posted August 24, 2005 02:59 AM              

Situation
Aqua/1st house Leo Moon/7th house, Venus in Pisces/1st house, Aqua rising, and Mars.

Me
Taurus/6th house, Cancer Moon/8th, Venus Aries/5th, Sag rising conjunct neptune and mars.

Aqua is a bit loose in the truth about what we are doing this weekend, so I go to his house and truth is he has to work, commercial photography at an air show and tries to pass it off as fun. Instead it's fogged in and we spend a miserable time in a tent. I start to cry and he calls me a victim. Then we make up, and he promises the next day to spend the day doing things I want to do. Next day comes, no such luck.

Weather clears and he has to stay and I offer to stay part of the day as his assistant and then take off shopping and wine tasting. He's not happy about it but agreeable. Then before I can leave, obnoxious photographer hits on me and it's so hot and miserable I take his card.

at that moment I try to catch Aqua's eye so he can rescue me but I can't see him. Then he's behind us and glaring at sleazy guy. Sleazy guy goes quiet and scared and I offer to get some food. Aqua doesn't look at me but when I get back, he's wearing dark glasses and says he doesn't want anything from me. Sleazy guy is gone.

Why did I take that guys card just to humour him? I tried to walk away saying I was with someone else but he stepped in front of me and put it out in front, so I had to take it or walk around. He said something about free flying lessons and I said that was nice, as in nice now let me go. I would have moved faster but it was 93 in the shade and I was sweating like crazy and wanted to get away.

Now later I try to kiss Aqua and he says not here, kids are around. Later he brushes me off for dinner saying his ex wife was coming by. Testy argument about how that guy had picked me up and how he was doing that naturally and I was the guilty one. I refused to take responsibility, drank wine, and left telling him to call me when he was over it and mellow again.

Aqua said other women offer and he's said no, but I look like I'm hedging my bets and he's angry and has to re think the relationship. I feel managed and angry that I couldn't talk in front of his ex wife who immediately starting planning his summer with wedding showers, when he knows we had plans. I acted angry and irritable.,

I thought a first house sun would be more honest. And I never thought an Aqua could be jealous, I told him it was just because it was in front of his friends. He doesn't act like he cares what I do in my free time, and in fact he let one of his friends kiss me on the mouth once and laughed it off.

I am trying to choose my battles on this one as he has been very good to me so far, except for one occasion, and he has given me so many things to make my life easier which I appreciate, a cell phone to call him long distance, jewelry, clothes, lots of attention.

I secretly do have a crush on a Cancer which I tried to play out but in typical Cancer fashion he only wants to play when he feels like it, and he doesn't want to talk until after cuddles. Since he tends to go away when he doesn't get cuddled, I can't have a logical conversation with him, and the Aqua came into my life. This week I feel very cold towards the Aqua and imagine the warm cuddles I got from the Cancer before.

Is it my imagination or are cuddles from Cancers better as they go on? And are they always the ones who set the pace? Are Aquas normally cold and not very cuddly? I am finding just this year that I do need a cuddly partner.

Both men have a future, but I was thinking the Aqua was more flexible when I move. The problem with dishonesty in others is that I find it's easier to believe the relationship won't last, because people typically throw in a lie here or there to test, or show a lack of respect for the other person. I get the feeling he doesn't see a future, but I don't work that way.

I don't test instead I look at outside factors, such as location, timing, the future. I tend to miss the lies and the testing. maybe he is testing me because he is unsure and that is why I am thinking about the Cancer.

To be honest I am only thinking about the Cancer because the Aqua has been less than sure and honest with me lately, and hasn't been around.

He has Uranus opposite Venus, and Pluto Square Venus. I have Uranus and Pluto trine Sun.

posted August 24, 2005 03:23 AM              

I tried this once with my Aqua fella--you have to play games with Aquas, I think--get a new interest that consumes all your time. When he comes around, pay him little attention but talk about this new interest alot. Give him a mischeivous look like you have a secret He'll be showering you with attention in no time and has probably already forgotten the card incident.

Being a Scorp, games seem deceptive, but sometime a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do

I know nothing about Cancers...I seem to provoke the shell reaction in most of them..

posted August 24, 2005 09:34 AM              

My thing with Aquas is. It works if you can play the head games in an airy, unassuming way without getting emotional or getting hurt. It also works if you don't require lots of cuddling. Some Aqua men can have a very creepy detached side to their very beings.

When I was young I dated an Aqua for many many years (8 on and off).

I will never forget the time he asked me to come up for the weekend. I thought it was going to be quiet, pleasant, romantic. He ended up "having to work". He worked for a campaign then and we ended up hammering signs in the ground along the New England coastline in spitting rain no less. When I suddenly began crying, he derided me for being emotional.

Man just replaying it in my head makes me feel like crap. I like to analyze things and I like to work at things which is how I ended up in such a relationship for such a long period of time. I must say in hindsight, however, I think a good relationship requires a bit of work and a little analysis not alot of both with a heap of angst on top.

posted August 24, 2005 09:55 AM              

Aquas do get irrationally jealous, but don't feel bad in yourself about it. One way to tackle it is, indeed, to play your own head games with him! It's not nice, it's not sincere, it's not honest. And it's often, if I'm being frank, a pain in the a$$.

