posted December 06, 2006 11:10 PM              

For months now, I have been see-sawing. My mind is so crowded with thoughts I don't even know what to say here other than I'd like your thoughts on what influences are happening for me, him, us, anything.

It's like I know the answer but it's almost as if there is some sort of "force" that pulls my thoughts back to memories which keep me from letting go.

I feel exhausted, literally. My hope is that your insights might "click" for me and flip the switch. I had hoped that Uranus going direct on 11/20 would have hastened this process, but here I am writing with the same issue that has plagued me for months.

Any thoughts, good or bad, are welcomed. Thanks in advance,
MAS

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posted December 07, 2006 09:08 PM              

You are truly gifted/talented. Your insights are very validating, thank you.

You mentioned that his psychic energy has been strong since the last of October or that was when I stopped seeing him. Well, I mailed him a "dear john" card/letter on October 31st...he received it and called me the next day Nov 1st and I caved.

He's now living about 2 hours away and he showed up a week later (unexpectedly of course) on Nov 7th. Of course the encounter evolved as the evening progressed. He has repeatedly told me he does not want to lose me. But his persistent erratic contact and deceptions are more than I care to deal with, so on Nov 20th I gathered up all of his belongings (we lived together for several months) and brought them over to his godfather's house with a letter telling him "I'm really sorry, but I can't do this anymore..." He has not called me since.

Earlier this week I was wavering (the one year anniversay of when we met is the end of this month)I wanted to contact him, but then I think, "for what? nothing's changed, what's the point?" There is the most amazing sexual connection between us and I've begun to accept that's about all that is left within the relationship. Not a reason to try and revive anything, but dang it is hypnotic.

I was happy to read that you think I will have my mind "back" within a few days. I do feel MUCH better today, less obsessed, even before I read your post, but he's STILL in there! sigh.

May I ask, what makes you say his energy, though still lingering, is quickly going away? I have been trying to focus on attracting my TRUE love...but the thoughts/energy I'm trying to project into the Universe have been diluted with thoughts of guess who! Again, your words are very comforting.

I have another question, if you or someone else has the time/inclination...Throughout my life my Venus opp Uranus aspect has contributed nothing but heartache. Will there ever be a period of time when I might be relieved of this burden or turn it around somehow? Any advice/suggestions would be so welcome.

posted December 07, 2006 11:14 PM              

I just did a "path and goal" spread and here's what turned up:

Where I Stand Now: The Devil

**Inhibitions, blocks and fears, which once removed release positive energy.

Trapped by my own bondage. Obstacles around me leave me frustrated, but it is up to me to get past the limits and boundaries. This card is marked by dependence, loss of will, failure of good intentions, options may feel as though they are narrowing. Playing with fire, be careful not to get burned. Even in the most restrictive situations, there are still spiritual choices.

Where I Want to Be (my goal): The Empress

**Abundance, fruitfulness, fertility, perhaps marriage or children.

Need to take time for myself. I've been spending too much time nurturing others while neglecting my own personal needs. I deserve the same care and attention I have been giving to my loved ones. It's important to maintain balance between the needs of others and my own equally valid needs.

My Path: The Tower

**Rigid or imprisoning structures need to be torn down and replaced with the new.

Make it clear to myself that my previous strategies were wrong, I've been imprisoned in the "Tower of False Consciousness". My stance is too rigid and narrow or I'm too concerned with security. I must open myself up to the lightning of perception that will free me from my old structures. I need to leave room inside myself for sudden realizations and unusual ideas, even if and particularly when they seem revolutionary to me. I should not mourn for my old concepts when they shatter. I will come to have a new, refreshed stance.

posted December 08, 2006 09:09 PM              

Believe it or not, that was a 3 card reading! I couldn't believe it myself.

Would you consider a go at my chart? Your insights are powerfully accurate. I've been lurking around reading people's responses to your interpretations and I'm more than intrigued. It would mean a lot to me. Let me know, okay?

p.s. my mind continues to "clear" HOORAY!