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Author
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Topic: Aries & hooking up
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CancerGrly19
unregistered
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posted November 07, 2005 08:38 PM
 
Hey about a week ago I hooked up (FYI we did not have sex) with a guy I live by which in general is not the norm for me. I was very attracted to him, and did have a slight crush on him. We agreed that there would be no feelings because I would have expectations...we would basically be friends with benefits. Well the next night I went to talk to him and see how awkward things were. And they were very awkward...To test him I was like you could come by my room later, and he was like I am kinda busy tonight. So in general since then we have been mutually ignoring each other. Although I only do it because I don’t want to seem like I care, and because I am kinda ashamed of what went down, I just feel like a random hookup. We'll walk past each other and not say anything...or even make eye contact. I started dating another guy in the hall, but I do still like him, even in the form of a friend. And he knows I am dating this guy, he saw us be affectionate. He said he never randomly hooks up with people. I guess what I want to know is there anyway we can still be friends at least. Astrologically what can you tell me about the situation or about what type of guy he is. I thought he was nice before all of this. I’m just not sure now. Will his cappy asc not show he cares or has any thoughts at all? Thanks.His placements
asc Cap
sun aries
moon tau
mer pis
ven tau
mars cap
jup pis
sat sag
plu sco
nep cap
uran sag My placements
asc can
sun can in 1st house
moon cap in 7th
mer leo in 2nd
ven tau in 11th
mars can in 1st
jup aqu in 8th
sat sco in 5th
uran sag in 6th
plut sco in 5th
nep cap in 6th IP: Logged |
Lemingtyne
unregistered
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posted November 07, 2005 09:12 PM
Hello,
Well, this guy and I have Capricorn ascendant and Taurus moon in common, but that doesn't mean I can tell you what any guy is thinking. I'm not a guy.
If this is the first time he's ever done something like this, maybe he is still confused about how he feels, maybe he's even hurt if he sees that you're already with someone else? Were you good friends before the hookup? If not, it's ok to just let him be a random hookup so you can both get on with your lives. If you feel like you're losing a good stable friend because you've crossed that line... I've been there. It's tough.
Have been ruminating over Cap asc/ Taurus moon, but can't think of anythiing relevant to say about them. Will post later if I think of something.
Good luck.------------------
Libra Sun, Taurus Moon, Capricorn Rising IP: Logged |
future_uncertain
Knowflake Posts: 193
From:
Registered: May 2009
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posted November 07, 2005 09:15 PM
Based on my limited astrological knowledge, it looks like you should be able to be friends. It seems clear to me by looking at your placements why you would be interested in him.He has a lot of earth and water in his chart, so I would guess that he's not quite as fiery as your average aries guy. He may be slow to come around romantically, which would go against his aries drive to pursue. It sounds like a perplexing situation. Generally if a guy says they don't want you to get emotionally involved, there are good reasons for that and you should listen to him. I think the confusing part is the information that he doesn't generally engage in random hookups. This could indicate he has some interest in you, but has some ambivalence regarding being involved in a healthy, committed relationship. This is something he needs to work out on his own and it would be wise for you to keep some distance (at least emotionally) while he's sorting it out. What I'm more concerned about is your decision to go along with this friends with benefits thing when it seems to make you feel pretty awful. If you want to be friends with him, then by all means, go for it. I would keep the benefits part out of it, though. Who knows? Maybe by being just friends, things could turn into something more. And if not, then you still have a friend. Hmmm... kind of a weird situation, huh? IP: Logged |
Lemingtyne
unregistered
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posted November 07, 2005 10:17 PM
Between the 2 of you there is only 1 planet in an air sign - your Jupiter. Could this be a (lack of) communication issue?
Also, do you know his house placements, specifically if his moon is in the 4th? Sun or moon conj IC?IP: Logged |
future_uncertain
Knowflake Posts: 193
From:
Registered: May 2009
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posted November 07, 2005 11:28 PM
 LemingtyneIP: Logged |
Lauren
unregistered
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posted November 07, 2005 11:48 PM
I have very similar placements to this guy. Aries sun
Cap moon
Pisces Merc
Venus almost Taurus
Mars Capricorn
Jupiter Pisces
and everything else is generational so it's the same for me. I have my asc on the gem/cancer cusp though, which could make a difference. quote:
He said he never randomly hooks up with people. I guess what I want to know is there anyway we can still be friends at least.
