comes after Taurus, so that only adds to Taurus' confusion. Again, look at my posting in the other current Gemini thread. I like Gemini's but dont think you can have a nice committed relationship, esp if they are still young, these things need time,a nd I think they have to come from their initiative to work really.

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astro junkie
unregistered
posted July 26, 2004 06:35 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I'm beginning to think they still haven't recuperated from that quadruple Gemini Transit...

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Bliss
Newflake

Posts: 0
From: Vancouver, Canada
Registered: May 2010

posted July 26, 2004 07:11 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Bliss     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Hi,

Thanks for your replies.
I just don't know what to do? We are going out now nearly a year, and I first read Linda's sun sign description of a gemini male when we were already togehter a couple of months. It gave me great insight,(it was scary how he matched the decription so closely). I think after reading it I made allowances for him, as I think I understand why he acts like he does.But am I being a fool? Its so hard to know. I think 80% is really wonderful, but when he does this it hurts. Sometimes I wonder am I being too sensitive or am I wasting my time. I really do not want to do something I might regret. I just find it hard because I do love him.
I guess maybe I am being too proud and don't want him to know how much it bothers me.
any more advice would be appreciated. D x

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Total Pieces
Newflake

Posts: 2
From: Los Angeles, CA USA
Registered: Oct 2009

posted July 26, 2004 07:43 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Total Pieces     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Gemini or not.

You don't deserve to be treated badly. If he wants to go then he should just go but to say things to hurt your feelings???

Can you tell him that he is hurting your feelings and what is up???

If he is always like this than you will have to decide...not to take it personally and not try to change him...(Like GN said) and just deal...do you want to just deal? If you married him...it won't get better...

Just my opinion...I know it is easier to say than to do...

Good Luck

Amber
Libra

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sthenri
unregistered
posted July 26, 2004 07:45 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Wow Bliss, you sound a lot like me! I am also a Taurus dating a Gemini and he's not young.

I know Taurus women need reassurance most of all, and don't like to be pushed around. We are not always homebound, but we like to be part of the process, and know what the other is thinking.

Geminis like to be confusing, and like to be the one who is the leader of the relationship. I bet he is trying to feel sure of you, when he says those things, to make himself feel more secure.

I think it's better to get objective advice like you are doing, but your security is built on resistance to changing your values-normal. The Gemini male just wants to engage and have a good time, he wants to be dominated a bit I think.

In any case I am taking this test often, http://www.marriagebuilders.com/
go to this site and read under emotional needs, so take quizes and find out once and for all if you are compatible with the Gemini. If not, then it's not your fault. There are more men out there, it's just that you can't change what you need from day to day, and he can.

Better to work on what you can change, which is your attitude towards a committed relationship. If you stay positive towards that, then everything will work out for you. This site has helped me be true to what I need,

You will find a man who is more proactive in talking to you about what you want, and need instead of talking at you.

Sites like marriagebuilders help you figure out what you need so you can communicate.

Good Luck,
Natasha
Taurus

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Bliss
Newflake

Posts: 0
From: Vancouver, Canada
Registered: May 2010

posted July 27, 2004 06:55 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Bliss     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Hi,

Just thought I would bump the thread. Anymore advice I would be grateful. I haven't seen him since sunday, he asked to meet me tonight, but I said no. Will arrange to meet him tomorrow and try and say it to him. I hope it goes ok, I don't wanna do something I might regret. D xx

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born-on-05-23
unregistered
posted July 29, 2004 05:10 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Hi Bliss,
Don't worry Gemini's normally have their tendency to drive their attention towards their most loved once. But I don't why he does that for you. Anyway keep in mind Gemini's are more lovable! Wait untill he come back to you.

IGGI

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sthenri
unregistered
posted July 29, 2004 10:14 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Bliss, I already gave you the advice you need. If you break up with him, he'll do anything to win you back. When you are with him, he will say whatever pops into his mind, that's the way he is, but if you go to marriagebuilders.com you will be able to confront him with the Need for Affection, and the Love Busters Questions, that will make him think about the relationship.

Otherwise you will just tread water, and nothing will change. You can enlighten him, and that's all, you can do.

Natasha
Taurus

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Bliss
Newflake

Posts: 0
From: Vancouver, Canada
Registered: May 2010

posted July 29, 2004 06:09 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Bliss     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Hi,

Thanks again for your replies.
Just thought I would let ye know how it went.
I met he last determined to say it to him (and not chicken out). He knew something was up, so I told him his comments lately are really getting me and that it hurts.
He was trully shocked! He had no idea. I told him that what was I supposed to think when he says such things. He admitted that he can say things that just pop into his head and how he can be (brutally) honest to a fault. While I understand he can't control how he feels, I told him that he has to stop, as I just can't listen to these things. It was so hard, he looked so hurt to think that he hurt me so much, but how things will pan out I'm still not sure, I just hope we can be kind to each and that it is for the best.
I'm glad I said, as it lifted a great weight off my shoulders.
Men are really from Mars and women are from Venus.
D xx

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