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Author
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Topic: Aspects or sign that screams "committment phobe"
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GrlyGirl20
Knowflake Posts: 319
From: USA
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted September 24, 2007 01:10 AM
  
Hey I was wondering what aspects specifically points to someone who is afraid of relationships. I have no problem entering them, but when it starts getting serious...and deeper emotions are expected I usually fake it. My relationships are much like friendships. One example is I'm dating a guy right now...really fun guy he's a libra sun cancer moon with venus in sag and mars in leo...but I have a feeling I have the potential to hurt him. That he may have deeper emotions than I. Also I have a tendency to feel trapped in relationships...like I always wonder if something or someone better is out there.
My question is why am I like this...I'm a cancer...I thought were supposed to love relationships...even the thought of saying "my boyfriend" makes me HIGHLY uncomfortable. I know I feel SUPER deeply and for a SUPER LONG TIME when my feelings are finally aroused...but until then am I destined to be a committment phobe? My placements: 7/3/1985 Born in Bellflower, Ca at 5:34 Am
Asc Can
Sun Can 1st
Moon Cap 7th
Mer Leo 2nd
Ven Tau 11th
Mar Can 1st
Jup Aqu 8th
Nep Cap 6th
Sat Plu 5th
Uran Sag 6th
Plu Sco 5th IP: Logged |
Astralmuse
unregistered
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posted September 24, 2007 05:57 AM
You do have that Capricorn Moon in the house of relationships - and Capricorn just doesn't want to settle if there's a feeling that something better is out there. Your Moon also opposes Mars (emotions really drain energy so they are sometimes avoided altogether) and squares Pluto (wants total control over your emotional life). You have a lovely Venus placement in Taurus and the 11th House and it's trine your Moon. So, it seems to me that your relationship ability is absolutely there and on a very deep level. When you find someone you truly believe "worthy" of your energy (someone whom you think of as a good friend, someone who is well-respected by you and your circle), there won't be any questions about faked emotions or fear of commitment.IP: Logged |
CoralFrequency
Newflake Posts: 0
From:
Registered: Aug 2009
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posted September 24, 2007 06:34 AM
It's not unusual at all. We're both in our early 20s.. most people would feel a bit uneasy about serious relationships. I wouldn't call it commitment phobic though. It's just a matter of preference and what you want in your life. I don't mind pizza but I don't want pizza right now.. I might want a fruit salad at the moment.. That doesn't mean I'm pizza phobic.. Maybe pizza feels too heavy and I have too much on my plate already.. but one day pizza might do just fine.. ya never know. (yes, I do have a Pisces Mercury.. and yes that's why no one knows what I just meant by that.. anyhoooo) Things change in time GrlyGirl - so don't worry about it. IP: Logged |
OMG Jay
unregistered
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posted September 24, 2007 08:40 AM
Sagittarius
Capricorn
AquariusInfluences IP: Logged |
Aria
unregistered
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posted September 24, 2007 09:56 AM
GrlyGirl20, you're a Cancer, right? Read my posting above yours (Gemini Girl - Cancer man) and tell me if any of that sounds familiar.I'm NOT knocking Cancers at all, but I do think that some have commitment discomfort - to varying levels, mind you. All I can say from my perspective is - don't fake it. If you don't feel it, don't fake it! I'm in that situation right now and its extremely painful! Be upfront, don't mislead anyone and speak your mind. There's nothing wrong with enjoying someone's company and letting them know right from the offset that you value their friendship but that's all! IP: Logged |
lalalinda
Moderator Posts: 1120
From: nevada
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted September 24, 2007 10:21 AM
Hello and Welcome Astralmuse 
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willowing3
unregistered
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posted September 24, 2007 11:32 AM
"Also I have a tendency to feel trapped in relationships...like I always wonder if something or someone better is"Hi there, PiscesSun/GeminiMoon/AriesAsc/CAPVENUS. I have the same problem as mentioned above. Is it the moon in Gemini or the Venus in Capricorn? Who knows, but it is something that I am trying to work on. My friend calls it "grass is greener" complex. I need to live in the moment, instead of wondering what would/should be......Another problem I'm working on is to not take someone's current behavior and assign that role to them in the future. E.G. Just because someone might be cranky this moment, today, does not mean they will be cranky for the rest of their lives.... LIVE IN THE NOW, my mantra I'm trying to work on:-) IP: Logged |
marsconjunctmercury
unregistered
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posted September 24, 2007 11:51 AM
Venus in Sag / Gem------------------
4th December 1974 18:00GMT Isle of Wight U.K
marsconjunctmercury@yahoo.co.uk
neutralcruiser@hotmail.co.uk IP: Logged |
LaurieAnn
unregistered
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posted September 24, 2007 03:26 PM
Sun/Venus/Mars/Moon in Sag. or aspects to Uranus.IP: Logged |
Tigerlily
Knowflake Posts: 59
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted September 24, 2007 03:49 PM
My husband is a Capricorn with Aquarius Moon, Capricorn Mercury, and Sagittarius Venus and Mars.
