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Author
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Topic: Scorpios and Control
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calliope
unregistered
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posted May 05, 2005 04:52 AM
 
I'm intrigued to know what is meant by the statement that Scorpios have a need to "control" their partners, because the question that springs to my mind is, control what exactly?
I don't actually believe it's necessarily a case of controlling things like the type of friends one socialises with, the way one dresses, etc. etc. That is all surface stuff, really, and I have come up against other signs that do exactly the same thing!! Scorpios are more likely to be honest about what they like and don't like - but in no way does that mean that one should be a slave!!So what I believe, ultimately, is that they maybe seek to control the way you feel about them, that is, if they are interested in you and you are interested in them, and depending on the net level of interest circulating at the time. I've read a lot of rubbish about them needing someone "supportive and submissive" - well, supportive, OK, but SUBMISSIVE??? Please! For an Aries, being submissive is positively damaging! I think "submissive" is the wrong adjective. Something more along the lines of allowing oneself to relax and enjoy the experience  would be more in order. I don't think Scorpios actually like yes-men, or people who are too "easy" (easy to control?). They like a challenge as much as Aries does. I don't think the Scorpio I'm mesmerized by could tell me how to run my life, and I certainly wouldn't tell him how to run his, but I hope he realises at the same time how much I love him, and value his support. His loyalty as a friend makes me feel so warm inside.  Calliope  IP: Logged |
cancerrg
unregistered
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posted May 05, 2005 05:01 AM
submission : cancers sound like that but they actually are not that way . i too give a impression that way , intially and thats the time required to gain scorps faith , so may be in a way they like submission but thats only up to a point .because i have never seen a real submissive cancer , even i am not and do get along with scorps quite well , the veey important thing with them is faith more than submission .IP: Logged |
cancerrg
unregistered
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posted May 05, 2005 05:04 AM
I don't think Scorpios actually like yes-men, or people who are too "easy" (easy to control?).
_____________________________________________
i agree , iam not a yes man , ok i dont criticise someone upfront initially( unless i am close to the person ) but being a yes man , nope.
i ahve an aries ascedent.IP: Logged |
calliope
unregistered
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posted May 05, 2005 05:46 AM
*faith more than submission*I like that! IP: Logged |
sue g
unregistered
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posted May 05, 2005 09:15 AM
Hi Calli (I am Scorpio 5 planets and Aries risng - God have mercy on me), I have always been controlling (well more manipulative) in my love relationships until NOW. My very strong Virgo husband wont have any of it!! He is the one that taught me to trust and I am slowly but surely learning (it has been hard). I always had double standards with men - it was okay to do what I wanted, but I always wanted to know where they were, just to keep the upper hand it you like. It has been a great relief for me to 'let go" of this control, it almost destroyed me at times and I am glad that I met someone who "showed me the way", although Ive still a little way to go. Love to all xxxxIP: Logged |
pixelpixie
Newflake Posts: 8
From: ON Canada
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted May 05, 2005 11:02 AM
*steers this thread into a place she likes.*What?  Actually, I do agree with posts so far.
It's not control over people, it is control over circumstances we create and live with for ourselves.
It's a fixed sign thing.
If I had to hang around a yes-man, I'd turn him into something I liked better.
*I am joking.. 'turn him into'? Implying control over him? He..he hehehehehe..... * hollow laughter.*crickets chirping* IP: Logged |
sthenri
unregistered
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posted May 05, 2005 11:49 AM
Faith as in faith in yourself, Scorpios like stability in their partners, same as Pluto/7th house and Pluto/6th house, some danger and excitement is good, but honest commitment is crucial. That is serial monogamy.I have trouble wth serial monogamy, as I do commimt but only half way, to two things at once! Scorpios do not like that much, they are serious about their lives. Even if a Scorpio works in the entertainment field, you had better be serious at what you do. That is my take, on the controlling aspect, after all if you take off for weeks on end for no reason other than to "get clarity" ...that isn't going to fly when you get home,
no affection there! Take Care,
Natasha
Gemini Mercury opposite
Mars Sag conjunct Ascendant IP: Logged |
fayte.m
unregistered
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posted May 05, 2005 01:53 PM
I do not believe in controlling anyone! I do not want to be controlled either! I want people I let into my life to be themselves, to do their own thing. I expect the same respect returned. If there is something I do not like about them, I either accept them despite whatever it is, or they never get into my world in the first place. Individualism is something I respect far too much to desire to control another. "A man convinced against his will, is of the same opinion still." Submissive persons who kiss up, or cower, I feel that I can not trust their motives, and therefore I have no desire for their company. I find that type too weak minded and self degrading to be of any interest to me. If anything, I find it repulsive.
