Posts: 3980
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posted August 31, 2004 12:30 AM         

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I'm talking about relationships. Some couples require a certain amount of time separate from each other, and it varies from couple to couple.

Have you been in a real relationship and have stats to share on that?

Thanks.

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Posts: 23
From: chicago
Registered: Aug 2004

posted August 31, 2004 12:53 PM         

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Going through that right now as a matter of fact. The guy that I am dating requires a lot of space so that means we do not spend a lot of time together. to be honest I like my space somewhat to and I do not have to spend every waking moment with you. Two days a week and a few phone calls during the week and I am fine. I do not think that, that is alot to ask. But what I do realize that when we see each other it is so exciting cause time has gone in between since the last time we have seen each other. Like you said it depends on the individual couple and what they have going on in their lives. I am somewhat busy and I have two boys, so if I wanted to spend all my time with my guy I could not. I think you have to look at stuff all the way around. It should be a balance though.

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Posts: 1664
From: Vancouver USA
Registered: May 2004

posted August 31, 2004 02:55 PM         

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I don't have stats to share on it, but I'll give you a link to our charts if you wanna see...

But... hubby and I have to have time apart. If we're together 24/7 we totally get on each others nerves. BIG TIME.

When we first moved back from Hawaii, he was contracting for the company he worked for over there and worked from home.

We hardly spoke but to bicker... until he got a job outside the house. Then, things were back to normal.

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posted August 31, 2004 05:20 PM         

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So when you are talking about giving space, how long, or how do you go about it?

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From: Portsmouth,UK
Registered: Aug 2003

posted August 31, 2004 05:33 PM         

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AHHHHH!!! SPACE!!! Such a great thing. It seems sometimes that it works for people. I know it works between air signs, as I am one, and have frequently dated them, and having space has always been important. If my Libra and I spend too much time together, we get bored a little, so it's good for us to go out and do our own things, then get together and appreciate each other much more. Plus there's the added bonus of having more things to talk about when you don't share everything (meaning time and experiences). I am definately the more ''need my freedom'' of the two, but going away from each other has loads of advantages. I know for a fact that this relationship would have died if I hadn't gone home to realize what I had here with him, and he feels exactly the same way.

Ghani

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From: chicago
Registered: Aug 2004

posted August 31, 2004 05:36 PM         

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Well if you do not live together it is easier I think. I think that each individual should have their own special activity that they do alone. To me everything does not have to be done with each other. Hanging out with girlfriends and him hanging with the guys is also good. Just simply talk about doing seperate things and do it. Both parties should agree though cause someone might feel like you don't want to be with them. It is not that hard. Like my activities are Kickboxing and Yoga. My guy does basketball and worksout. that is time that we both have to ourselves. Get what I am saying????

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posted August 31, 2004 07:29 PM         

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Round and round and round it goes ...

... where it stops
... nobody knows ...

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From: Vancouver USA
Registered: May 2004

posted September 01, 2004 03:51 AM         

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I need a minimum of a few hours a day with out him. I think it's pretty mutual, although he'd never say such a thing.

Days off are fine. We don't bicker when he's off of work. The break we get from each other while he's at work seems to be plenty. He works 4 10s ... so I have 3 days off with him. One of those days is a family day, the next is MY day, the third is poker day.

When we first got together, we were inseperable. I couldn't think about spending a day without him. Funny how time changes things

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From:
Registered: Jun 2004

posted September 01, 2004 06:10 PM         

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My Leo needs to see me 24/7. For real. He's super possessive. And it doesn't help that his moon is in taurus either.

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posted September 01, 2004 06:23 PM         

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... that's not funny! ...

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From: Vancouver USA
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posted September 02, 2004 12:51 AM         

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not so much

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From: Montreal, Canada
Registered: May 2003

posted September 02, 2004 07:40 AM         

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Moon in Taurus is like that, my ex boyfriend would call every day if he couldn't be there, which was annoying since I couldn't talk and work.

Eventually I just stopped taking his calls since he couldn't listen to what I needed.

Space, maybe see eachother once a week, tops.
That's perfect for me.

Natasha

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posted September 02, 2004 02:33 PM         

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From:
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posted September 02, 2004 03:24 PM         

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Oh my, pisces-girl. I know a Leo-Taurus moon guy and he's super domineering over his partner, who's much younger than him. He's also profoundly bipolar, which doesn't help. He's a long-time and dear friend of my closest pal, and I often have a hard time just being in the room with him, because of his aggressive and exceptionally self-aborbed behavior. My pal, whose a Gem-Cancer cusper with Scorp moon can stand up to his pushy presence and chronic obliviousness towards others better than I can, a wimpy, nervous and hypersensitive Gem with Pisces moon.

Having said all that, this guy's a real charmer, good-looking in a very manly way and exudes confidence and intelligence (even though he's borderline psychotic half the time ).

