posted April 05, 2008 08:57 AM            

But, How do you guide Virgos so that they feel better and do not worry about their Ex?? I have been disappointed with their choices too!! They have high hopes for Aquarius, Gemini, and Sag to return in their lives!!

posted April 05, 2008 10:14 AM              

i'm wondering how these people broke up...was it them who broke off the relationship or their significant other, because that could make the difference in how they feel after the fact.

if the virg was the one to break off the relationship than easier to move on...but if other broke it off with virg...i can see how a virg would have a hard time forgetting especially with an aquarius theres something extremely passionate and hot about a aqua and virg relationship very difficult to get over. i'm in an aqua virg relationship and i cannot get away, i'm entranced.

posted April 05, 2008 11:25 AM            

But there was a guy who rejected me about 6 years ago. I want him to return... so that I can tell him to sod off. I think he is coming back. poor thing.

mblover - most Virgos take rejection personally. Fortunately I come from a sales background, which told me that it's not about me... it's about the "man's" needs that can't be fulfilled, which is very different from, " I can't fulfill his needs"... yes, you can't but you and how many other women?. Lots others.

Most Virgos will go on asking, "Why didn't you love me? blah blah blan... I used to be that Virgo. Then I grew up.

The one's that have stayed in my heart somehow are:

(I don't have their dates of birth to show a chart but..)

Idiot 1 had: Sun Virgo/Moon Leo and Virgo Saturn.

So. His Sun is probably conjunct my Saturn (no chart so no degrees to clarify) and that is a binding aspect. Also, his Saturn is probably conjunct my Virgo Venus, and basically, My Moon is Sextile the Saturn, my Mars, Jupiter, and ASC too.

Idiot 2 had: Cap Sun/ Cap Moon/ Leo Saturn
He is crawling back but this one, I don't want anywhere near me.

and all I know is that Idiot 3 is a Cancer Sun.

So, all these guys aspect my chart quite a bit. So, look at those aspects that indicate endurance in love and maybe that's why they can't let go.

posted April 05, 2008 05:16 PM              

It's hard for us to let things go if we aren't convinced it was a reasonable end. I just let this Scorp go after I traveled to cold, un-diverse, did I say cold--Idaho to only have him be inflicted with the wandering eye right there in front of me--Venus in Leo--I've been in "relations" with him for like 4 years! It took that one trip to let me finally get it...I mean, he takes a soprano intonation when he talks to dogs! Like, Dude! Anyway...And then, as we're driving this car in front of us is swerving--he says the guy is drink--me, with my semi dirty mind, says he's getting a---...Then he says, no, he can drive when that's happening--when **** did it to me! It was that all day everyday....And then I finally got it! He isn't doing anything new, I'm just now hearing it. I loved the emotional distance this talk caused. But since, I was only there for a weekend rendezvous, I need it to be totally about me. I mean, I called him by the name of the Cancer I like....Anyway--when I saw it, I was through. This guy is not for me, not even for vacation *****!

We're not as cut and dry as a lot of other signs when it comes to investing our feelings into something. Once we invest, it has to rationally make sense to let it go. And usually over time, a lot of thought, we can find our way to that rationality.

posted April 06, 2008 05:18 PM            

I have to agree with most of these Virgos above... Once I'm done with someone, I'm done. That's it, game over. I don't put up with crap, and I don't think that most Virgos do. It might take some intense thought and emotional venting to get to that point though, depending on the circumstance.

HOWEVER, that being said, Virgos are really hard on themselves (myself included), and we seem to think that everyone else can see every little flaw like we can, so when we feel rejected, we start going over all those little flaws trying to figure out what it was that we did wrong or what part of us was wrong for that person.

Also, many Virgos are planners, and not only that, but they're also perfectionists or idealists. I've known many other female Virgos especially that have planned out every little detail of their life from birth to death (you think I'm kidding). They will be married by this age, kids by this age, etc. Their perfect spouse will be this height, this weight, make this amount of money, etc. The wedding will be this long, with this many people... It gets tiring to say the least. I think I'm lucky because I have a lot of fire in my chart, so I lean towards the spontaneous instead of the obsessive planning.

A lot of people do this of course, but Virgos are more serious about it. It becomes a problem when they find a person and this person is "THE" person, and come hell or high water, this person will be with them forever... Until the other person feels smothered or feels like he/she has too many ideals pushed on him, or whatever the problem is and they start distancing themselves or they outright reject the Virgo.