Backstory: We initially met online on my messageboard - I was the webmaster, he was a mod. We started chatting in the staff chatroom, then started chatting by IM, then after a few weeks we moved on to the phone. We spent the next four months talking on the phone for hours each day really getting to know each other. Then finally we met in person. He lived in England - I'm American. I changed my ticket after the first day to prolong what was supposed to be a two week trip - as soon as we met face to face it felt like we had known each other forever and we had picked up where we left off - and I stayed with him for a month. The day after I got back home he asked me to marry him.He was a commitment-phobe before he met me...but when it's really right, it's right. We've been married almost five years now and our commitment to each other just deepens and deepens with each year. I'm a Cancer Sun, Mercury and Mars, with Virgo Moon, Leo Venus and Aquarius Rising. Before I met my husband I was a commitment-phobe myself. When you meet a soulmate, a lot of the issues you might have had with others of the opposite sex simply don't exist with your soulmate because you're truly right for each other. IP: Logged |
Diandra23
unregistered
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posted September 24, 2007 04:21 PM
Tigelilly,What a beautiful and awesome story and its real!!Not a fairy Tale or a movie...Yup i also think that when the right person appears,the fear of commitment also disapear. Thanks for telling us your Story, it sure give us Hope in our personal stories also  I met my bf like you met your husband and it was the same Path like you did with your English man. The only diference is that my Jonnhy doenst see marriage coming so soon, but i have Faith hihihi IP: Logged |
SolarJustice
unregistered
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posted September 24, 2007 06:49 PM
you might want to read about the opposition Venus - Saturn as this is a strong player in your own chart.
-kyle
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yes, im new -please be kind. IP: Logged |
OMG Jay
unregistered
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posted September 24, 2007 10:24 PM
My sister's a Gemini Moon, Capricorn Venus, and Capricorn Sun, Taurus Rising. She's not like that though.
quote:
My husband is a Capricorn with Aquarius Moon, Capricorn Mercury, and Sagittarius Venus and Mars.
Ughh that's my ex boyfriend except he also had an Aqua rising and Gemini Mars. Total nightmare alert. I rather become a lesbian then date a man with that combo again. IP: Logged |
Astralmuse
unregistered
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posted September 25, 2007 01:02 AM
Thanks for the welcome, lalalinda!IP: Logged |
etheric distortion
unregistered
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posted September 25, 2007 01:02 AM
in your chart I would lean towards the yod formed by the sun/mars conjuction inconjuct both sides of your jupiter/uranus sextile..I would think all that Uranus would make you somewhat detached, and restless, always craving change. IP: Logged |
jane
Knowflake Posts: 1277
From:
Registered: Jul 2009
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posted September 25, 2007 01:45 AM
I can relate to a lot of what you wrote. I don't think you're a commitment phobe. I think of what you're experiencing as the integrity of Capricorn. You have your Moon in Cap & Cap on your descendant. Capricorn finds it hard to fake anything. Unless it's the real deal--you're truly in love--a commitment based on anything less will feel a little phony, like you're playing the role of girlfriend. Once a relationship feels fake, you're naturally going to feel trapped b/c you're not being truly yourself. When I was younger, many of my friends seemed to fall in love so easily & frequently. I was never like that. I either fell hard & for a long time or not at all.Your Venus-Saturn opposition would give your Venus some Capricorn tendencies, too. I just noticed that we have reversed Venus and descendant signs--my Venus is in Cap, you have Cap on your dsc; your Venus is in Taurus, I have Taurus on the dsc. No wonder I know where you're coming from.  IP: Logged |
Lindaland
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