posted September 21, 2007 12:44 AM            

Different planets & signs seem to give people different types of self-destructive personalities. I suppose with Neptune it's escapism. Saturn, fear/delay in pursuing a goal. Pluto, the urge to destroy & start anew.

My way is Uranian. In my chart, I have Uranus in the first house. It's conjunct Mercury & tightly square my Moon. I also have Aquarius on my IC. According to Pullen, Uranus is my most prominent planet. I'd say he's right.

Since a young age, when things have been going very smoothly in a certain area of my life, I've often withdrawn from it. I guess the calmness would bore me & make me start to feel too limited and defined. So I'd withdraw, then fall behind, & come back, enjoying the adrenaline & pressure to make up for what I lost. I was like this in every area...my professional life (school & career) and my private life (relationships of all kinds). I'm still like this, but it's not as strong a part of my personality as it has been in in the past. Certain things--some good, some bad--have brought a stability to my life that I've never experienced before. Not that I was erratic before, but I'd regularly experience a sudden need to escape. The routine would eventually feel dull and artificial, the escape would feel invigorating and real.

This behavior hasn't caused that many problems for me, so I guess it hasn't been self-destructive from an external pov. Professionally & academically, it hasn't hurt me. Privately, well, it has caused some problems. My main motivation to control this part of myself better has been to avoid hurting people. Mostly what Uranus does is give me a frequent urge to begin something new. Now, I try to use it in a positive way by adding new experiences, without neglecting current responsibilities.

posted September 21, 2007 12:57 AM            

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Sun in Libra
Moon in Cancer
Jupiter in Cancer
Venus in Virgo
Mars in Cancer
Ascendant in Cancer

posted September 21, 2007 06:48 AM            

I have Uranus Virgo 11th house opposite my Sun/Chiron in the 5th. I bring a whole new level of meaning to attention deficit disorder! (Add to this My MC/Jupiter conjunction. It squares my Venus Aries and trines Uranus/Pluto.)

Job...has to have a lot of variety. Can't do the office thing.

Relationships...have had a lot of odd and long distance ones.

Friends...quite a variety of people and most a little "off beat."

The down side...I have a very impulsive nature. Sometimes I just HAVE to have or do something (love that Venus Aries) and then lose interest before it's complete...whatever it may be. I may have an idea of something I'd like to do for someone, but then forget about actually taking the steps! Annoying! I have to constantly monitor myself because I do this in "auto pilot" mode, if that makes sense!

posted September 21, 2007 07:55 AM              

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ASC: Virgo

posted September 22, 2007 02:13 AM              

sun square pluto 0'... ouch!

I feel the urge to destroy and re-create myself very often.

Seveneieghtorange you said:
"I do get the urge to start anew every year (to the point that it has become ridiculous) and completely cut off ties with people with no second thought and no turning back either"

YES!! exactly what happens to me.

And also tend to like or do things that are not good for my well being.

posted September 25, 2007 03:02 AM            

seveneightorange - That's a lot of Pluto action in your chart. Pluto is such a powerful planet. It can make destruction appear seductive. This isn't such a bad thing, as long as it also gives you the strength & guidance to rebuild.

posted September 25, 2007 03:06 AM            

librarising - I'm happy for you.

xrarax - Ouch indeed on that exact sun-pluto square. But isn't it such a great feeling when you take hard aspects & make them start working for you instead of against you? in some ways, that process makes me feel like a recovering addict. The pull to use the aspect negatively is so strong & it feels so natural to be that way. But the benefits of resisting are so huge & opens up a whole new life.

posted September 25, 2007 07:56 AM            

I do have a self destruct button - definitely. A lot of people I know have one. I don't press it nearly as often as I used to, but I do "hover" over it a LOT!

Going by your descriptions, my path of self destruction has always and will always be the Uranian one. I look back at the past, before I knew diddly squat about astrology and I see now that my entire life has been painted Uranian. And I am in no doubt that it will continue to feature heavily in my life until I leave this earthly plane.

To start with, my Sun, Chiron and North Node, all reside in the 11th house. I also have an Aquarius moon. And my Uranus in Sagittarius is unaspected. Oh, and did I forget to mention that my Uranus is also a singleton?! Phew!!!

Erraticism, commitment phobia, disappearing acts and bouts of impulsiveness is the name of my game. I've grown out of a lot of this over the years, but the thoughts still pop up a LOT. I guess I'm just used to my Uranian vibe these days - you could say that I'm even a little fond of it! I've lived with it all my life, so I find it more beneficial than detrimental as I grow older because I've learnt to channel the Uranian energy adeptly. I hope to become an expert at it by the time I'm ready to kick the bucket!!! I look back at my younger years and think: "you poor girl - you didn't have a clue what you were doing, did you?!" ;p (Edit to add to: I also had a sh!tload of Uranus transits during my teenage years - what could be worse than an already rebellious teenager having Uranus transits?!)

posted September 25, 2007 08:42 AM            

quote:

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Its not even a question of them being bad to me, its just somehow I would always find a way to put enough distance between myself and the said guy in question at the time that I would wonder why I don't see him anymore or why we stopped being close...even after things could be perfect. After about the bazillionth time this happened, I figured out that the problem was with me. Luckily, I finally recognized that amd am obviously not that bad anymore.

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