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Author
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Topic: Aries BF about to get the boot...
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grottochick
unregistered
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posted December 11, 2006 01:47 PM
 
And I have a hundred reasons why, so why the second guessing on my part? Since he moved to be near me (so he says-but I think he just loves the town)he has taken to drinking every night, being a slob, not communicating, and his sexual obsessions are out of control. I finally told him last night that neither of our needs seem to be met, so we should move on...and he seems to not be hearing me. He listened, but had nothing to say...GRRRR!!!!Are my expections of a real relatonship out of whack, or what is wrong with me that I am not running for the hills screaming? Me: 3/21/68, huntsville, al 4:17 am Any and all insight appreciated. Stella IP: Logged |
Azalaksh
Knowflake Posts: 982
From: New Brighton, MN, USA
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 11, 2006 02:00 PM
"He listened, but had nothing to say"...... hmmmm definitely sounds like a communications issue. Not to mention the other handful of undesirable activities you listed (and didn't list). Sounds like you've pretty much made up your mind, but what's holding you back from cutting the tie??Zala IP: Logged |
grottochick
unregistered
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posted December 11, 2006 02:36 PM
What's holding me back? I'm not certain. Lack of self-esteem, fear, and/or the idea that things will get better, and this is just a bad time. I seem to stay in relatonships longer than I want to - my mother says that I expect too much, and need to lower my expectaions of relationships. So, I usually end up staying much longer, until I am past the grieving point of this person not being my partner.IP: Logged |
wilsontc
unregistered
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posted December 12, 2006 12:22 AM
grotto,You have Aries (being, also action) modifying your North node (future goals), so it is YOUR well being in the relationship that is the most important. You also have Libra (relationships) modifying your South node (the past), indicating that when you try to focus too much on the "relationship" and deny what YOU want, you tend to hold yourself back. It sounds like you understand this...and now you know the astrology confirms it!  Moving on, Tim IP: Logged |
subgoin
unregistered
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posted December 12, 2006 08:48 PM
Dear PiscesMaybe he just gt shocked, or was too depressed to hear that. Have you tried using your diplomatic ways to tell him about what you do not like. Not all at once of course IP: Logged |
grottochick
unregistered
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posted December 13, 2006 08:21 AM
Thank you Tim! As to telling him diplomatically...during our 'discussion', I asked him if he was surprised by what I was saying. And he agreed that he wasn't, and realized he hadn't done his share. But, he had no solutions, and seemed to ignored that I was prepared to 'move on'. It has been 3 days now. He hasn't mentioned it since, but has SAID little things to indicate that he is working on things. But I haven't seen much action. Stella Aries IP: Logged |
william
unregistered
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posted December 13, 2006 08:45 PM
hi chick.
you are a hard person to to get along with in the first place.with a chiron/sun conjunction,you are extremely direct in your opinions and needs.sometimes to the point of rudeness.with venus/mars midpoint conjunct your sun you are a very loving and sexual person but the uranus opposition makes your intensity very mercurial and explosive at times.with the mercury/mars midpoint conjunct chiron,you are extremely direct and outspoken in your criticism of relationships.couple all this will the moon square to all these aspects,and it is not surprising that there is so much inconsistancy in your relationships.you are very loving and intelligent,but you are flat out a very radical person.you are constantly checking new things out and growing.it will be difficult to hook up with some one who goes through the same change and with equal intensity that you do.with jupiter on the descendant,it would seemthat you will get into a "stable" relationship.i would look for some one who doesn't complement you,but rather a spirit as wild and indepentent as your are.i guess you get the drunks as your neptune is square to jupiter.
williamIP: Logged |
grottochick
unregistered
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posted December 14, 2006 07:26 PM
William, you aren't kidding about the drunks. And I was raised in a house of relative non-drinkers! As to directness, yes, that is very true, and I have been working on my tact for years...it's much better. This relationship was going to be different. I was going to work through issues, I was going to be truly committed, And I was going to be understanding and patient. Can't say it has worked any differently than before. Perhaps we are just works in progress, or perhaps we will simply learn to embrace our worst flaws. I look forward (I think) to a stable relationship...any hints when that might be possible? IP: Logged |
yourfriendinspirit
unregistered
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posted December 14, 2006 10:48 PM
An Aries
quote:
had nothing to say...
NOTE: this means he's already moved onThis living arrangment is now what's on the table. Do yourself a favor, act quickly! Boot his *** out!
Trust me you'll still be friends whether you like it or not he'll make sure of this -as everyone is his friend
at least in his eyes. One thing I've learned well is that if an Aries man is Hootin' and hollerin' fighting n' screaming "it's all fixable" if he's quiet however... it's over!
Plain n' simple:
Never to be regained again, unfixable, irrepairable, etc.
The Fairy Tale Is Over
He's probably already lined up his options, perhaps even dated a few. My heart goes out to you but more immportantly I wish for you the wisdom and strength to do what you must do to actually take the steps, moving forward that you may in fact be available to enjoy a more rewarding, healthy relationship. Love to you on your path...
 IP: Logged |
grottochick
unregistered
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posted December 15, 2006 12:02 PM
Thank you for your insight. I would agree wholely, except...he has never been (not once in 13 months) and NEVER has had a tantrum. But, as I told him, he is welcome to move in with one of his friends. I will figure out the bills somehow - and unfortunately for him, I have nothing additional to say to him about any of this. Action, not words, are required at this pointIP: Logged |
Gemini Nymph
unregistered
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posted December 15, 2006 12:09 PM
Good for you! Kick him to curb, girl!! No reason why you have to put up with that.  IP: Logged |
aqua inferno
unregistered
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posted December 15, 2006 01:21 PM
Arians are like one of the best listeners - the last two arians I dated never missed a word I said.
Maybe there’s something wrong with him  Good luck with whichever choice you make 
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grottochick
unregistered
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posted December 18, 2006 01:56 PM
Well, I did it yesterday. The entire discussion lasted maybe 15 minutes, and then he left. We barely broached how we were going to handle living arrangements. Neither one of us can afford rent alone, and the lease isn't up until August. I think he may move out anyway, leaving me high and dry, but we'll see. This morning he pretended to sleep until I left the house. This will be interesting, to say the least.IP: Logged | |
Lindaland
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