I never randomly hook up either. It would be very very weird for me. If I told a friend of mine I randomly hooked up with someone they'd probably think I'm coming down with something like temporary insanity lol or a fever. This isn't for some moral reason. I don't think it's morally wrong for anyone to do this if it makes them happy and comfortable. The reason I wouldn't is that I need personal space, mainly from people I don't know well. I can't deal with the idea of being that close to someone and kissing them or anything physical, if I don't *feel* anything for them and there's no emotional connection there. It would make me feel very uncomfortable to do this. I'm guessing he did like you and felt quite close to you, because otherwise I don't think he would've hooked up with you. You have some squares and oppositions in between your Cancer placements and his Aries Capricorn placements. This could be where the feeling of awkwardness comes from. I think you should say hi and ask him what's going on. Something is a little strange about his behaviour.I think he definitely has a reason. I'm pretty sure he wouldnt've forgotten what happened between you or ignored you by accident..so there's something there that needs to be sorted. I really think you should talk to him about it. Capricorn ascendant can feel intimidated making the first move. Maybe he feels weird to be the one to say hi first, because as I understand it, it's been a while since then. IP: Logged |
Peri
Knowflake Posts: 1848
From: 49N35 34E34
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted November 08, 2005 02:26 AM
Seems that you both like each other more than you want to admit even to yourselves. quote:
I guess what I want to know is there anyway we can still be friends at least.
I dont think so. Not until you are truthful to yourselves. Otherwise you will keep ignoring each other and pretending that nothing is going on. Are you sure you want to be just 'friends'with him? From what I've read, I see that pure friendship is not enough for both of you, so why pretend? There's more than just pure love, pure sex or pure friendship. There's also romance and affection. IP: Logged |
CancerGrly19
unregistered
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posted November 08, 2005 02:44 AM
Well we live in the same building so seeing him is inevitable, I have seen him at random times throughout the week and a lot today and last night. I had met him before that night and something clicked and I thought he was cute but nothing registered. The night we hooked up I was helping him get ready for a party and he took off his glasses and I looked into his eyes and something was there. I ended up flirting with him and being affectionate (like putting my hand on his chest, and head on his shoulder) all night before the party. The thing is I'm not ashamed of what actually went down it’s the fact that would love to be with him again, and I have to face him. I am not the type to hook up with someone I don't have feelings for. I see him now, and its like I still like him. But what am I supposed to say to him. I know he has a predominance of planets in taurus and cap, which I have both of...and were not one's to show our feelings especially cap(especially when we feel threatened or am mad we shut our feelings off and act cold and distant to the other person). I guess what I am asking is the cap rising going to cover any kind of a response or act in a cold way...which is similar to my moon. IP: Logged |
Peri
Knowflake Posts: 1848
From: 49N35 34E34
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted November 08, 2005 03:06 AM
quote:
what I am asking is the cap rising going to cover any kind of a response or act in a cold way...which is similar to my moon.
yes, if he feels threatened or manipulated. I am Cappy rising myself  BUT you are both familiar with this so it is not difficult to recognize what's going on in your hearts! You have great synastry aspects (at least by sign) Cappy ASC and Cancer ASC/Sun, Cappy Moon, Taurus Venus Taurus Moon and Cancer Sun/ASC, Cappy Moon, Taurus Venus Taurus Venus and Cancer Sun/ASC, Cappy Moon,Taurus Venus his Aries Sun squares your Cancer Sun BUT your Sun is in the 1st house so you also possess Arian traits! you both have Venus in Taurus - a very strong compatibility indicator You have all chances to understand and be understood. No need to rush into demostrating your affection and then turning cold if you dont get any reaction, just show him that you are a friend, reliable, stable that you are always there for him. Smile and be nice to him, talk to him, let him know you trust him and can be trusted. Don't rush things and you will both open to each other when you feel comfortable enough.
Good luck  IP: Logged |
CancerGrly19
unregistered
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posted November 15, 2005 02:02 AM
I just talked to him today...and I realized I do actually have feelings for him. I was walking to my dorm and I saw him, and finally I'm like, "are you never going to talk to me? You don't talk to me," and he was like "you don't talk to me." And after we talked about our day, and I told him that I had sprained my ankle. He had a class to get to so he left. So tonight I see him again and I get to talking and he was like how was your day, and just in general stuff. And I'm like, "why were you avoiding me? and he says, "I'm not avoiding you more than anyone else on the hall." I admit it stung...but I did appreactiate his honesty. I also mentioned that I had not seen Jay (my boyfriend) in forever and a day, and he is like how long is forever and a day? Is my having a boyfriend a tie breaker for him...I know that I have both cap and tau and generally it is but for males would it be. What would a male with his combo of aries/tau/cap do to flirt? Thanks.IP: Logged |
Peri
Knowflake Posts: 1848
From: 49N35 34E34
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted November 15, 2005 03:02 AM
You are going to find this out yourself, I am sure 
Just give him time. Be patient and friendly.
But to answer you question (Taurus Sun/Cappy ASC here) I can say that I don't think he is going to be very demontrative of his feelings etc. But he will let you know he likes/loves you when he is comfortable around you.IP: Logged |
delerious
unregistered
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posted November 15, 2005 01:36 PM
I could say I got Aries sun, canc rising (difficult combo !) but the fire + water do tend to balance..... taurus can be a great grounding force,... BUT hardheaded, Cappy's + Aries in my experience have a difficult time.... so I don't know if I've helped any, but as Linda says there's no reason any 2 charts can't coexist if you work at it and learn..... IP: Logged | |
Lindaland
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