posted January 04, 2007 01:42 PM              

I'm wondering if the following would be normal behaviour for a cancer moon that is interested in you.

He's a Libra with Cancer Moon and talks about his ex and also went to a cottage for New Year's without telling me, but I didn't make it clear that I wanted to spend it with him. Nor did I ask him why he talks about his ex.. even though he is heartbroken over that incident.

My Capricorn sun, cancer moon friend says he is probably trying to get an emotional reaction from me to see if I care about him, because I have the tendency to suppress my emotional side when I like someone.. and then I get angry when they don't know I like them, haha.

Just wondering if you've had similar experiences, because I can't tell if he is talking about his ex (and doing other similar things) because he's not interested in me, or because he wants a reaction.

She says its a form of emotional manipulation cancer moons use, but it's not meant to be harmful, it's just how they see if someone cares about them.

posted January 04, 2007 01:50 PM            

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My Capricorn sun, cancer moon friend says he is probably trying to get an emotional reaction from me to see if I care about him,

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Ill agree with you. I have known many Cancers and they are big on saying things to get a reaction and then claim they didnt. I am personally a Scorpio moon and i admit to testing people like that. I dont like it but i would throw in information to get a reaction and if I dont get the one i want (ie jealousy) i get hurt and think they dont care about me, but I do it more subtle and less rash than going somwhere without my parner or constantly talking about my ex...i do talk about other guys though just to see wat happens. We are aweful I know. My othe friend is a Gemini Cancer and hes BIIIIIG on this one, bigger than me actually but less subtle so often guilty of overkill.

posted January 04, 2007 02:10 PM              

He talks about the fact that they did have a good relationship at one point, but only up to a point where his ex started acting like a jerk. His ex dates people and then hurts them.. and moves on. So he was sharing his pain that he is dealing with. He told me about the pain like a week after I met him, so I was really appreciative of his honesty.

I am definitely glad he is honest with me, and that he is sharing how he feels.. I definitely think part of it is to see if I care though. I am thinking I should suck it up and tell him straight up that I do care for him, etc, that I'm there for him as he recovers from the ex, but I can't be a therapist either. I want to pursue a relationship.

We've only been casually dating, so I am just getting mixed signals, especially since he is so upset about the ex..

posted January 04, 2007 02:58 PM              

well funnily enough, the only air in my chart is my singleton Moon in Gemini.

posted January 04, 2007 03:28 PM            

As far as emotional manipulation, it's true that cancer and especially cancer moon tend toward emotional manipulation. They can't ask outright for what they want, and they are afraid of rejection, so they tend resort to emotional manipulation.

posted January 04, 2007 04:08 PM            

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They can't ask outright for what they want, and they are afraid of rejection, so they tend resort to emotional manipulation.

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posted January 04, 2007 06:11 PM            

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With a Scorpio moon do you put up a lot of walls??

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Hehe actually the term I use is "electrified fence with rabid pit bulls as guards". But yea I definately do. And Leo ASC are very cool, i know about 5, very awesome. My bf is a
Sun -Gemini
Moon- Capricorn
Asc- Aquarius
Merc- Gemini
Venus- Cancer
Mars- Capricorn
and same outer planets as you Im born in 87

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Unfortunately for them, even when they get what they want, people end up resenting them.

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Very true

Hmm i wonder how would one deal with that. I mean im probably biased because I would be speaking from the pt of someone who does do this. I think just anticipating their feelings would be cool. Definately dont get jealous, dont give in to them, we gotta learn to suck it up. LOL and if you do get jealous just slightly, very very slightly, just minor discomfort so that your not throwing a jealous fit air signs hate that (i know my bf does).

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Because then I'm not showing who I am, I'm hiding behind a mask.

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Yep. It kinda sucks too, not to mention the trouble I get into with my S.O. who gets suspicious when I act that way. ("Why can't you just be up front?")

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I got a double whammy, i cant be upfront becuse of the Scorpio moon fearing of being misunderstood and judged and the rising Libra wishing to not be embarassed of looking like a complete psycho.

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I then asked him why did he care, and he said he didn't. In my book that is a BIG no no.

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YES OMG thats SUCH A NO NO! My bf does this! He insists i like someone, then starts to poke fun at me so i ask why does it matter and hes like ehhhh i dont care. Or i tell him ill go hang out with this other guy he was jealous of before and hes like w/e. When he showed he was jealous i believed he loved me. I mean he didnt flip out but just sat and sulked, that was awesome, now im like heeeeyyyy wat happened? And then i get insecure and assume he doesnt and just get all upset...

posted January 04, 2007 06:37 PM              

It seems very strange to me, as I have never tried to get a reaction out of anyone, as I am more straight forward WHEN I am straight forward. (i blame my scorp rising for being emotionally crazy sometimes)

It is annoying, as I try to please others sometimes and agree to some things just so the conversation is peachy keen. When talking to this friend, however, I definitly have to pay attention, because this cancer says things they MUST know I don't agree with but tries it out on me anyway.

posted January 04, 2007 06:45 PM            

Shirty, if I were you, I wouldn't bother. Really. He is not boyfriend material right now, unless you like playing second best.

posted January 04, 2007 07:33 PM              

The other day I was mentioning something about an ex and my boyfriend stayed real quiet.

I asked him if it bothered him and he said yes so I'm not gonna talk about them anymore.

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posted January 04, 2007 09:26 PM            

quote:

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The other day I was mentioning something about an ex and my boyfriend stayed real quiet.

I asked him if it bothered him and he said yes so I'm not gonna talk about them anymore

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posted January 05, 2007 06:20 AM            

Among the people I've known in my whole life, she's one of the most gifted, but at the same time, the most wasted (wasted as wasting her gift, not in the sense of being an alcoholic or a drug addict- at least I have yet to see those).

I meant she's made her talent destructive because she's chosen to use it that way.

posted January 06, 2007 12:13 PM              

I have a depressing update though. I decided to tell him flat out that I knew he was still heartbroken from his ex, but that I was interested in him.. I said I was there for him if he needed me, etc.

He said he appreciated that, but he doesn't know what he wants right now. But he thinks he's almost over the ex..

anyway that was a hard convo for me, and hard for me to even confront him to get a clear response back.. and I guess I am just going to not put as much into it anymore. Maybe he will change his mind, but I'm not gonna give 100% and then get hurt.

I'm sort of upset that he would have asked me out so many times, and talked to me every day, flirted, etc, all the signs of being interested.. but then turn around and say he doesn't even really want anything right now.

Maybe he is just scared to commit when he's still a bit hurt from before? I dunno, this sucks though.

here's our birth info if anyone wants to have a look:

me:
December 15 1986
8:15pm
Toronto, Ontario, Canada

posted January 06, 2007 12:23 PM            

I know that really sucks. It does. I don't know what to say to you to make you feel better. I wish I knew. Better just let go, let him go his own way, and yourself moving on...

After all, tomorrow, is another day.

Linda said that was typically Aries, but in this case, I find it suitable for Saggis, too. It's a good quote for many of us, actually.

posted January 07, 2007 07:35 AM              

We became good friends...with me secretly yearning for more. and eventually we got together. We made love and I was soo happy until the next morning. He told me he couldnt 'have sex' with somebody he wasnt in love with. It hurt like hell but I still wanted him in my life so I just got over it as best I could.

The next time we met he wanted us to have sex...and I politely declined...'Im not an object you know'. And I didnt budge.
Anyways to cut a long story short, we hooked up and dated for 3 years. a couple of those being long-distance.