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beebuddy
unregistered
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posted May 05, 2005 03:23 PM
Sue G, A VIRGO TAUGHT YOU!?seriously, my fiance is scorp, with aries asc. and i have a stellium with virgo inc, node and MC and so im curious about what his attitude is that you were able to trust but also not need to know everything every second etc... IP: Logged |
Isis
Newflake Posts: 1
From: Brisbane, Australia
Registered: May 2009
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posted May 05, 2005 04:12 PM
quote:
Submissive persons who kiss up, or cower, I feel that I can not trust their motives, and therefore I have no desire for their company. I find that type too weak minded and self degrading to be of any interest to me.
I totally agree with that sentiment! Personally, I don't want to control people. I want to know that whatever it is they're doing, it's because they want to be doing it, and not because I was somehow able to manipulate them into doing it. It goes back to the suspicious about motives thing, which I think is fairly characteristic of Scorps. I do have a tendency to want to control circumstances in my life, the direction of my life, etc. But you can't always control circumstances any more than you could control people. But I try not to be a victim of circumstance or people. IP: Logged |
calliope
unregistered
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posted May 05, 2005 05:06 PM
fayte.m, Isis - You underlined the vibes I'm getting. A modicum of maturity speaks for itself!! IP: Logged |
Tranquil Poet
unregistered
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posted May 05, 2005 05:52 PM
I don't think Scorpios actually like yes-men, or people who are too "easy" (easy to control?).
I'd have to disagree on that one :/
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wildflwrs
unregistered
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posted May 05, 2005 06:00 PM
Well, I am a female Scorpio...and I am not controlling in a relationship....however, I have a Pisces Moon and mostly receptive placements in my chart. I have a pretty strong gut level feeling about power struggles or control issues. I seem to attract more controlling friends....but not lovers....in my romantic relationships there has always been a give and take....have usually been involved with easy going men. I was involved with a male Scorpio--was only about a 6 month relationship--but he wasn't controlling. I think you have to look at the whole chart....Pluto, Mars....etc.IP: Logged |
beebuddy
unregistered
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posted May 05, 2005 07:46 PM
for pluto, control=securityIP: Logged |
beebuddy
unregistered
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posted May 05, 2005 07:47 PM
eroticism too maybe?but definitly the innate understanding of "power/relationships" with pluto doesnt necessarily lead to harmful manipulative behavior. IP: Logged |
Venus
unregistered
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posted May 05, 2005 07:57 PM
Fayte.mMy sentiments entirely!
Where are ur Sun Moon Asc and Venus? Venus
IP: Logged |
pixelpixie
Newflake Posts: 8
From: ON Canada
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted May 05, 2005 08:00 PM
Tranquil Poet~
quote:
I don't think Scorpios actually like yes-men, or people who are too "easy" (easy to control?).I'd have to disagree on that one :/
Not to beat a dead horse, or pick on you ( as if you aren't picking just cuz you can anyway) You are a tad biased, plus you've got reasonable people here, who know and belong to the Scorpio sign, who give logical reasons, instead of generalizations....
