posted July 27, 2005 05:38 PM              

From the very core of their being, Taureans *want* to be self-controlled, self-reliant and self-possessed, but have great difficulty overcoming the influence of their environment. *All* earth sign natives and people with significant earth influence are heavily affected by their envionment, for better or worst. For earth signs, environment reinforces and natures their habitual nature. Taureans, because of their natural pride and stubbornness, need to learn humility in order recognize how it influences their habits are by their enviornment. But that's a tough lesson for them often.

You see, earth signs want to be in control of their enviornments, as it's what gives them a sense of identity and security. They *don't* like finding out their enviorment controls *them.* This makes them feel powerless, and most often, they fight back with sheer denial. If they feel out of control of their environment, they feel out of control of themselves. When this powerlessness get to a critcial point, they will then become very anxious and will either act out or withdraw in self-defense, and in extreme cases this cause very irrational and self-deestructive behavior, like substance abuse. This need to control is also why earthy people often reject treatment or bail out on rehabs when they have addictions - in a sad ironic twist, they often recognize better than most other addicts that they have a problem (as by nature they hate feeling out of control, as addiction would do to them) but they panic if they feel someone else (therapist, counselor, judge, probation officer, rehab center) is taking all their control away from them as well. Then most often, they see the only way to get it back is run.

It's important not to rob an earthy person of what they by nature need. Instead confront them with their choices. Point them toward healthy environments, emphasizing they have more ccntrol over a healthy environment - and more control over *themselves* in a healthy environment - than in an unhealthy enviornment. Give them reasons to choose healthy enviornment that make sense to them as an earth people (i.e, more control, more security, more self-reliance). Once they get into a healthy environment they are naturally nutured into better, healthier habits, and their chance of relaspe become significantly lower than other types of addicts.

posted July 27, 2005 08:33 PM              

They must help themselves. If they want to get off drugs, they will get off drugs.

Its really that simple. Honestly, I'm not trying to sound b!tchy or mean. The best thing you can do for yourself is to try to detach yourself from your brother's cocaine addiction. In doing so, don't allow yourself to become an enabler.

posted July 27, 2005 09:12 PM              

The aquarian I dated before I scared him off with my possessiveness told me that he use to do drugs. He said he once wanted to kill himself. He said he was drunk and high off weed and cocaine. It was like 5am and a police officer stopped him. He was crying like hell and told the cop he was going to take his own life. The cop spoke to him for a while and amde him feel better. the cop took him home and didn't even arrest him when he was smoking weed right in front of him.

Taureans need love in there life to help them. They yearn for the perfect love.

I think everyone really wants to find there happiness. I think I can say many of us feel depressed when we don't get that.

posted July 28, 2005 03:36 AM              

(are u guys sure we all arent related )

its horrible and hes the stubbornest little thing ever arghhhhhhhhh. he has no close ties to any of us and jus hates us to no end, although he will put up fronts to cover it up. and his viewpoints about many things (politics, religion, philosophy etc.) are similar to mine although we are diametrically opposed in activity (im a nerd, hes a party animal), but yet theres little to no REAL communication.

i would say dont cut him off, and keep trying to communicate with him....thats the only thing that i am trying to do. i remember having a conversation similar to this with HSC and how his Taurus girl helped him get off of an addiction. he said to keep trying to understand, be there, and gently explain without pointing fingers or accusing. to always be there, he said, although it takes an enormous amount of emotional energy...

posted July 30, 2005 04:50 PM            

GeminiNympth,

I am finding this to be so incredibly true right now with Mr. Taurus. I saw certain traits and habits over the last year and a half, but they seemed to be getting worse... and now the addictions have emerged. I can't go into it.. but the addictive personality (the lies, head games, anger..etc.) has been going on this whole time and has gotten to the point where I can't be involved anymore. I wish I had known this before.. but I had always suspected it... I can't help him because he is too deep and it has pulled me down with him in a sense (meaning the depression the fights...etc... ) so that I am almost always exhausted over it. Thanks for the information.