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Author
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Topic: Cancer Guy Update - PLEASE Assist!
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sag_girl
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posted February 08, 2007 09:26 AM
 
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thedividedsky
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posted February 08, 2007 09:39 AM
call him...............you did the right thing in telling him what you are feeling, but now he deserves a call. Text msgs just lose some of the emotion, but i understand that may be the reason you did it on a text.
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sinderlou
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posted February 08, 2007 09:46 AM
It sounds like he may be more open to talking to you knowing the real chance of losing you. From the advice I have received, it seems like you have to really do something drastic to get them to understand you want some clarity from them. IP: Logged |
sag_girl
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posted February 08, 2007 09:54 AM
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sinderlou
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posted February 08, 2007 09:59 AM
SagI feel for you, I honestly do and I can relate and I am in a simuliar place right now. I believe you shouldn't push your feelings and do what you think you should do. Gather your thoughts. Weigh out the idea of him being in your life or not. Think of the positive and the negative aspects to your relationship. If you feel like you are going to lose it in front of him right now, take a step back for yourself and get things in order in your mind before you speak to him again. IP: Logged |
sag_girl
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posted February 08, 2007 10:04 AM
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sinderlou
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posted February 08, 2007 10:09 AM
If you love him, I hope it is not the end. It just may be a time to chill and reflect on this for a minute. One thing I know for sure is, as in everything in life, when you want something bad enough, you go for it! If he feels he may lose you, it may shake him into being more direct. IP: Logged |
sag_girl
unregistered
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posted February 08, 2007 11:05 AM
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Seeing Stars 7.21
Knowflake Posts: 137
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted February 08, 2007 11:26 AM
Dont play around with his feelings because your not sure about how you feel... your probably hurting his feelings.. and my first thought with this sag-cancer relationship would be no no... lets face it the incompatibility between sag-can is fairly high... you just wont really understand him and he will be to attached to you... you can tell yourself that its still win win for you but.. he will catch on eventually and will see it probably wont work... so
~Kevin
SUN- Cancer!
MOON- Libra!
ASCENDENT- Virgo! IP: Logged |
silverbells
unregistered
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posted February 08, 2007 12:24 PM
sag_girl I think that was very good what you did. I personally would only call him if I felt comfortable and I knew that I would not cry (I have a history as a private crier as well). I think that the ball is in his court and if he wants to play ball he will retrieve it, call a time out and change the rules to 0ne on One. Otherwise, he can spend that spare time thinking and deciding if it was worth it to play with so much "safety equipment" when in the end, all it got him was on the bench.
I know that I just beat that analogy to death with a sledghammer but it had to be done.
If he wants it, he will come, if he doesn't he won't. If he wants it and is too scared to come, forget about it, he has some growing up to do, and if I may, remind you that you are not his mother and therefore it would be very hard if not impossible to assist him in that and/or damaging to you at this point. That is my opinion based on my experience.*edit*
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...Loneliness makes you strong, only Love makes you free - Michael Franks IP: Logged |
sag_girl
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posted February 08, 2007 12:30 PM
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thedividedsky
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posted February 08, 2007 01:21 PM
Well, I just thought that be calling him, you'd be the one in control saying that you are not afraid to tell him to go to*&*)*)*
But, maybe not.I just find that in a situation like this, control is VERY important. I am over all of my ordeals with cancerman, because I can finally realize, keep it light. Keep it fun. Keep it real. Life is long. People are plenty. Love is abundant. Now is not forever. Enjoy the here and now. Be honest about expectations.(very most important.....especially if they change!!!!!) Live and let live. Que sera sera. my best wishes to you.
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sag_girl
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posted February 08, 2007 02:15 PM
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sag_girl
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posted February 08, 2007 11:13 PM
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silverbells
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posted February 09, 2007 03:21 PM
Hi sag_girl,
I'm sorry that you are so sad. It will get better. You will look back and be happy that you got away.*edit* 
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...Loneliness makes you strong, only Love makes you free - Michael Franks IP: Logged |
sag_girl
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posted February 09, 2007 03:45 PM
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NAM
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posted February 09, 2007 09:28 PM
oh crap! I am in Florida too,and both of mine cancer friends play guitar.