Virgos DO get attached, but honestly, I think they get more attached to being in a relationship itself than the actual person, ESPECIALLY if the person is the Virgo's vision of what their mate "should" be. Virgos are very good at putting the relationship itself over the person involved. It's the relationship that's idealized, not necessarily the person (since Virgos are very good at seeing flaws).

Plus, if they do have an itinerary for life, and their planned marriage date is soon approaching, Virgos can trick themselves into thinking this one particular person is the one for them. Oddly, though we are good at seeing through crap, it's been my experience (with myself and other Virgos) that we'll start overlooking flaws and things we should see because we want things to work. In fact, I think many Virgos overcompensate on the overlooking flaws of those we love because we all ARE so critical. So, if a Virgo gets rejected or even if they dump someone for some other usually practical reason, they often still carry this idealism of the person over, and if they don't really go over the reasons why this person isn't in their lives anymore OR if they attribute the cause to themselves and their own flaws (due to insecurity) they won't really get over the person. Because, as we all know, this person was "perfect" for them, even if they really weren't. It's all a matter of perception.

I think the best thing to do with a Virgo in that case, is, as a friend, sit down with them and lay it all out the facts for them so they can make that clean, unemotional break. These are the reasons you guys aren't together, you had a part in it, but so did the other person, etc etc. Virgos *usually* respond well to reason. Bolster their ego a bit, because Virgo's insecurity is a major hurdle in this as well.

Those are just my thoughts... In any case, I hope that helped. Sorry it's kind of wordy.

posted April 06, 2008 07:06 PM              

I never stop thinking about him, if I'm honest I do want him back though I have yet to put my finger on why, and I am always self criticizing.

Someone said that unfinished business is kryptonite to Virgos and that is definitely true for me. I am so able to be the 'ice queen' and cut things off clean if I know where things stand. What I mean is that with a cut and dry relationship no matter how good or bad I can take the end result and all that happened during and tie it up nicely and put it away. Case closed.

When things are not clearly defined or easy for me to categorize I am restless and try to reach those conclusions on my own through incessant over analysing. I'm ok to say that was a good relationship but failed because of x,y, and z reason. Or that was a bad relationship and good riddance it's over.

BUT when it's not so easy or I have things left unsaid, unclear, etc. I have to keep re-hashing until I can square things away in my own mind. Because often we don't get to sit and do this with our ex it's always difficult to put a closure on things if you are just dealing with your own thoughts. I almost wish I could sit this ex down and ask a list of questions knowing I would get an honest answer so I could move on and stop beating myself up over certain things.

I'll put it this way. When I play a video game and advance to the next level without having done everything in the previous one it bugs me. I will go through and do everything even if points aren't earned just so I know I did cross every t and dot every i. I have people saying 'There is nothing behind that door...' or whatever but I can't leave a room without opening every hatch, picking up each pack, etc. (in video games not real life!)

With relationships I like to examine each thing and say ok I can cross this item off my list as I know it was not my fault, out of my control, I couldn't have changed anything, etc. If there is doubt then I will forever obsess in the 'what if...' and the 'I never said/did/explained...'

I'm ok with a relationship ending but not with one failing if that makes sense. They run their course, that's how it goes. But if I feel it wasn't so much that a natural conclusion occured or we were not right but rather it was not executed 'right' then it eats me up and sadly there is no way to time travel and fix our past.

Oh and someone said something about Virgos dealing with the relationship more than the person (I'm paraphrasing terribly) and I do that. The person is sometimes irrelivant because I'm basically living in my own world of what my ideal is and what the perfect man/relationship is and trying to craft that out of us rather than seeing what is there.

posted April 06, 2008 09:37 PM            

I am awaiting more responses. This is a HOT topic because it is important for people to understand how to break-up relationships with Virgo.

posted February 11, 2014 10:40 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by dadoo:
How is it then when the mistake leading to the break-up (like lying or cheating) was done by the Virgo?
Or when the Virgo did the breaking-up then regretted it but too late?
How easy, or difficult, is that to put behind?

---

In my experience when I've ended it, I wasn't the one who made the so-called "mistake".

I have sometimes ended something if I don't feel I'm getting back the same level of feeling. It's a bit heartwrenching at first because you do miss the platonic and fun part of the relationship too, but to me it's not worth torturing yourself over a something when neither of you are on the same page (ie you want more from the relationship and they don't). Who REALLY wants that kind of prolonged heartache?