My Aqua used to be cuddly, but infrequently, so I got so busy myself that I ended up having less time for him. Bit difficult for a passionate being like me to have to forego actual physical passion...which is one of the reasons why I am now looking elsewhere.

posted August 24, 2005 10:51 AM            

And as far as cuddling goes he was more affectionate then me and I am the women and a Pisces..He could not keep his hands off me in publci in private..

Also we did alot of things around his work he is a cop it was okay but when I was ready to go I broke out in my own car and he had no problems with that.. With Aqua's seems you always have to follow their beat atleast for awhile..

posted August 24, 2005 12:09 PM              

Amen to that MM.

And I may I be as bold to point out that the difference between an evolved mature Aqua and an immature one is that the evolved one can be cuddly; the immature one may use sex as a weapon/head trip and you may find the hand to body contact is pure SEX-ual versus warm and protective cuddles.

posted August 24, 2005 03:43 PM              

His own fault...of course I'd rather have a real man...but when the mood takes one and he decides to be unavailable...He says I'm a "beast" !!!!!

posted August 24, 2005 06:29 PM              

Jealousy is about getting control of the situation, because one doesn't feel comforted or nurtured. But I am very nuturing I think! Only not always physically. The Aqua has been trying to push us to another level physically and we had a fight about it that morning. he must have been jealous for that reason! As if I would go looking elsewhere! So crazy.

Still it's true I do like male attention and welcome it at all times. I don't really know why or even want to change. Aren't there signs that like this?
I am very devoted only I get bored and have to talk to someone.

That description of the Aqua in the rain was hysterical, thank you.

What was really funny is that I went to a psychic about the Aqua at the show, only $10:> and she said, your b/f needs to take you more places, travel, for about six months and then you will KNOW if he's the one.

I thought that was great advice, even if it's not paranormal! I will try and do just that without stressing out. After all b/f 's are said to be fun...
I did tell him what she said and we had a good laugh, he did point out that I never have to pick up a check, and he's hardworking and disciplined all the time. Those are good points.

The cancer isn't calling me, so I called the Aqua and we will have lunch at my work, this way I think he will have more respect for my life. he's only a b/f after all.

Thanks for the support,

posted August 24, 2005 07:51 PM              

I once nearly broke up with my high school b/f because he said a woman on TV was "hot." I flipped out with a famous Aqua snap-temper.

He was a Leo, and it had the side-effect of stroking his ego. He called all his friends to brag.

When word got around people at school made fun of me. I was sooooo embarrassed.

ariestiger: LOL about your jealous husband.

posted August 24, 2005 09:35 PM              

quote:

---

I have to laugh, actually. My Aqua is even jealous of certain instruments of pleasure in my possession... Isn't that the limit? How can one be jealous of a (mostly) inanimate object?

---

posted August 25, 2005 01:31 AM              

Relationships can truly suck sometimes, when it's all about making it work, so that we, that is not me, can be truly free and happy. I vow to never be unhappy all day ever again over someone else who has no future with me. And that future has to be one that is full of love and fun.

Now it's come down to the Cancer and the Aqua
Friday night
Both only want one night, and i have to decide. That's okay because if I say 6pm to the Cancer he will actually show up at 9pm...due to his Taurus lazy moon..and if I say show up at Noon for the Aqua he will show up at 10am.

And it's all in negotiating, if I give up Friday night I want Saturday day to do what I want.

Talk about a job, I could open up a sensual massage business and get paid to do what I do already. I don't know why that makes sense, but I wouldn't have any guilt about it, since very few people actually value feeling happy with another, in the present.

And physically speaking Aquas are really into discipline, as in giving it.
Cancers like to receive it, but it's still not exactly balanced either way for me.

Maybe I ought to go into the sensual massage business, write books, drip candle wax on my lovers, and take photos. And actually receive some kind of emotional validation and investment.

A wise Cancer/Gemini Venus said love without emotional investment was pointless, and that's what he was holding out for. Sounds sweet until you know, that when he said this I WAS emotionally invested and it wasn't enough.

What is emotional investment to a man? Shopping for the Cancer was big, he like to shop together to buy things for the home, together. Sex and love to him were simply things to validate our existence together, not the investment. Seems the sex and love should be the BIGGER investment, but not so even to the most romantic.

Personally I would as a Taurus like to see love and sex elevated to the highest level, and validated. Love can elevate a person higher, if that person believes in love and sex, and men seem to want to crush the romantic in me because they see I show it everywhere I go and it takes me higher. Most men unless they are a bit crazy do not ride high on love and romance, at least not with a woman. They want their WOMAN to be at home, taking care of business.

I will never take care of business again with a man, I will not change diapers.

if any other women want to get together and do the same let me know. I am only partly kidding.
There is a candle wax, and romantic book shop near my home owned by a woman, it's all about how to keep the romance, not a sex shop.

Ought to be more of those, not just in cities.

Sex and love are not dirty!
natasha

posted August 25, 2005 07:43 AM              

So now, rather perversely, he is complaining, and this is just the way it is with p/a men, the goalposts are constantly moved. I never used to be p/a but recently I have started being more p/a towards him, because this is the ONLY method of communication p/as understand. It's no good getting angry with them, you're wasting your energy!!!

Natasha, I found the second paragraph of your last post truly touching. Us Water moons need a lot of TLC.