Where in Florida you guys?
I am not sure about golf , is this something he does every once in a while or all the time? how about an age range? mine are in their 33-38's  IP: Logged |
artgirl
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posted February 10, 2007 12:13 AM
i'm so sorry that you are sad now.
but I'm am in a similar position and I am waiting to see what he is up to. I just can't break up and I see no reason to do so after knowing about the cancer dance . they need time to settle in and get in tone with thier feelings about us and deal with themselves and thier fears. if he shows up and tries to make up i would say go for it. I have had my heart broken in the past and i lived through it so you won't die. be brave girl if you think there is something there take the chance. I can't imagine being without my cancer guy now. so i don't know how u did it. but i would have given it more time.IP: Logged |
silverbells
unregistered
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posted February 10, 2007 02:13 PM
sag_girl, *edited like I said*
I will edit this post after you respond because now I am getting paranoid that he will come on and see this.
It's not funny. He knows about this website.NAM, the age range like I said above is mid 20's so we don't have to worry about that one. These guys are causing a bloody uproar  ------------------
...Loneliness makes you strong, only Love makes you free - Michael Franks IP: Logged |
sag_girl
unregistered
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posted February 10, 2007 06:28 PM
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Dulce Luna
Newflake Posts: 7
From: The Asylum, NC
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted February 10, 2007 06:40 PM
This really cracks me up. Does anyone here know about the "6 degrees of Kevin Bacon"? Well, the same thing applies to the state of RI...only its like 2 and 1/2 degrees. Everyone here is connected by atleast two people. We were joking about this in my Western Civ Class yesterday and we thought we were the only state like this. But then this girl who has lived in Florida said that most of Florida is the same way.....they're all connected. So greetings to you guys from RI...LOL.
NAM, that's why the other day when you mentioned the two cancer boys knowing eachother I asked you if you were from RI.
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sag_girl
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posted February 12, 2007 03:19 PM
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NAM
unregistered
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posted February 12, 2007 04:20 PM
It just sounds all too familiar.I have a friend right now that it is not a Cancer but we were talking the other night and he is also in the situation were he doesn't feel like he can provide a life to a woman, so he says until he can he is not going to hook up with anyone seriously; he does have a girl he likes a lot, but he stays away from her, but he also goes out with a bunch of girls ad always stays the night at their houses.So even know he feels he loves this one girl and wants something serious with her, he doesn't want to see her because he can't provide for her , so he sleeps with a bunch of other women.
If I was the girl that he says he is in love with and I would know that he loves me so much I would be thrill to know he wants me and he wants to be better to be able to provide for me, but the moment I know he is sleeping with a bunch of crazy women, then I would be totally turned off.
I know this is not a cancer issue, and I know this is not what you are experiencing but I see this guy, then I hear from you , then I have the other cancer boy I was sleeping with that has a girlfriend which he doesn't really love, I heard almost the same things this boy tells you with this other guy, and although I believe he was really "with me" when he was with me and not just lying, I get totally confused by the actual actions of the male population.
I haven't even think about sleeping with anyone since the last time I was with this guy , which it was like 2 months ago, just two nights ago and ex lover called me and he will be in town for a week in march , that usually means "wild sex night for me" LOL but I am not even thrill with the idea, I don't even want to see this guy thsi way, i mean I like his company but i don't want to be intimate with him..... ahhhhhh *sigh*  I am so confused, and men are suppose to be after real love too? IP: Logged |
thedividedsky
unregistered
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posted February 13, 2007 08:26 AM
i am beginning to think that this "type" of cancer man really just wants a companion. They want to "buddy" around with a woman. NO strings attached. But, they sure ACT like they want more, but I really think this is their way of stringing you along. (okay, that is the ONLY string he has!!)Then, it is up to us females, to realize what we want. Do we want to be pushed and pulled around? Do we want some kind of "playing house" relationship when it is convient to these men? And, if their is another woman, the path is VERY clear for them to satiate their latest infatuation. And chances are, we are all so hooked, when that ends, we'll just crawl back into their arms, and fall for all of their charms again. IP: Logged |
sag_girl
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posted February 13, 2007 08:57 AM
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Lindaland
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