As for the space issue...lol, I love that AJ qualifies this as about "real" realtionships...I have somewhat conflicting needs. I must have space (with all my air signs, air grand trine, air cardinal singleton, air Mars...heh, I'm essentially an airhead ). My sad, little, easily dejected Pisces moon needs regular -- but not constant - reassurence. But because Pisces-strong peeps run the risk of "losing" themselves and their identity in their partners, I need that space on regular intervals to keep my bearings.

So for me, it's seems to work better if there's short peroids of space (granted I'm speaking of relationships I had about 10 years ago, seeing I've given up dating for the time being. I don't think I've change too much in this sense, though). However, being an incorrigible Gemini nonetheless, very long periods of seperation usually mean I change too much and lose interest in the relationship.

This is very different if it's a Pisces, though. I've found that an interst in a Pisces can survive years of sepreation and even laspes into indifference (Gems usually hold true to the "out of sight, out of mind" adage), so even though I may not miss them much in the time apart, my interest and attraction can be easily and quickly resurrected and revived. This simply isn't the case with any other Sun sign. Ah, we Gems are so fickle...

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From: Kerman, Ca, USA
Registered: Jul 2004

posted September 03, 2004 12:00 AM         

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This thread is so cool. Let's see I'm a sag rising and a sag sun sign w a pisces moon. Its true, the pisces moon does require reassurance. It conflicts with my Fire sense of independence. Add to that a Cancer fiance w a Sag moon and things get um challenging. My cancer doesn't show at all his Archer moon. He likes being with me ALL the time. It gets stressful caz we work together sigh. When I want my space, I tend to get irritated w him which leads to his feeling rejected and climbing into his shell. After working together for a year and living together for 10 months, I'm looking into finding a job elsewhere. The cancer need for constant affection is sometimes too much for the Free Spirit Archer to bear LOL.

D

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posted September 03, 2004 06:22 PM         

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I can't date anymore Sag Suns. Other Sag or 9th House or Jupiter influences are really good for me, but a Sag Sun is always too blunt with my Cancer Moon at some point.

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posted September 03, 2004 08:14 PM         

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Gemini-nymph: Whoa..... bipolar you say? Aggressive and exceptioally self-absorbed behaivor? Charming tho, good looks, exudes confidence and intelligence...borderline psychotic..... You know him too?!? We are definitley talking about the same person...

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posted September 03, 2004 10:50 PM         

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... can I raise my hand too? ...

Wait...

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posted September 03, 2004 10:53 PM         

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From: San Francisco, CA
Registered: Aug 2004

posted September 03, 2004 11:27 PM         

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I've just been through this (marital separation) and I'm about to go through it again (hubby is being deployed to Iraq for 15 months... ugh) and honestly I think with us, absence really does make the heart grow fonder, lol. I have Libra rising and a Cappy moon and hubby is a Pisces sun, Cap rising and Aries moon. Together, we have a lot of power struggles, but apart we are the best of friends, always. In the past he's been very domineering over me and of course, true to my sign I've been impudent and rebellious and it hasn't made for a very good dynamic. But being apart made us realize what we have and when he gets back, we already have an outline for how we're going to make it work. #1 on that list is being nicer to each other (duh). Being with each other everyday it's easy to forget all the niceties you employed when you were dating, lol. The greatest thing though is that we've each realized we are each others very best friend and it's meant a lot to the both of us that we still loved each other even on the brink of divorce.

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posted September 03, 2004 11:52 PM         

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I know!! It's Audrey Hepburn all the way!!

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posted September 03, 2004 11:55 PM         

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Oh wait... I'm confused between Audrey H. or Katherine H. I thought one was a strong Aries. Anyways, she had the right idea in real life, she lived in a different house next to her lover.

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posted September 04, 2004 12:38 AM         

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Hmm, Pisces-girl, I hope we're not talking about the same guy. This one's 53 years old and gay, and has an equally self-absorbed, insanely jealous, and much younger Taurus boyfriend! If it's the same guy, I think you seriously need to reassess the relationship.

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posted September 04, 2004 12:42 AM         

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Yes AJ, that must be Katherine you were thinking of. Audrey was a Tau with Pis moon, so she undoubtedly would have be a bit more possessive of her partners.

And for Sag suns...lolololol...My 1st house Virgo Pluto just wants to slap them. Hard. One of my more recent bosses was Sag...lemme rephrase that: an utterly clueless, brainless Sag. She drove me to tears - seriously. I cried a few times (we Pisces mooners are crybabies...but at least we prefer to cry in private, like in the restroom at work). She was dumb as a wall and completely unorganized (not to mention irresponsible), yet somehow got a raise and got away with treating her employees like dirt. I had to quit - I was a nervous wreck after working there for 4 years with her! So do I think I could handle a realtionship with Sag sun? nooooo, don't think so....

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From:
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posted September 04, 2004 12:43 AM         

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