But no doubt you will say
"I didn't ask you, it's just my opinion."IP: Logged |
cancerrg
unregistered
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posted May 06, 2005 05:55 AM
My very strong Virgo husband wont have any of it!! He is the one that taught me to trust and I am slowly but surely learning (it has been hard)
_____________________________________________sue -g : this i think what happens with a scorp's relation with a cancer .
i need to add onething here , all the good(to me )scorp that i know had been in the same materialistic situation that i am and there is one whose mismatches with mine , for him i can say for certain , he wants to show his superiority , so may be they are controling but if u show them what your worth is , they will be all right .
what happens in case of cancers is (maybe) thier nonjudgemental and uncritical (unless close ) attitude makes them comfortable with scorps , even then i have to admit they took time to make me a friend. it was my persistence. IP: Logged |
fayte.m
unregistered
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posted May 06, 2005 09:24 PM
Venus, your reply to me was:
Quote:
"Fayte.m
My sentiments entirely!
Where are ur Sun Moon Asc and Venus?"I'm not very good at astrology, but I'll try and find out. And Thanks for agreeing with me!  IP: Logged |
calliope
unregistered
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posted May 08, 2005 08:30 AM
sue g,I'm intrigued by your story. How was your husband able to manage to get you to trust?
Calli IP: Logged |
fayte.m
unregistered
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posted May 08, 2005 10:51 AM
Venus!..I am not very educated concerning astrology. I think I am the following:Capricorn rising
Moon in Aquarius
Venus in Scorpio The chart was done by mistake, on a birthtime that was a minute off, so I don't know if that would change anything or not. I feel foolish asking, but what does the above mean? And your question about it? IP: Logged |
sue g
unregistered
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posted May 08, 2005 11:34 AM
Beebuddy and Calli, in answer to your question, well he has this very soothing effect on me and being a Virgo he is very mature and at times has made me (being 11 years his senior) feel somewhat foolish with my suspicious nature. I think the answer is TIME. Weve been together for over 16 years, both been faithful (never thought Id be able to say that), and as time has gone on I have learnt (as Fayte said) not to control anyone - it is a horrible way to be. Now me with my very Scorpio and Aries Asc personality I haven't found this easy, but i just know now that I can trust him. The thing that I am so impressed with is the fact that I feel more freedom in my life now than when I wasnt married. Having our son has enabled me to become more independant in that I can go out on my own more than before - I have to or else I wouldnt have a social life. More than that though this guy is SO honourable and REAL, I have driven him mad in the past with my possessiveness and he is the first man that said there way no way he was gonna stand for it. So I suppose for me it is respect for him and of course LOVE that has taught me not to be so insecure. Also being a strong Scorpio woman, I totally respect his ablity to stand up to me - hope that answers your question guys - love to all xxxIP: Logged |
calliope
unregistered
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posted May 08, 2005 12:04 PM
It's wonderful when you can get a Scorpio, or Venus in Scorpio, to trust, because once they do, they truly DO, and it touches your heart.
Calliope IP: Logged |
sue g
unregistered
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posted May 08, 2005 02:00 PM
Lovely words Calli and guess what I have Scorpio Sun and Venus in Scorp too - now I DO trust him, but as for others (especially some women)...........mmmm will reserve judgement on that one hey? Love and trust Sue xxxxIP: Logged |
cappyme
Newflake Posts: 0
From:
Registered: Oct 2009
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posted May 08, 2005 02:43 PM
Actually I have this Scorp friend, and I am telling you, she is the most loyalest person I know, I mean I know her since 4th standard and stuff, and she usually is so sweet to me! and yes she can be a bit controlling but in such a sweet and manipulative way, that I don't mind listening to her, and after all she listens to me, we share that rapport, what stands out is her determiniation and energy and ofcourse her wacky sense of humor and fun. She seems to like cartoons as well as movies and all. She is very sarcastic and laughs a lot. Her best trait is that she is really popular and stuff, and many times (in my school) really popular people tend to get very very arrogant,but not once has her popularity came in between her friendships, she was loyal to all her friends the same way. So she can be a bit controlling but its more of her fixed nature. Anyways you scorpios rock!(and other signs too ofcourse)IP: Logged | |
Lindaland
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