posted August 20, 2007 01:43 AM            

Those were fine for me until about a year ago I discovered that I wanted more emotionally. I want someone to be there when I wake up and all that mushy stuff.

Why does it seem that guys only think I'm prone to want sexual things. Or that I am like this major sl*t when really I just want someone to love me. Is there something in my chart that screams over sexual. Or a challenge for guys to talk too. Thank you.

posted August 20, 2007 02:16 AM            

A few guys might fall by the wayside (the ones who aren't serious), let those go and you'll attract guys more in line with your own goals...also, tell your friends and family what you're looking for and enlist them to help you meet someone. Stay focused on what you DO want. Don't compromise!

posted August 20, 2007 03:17 AM            

One is, you might be a perfectly nice girl who is attractive.. so your typical dik head will say you're a **** out of sexual frustration. This rings true if the guys saying these things, don't actually know you.

In this scenario, if I was in your shoes I'd change the places I hang around.. you most probably won't find your next bf in a club.. not the sort you'd want any way.. with a Capricorn moon

Two is - these guys know the guys you've slept with.. or have heard stories.. is that a possibility? Are these guys in your group of friends? Do they know you?

posted August 20, 2007 11:00 PM            

Try to make a list of your good points and bad points so you figure out where you stand first of all.. Be as honest as you can. As a Cancer you might downplay your own positive qualities a lot so you don't know what you have to offer personality wise (not only looks wise).
Be a bit more self-praising and proud about the person you are lol - (said the Aries girl.. hehe)

Secondly figure out what you actually WANT in a bf.. What sort of person would he be? What would he be interested in? What would you guys talk about? What things would you have in common.. etc
Basically try to be more SET on what you want.. what you don't want.. what things are definitely GOOD in your book.. and what things are complete no nos.. Also what things you could compromise on.

Two things are important in finding a person who is right.. One is - loving yourself exactly as you are.. and Two is - knowing whats best for you (knowing what you want/need). Don't settle for relationships that are not healthy for the sake of being in a relationship.
I know everyone says this but there really are millions of fish in the sea.. why not pick the right fish?

To clarify.. the right fish for you would never ever *ever* in a million bazillion years.. look at you and see you as a sl*t ..

That's part of what would make him the 'right' fish.. do you know what I mean?

:edit: to add..

quote:

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when I am into a guy they seem to only want sex. I'm not sure if it's somthing about me or what.

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posted August 20, 2007 11:14 PM            

I definitely think it's a matter of picking the wrong guys (also, good point - in the wrong places).. because of a lack of skepticism in Cancer.. The facts are more important than what they 'seem' like.

posted August 21, 2007 12:49 PM              

(LOL)

You're probably just around ignorant guys who don't know how to handle the natural sensuality of a woman. You might turn them on so much the whole slutty thing is wishful thinking and projecting their sex drive onto you. They are the ones who have problems being able to connect emotionally and tend to want to have sex. I agree that you probably need to be around older men, though that doesn't always guarantee maturity or quality of character.

posted August 21, 2007 05:49 PM              

quote:

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You say that as if there is something wrong with being slutty!

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That reminds me of a bumper sticker given to me. It reads:

You say I'm a bit** like it's a bad thing.

posted August 22, 2007 12:34 AM              

Generally I dress mildly sexy but it's pretty tame - not lots of flesh on display or anything like that. Showing too much flesh sends out the wrong message and gets all the wrong attention. I've been out for a walk with my boyfriend and his daughter (who's a teenager), and a bunch of young guys yelled at us that we were sl*ts ... let me tell you my bf's daughter is NOT a sl*t (Cancer moon and Pisces rising... emotions come before all else and she's very guarded about boys), and nor does she look like a sl*t . But she is attractive. Most likely, the guys who yelled at us were just mad because they knew underneath that we were too good for them. There was also an occasion where I was just doing stuff in town and two younger guys on the street were so rude to say very loudly, "look at the sl*t !"... I WANTED TO GO BACK AND PUNCH THEM...

posted August 22, 2007 01:04 PM            

Absolutely!

posted August 22, 2007 03:17 PM            

I'm 24, no long term (serious) relationships to speak of. Never been in love. Guys usually are drawn to me b/c of looks, and usually are looking for casual physical relationships. I've even had my guy friends come onto me when they are drunk.

Where do you hang out?

Are you drunk?

Who do you hang out with?

When do you go out?

Do you have a lot of "barriers" up?

I personally have a TON of trust, intimacy and emotional issues... I am extremely guarded and defensive... I am sure men can sense this about me, and probably realize that it'd be a lot of effort to have me as a "girlfriend". And they're right.

Maybe this is the case with you?

Anyway, you're only 22! I'm 24, and I'm not worrying.

posted August 22, 2007 06:25 PM            

Yeah I've never been in love either, and I'm just like you the majority of guys are looking for casual physical relationships.

As far as where I hang out, I'm a typical college student so I hang out with my friends at parties or in our bars. And I do go out at night, and I do drink. Not as much as I used to.

I know for a fact I have barriers up, and I know I'm hard to engage. I do have a LOT of trust, intimacy, and committment problems. Namely I'm afraid of intimacy and committment.