Posts: 173
From:
Registered: Jun 2004

posted September 04, 2004 01:35 AM         

---

How do you let go of someone, when you know it's not going to work out, but you still love and care about them?

IP: Logged

Posts: 3962
From: Ontario, Canada
Registered: Aug 2003

posted September 04, 2004 03:16 AM         

---

How do you? Good question.. It is usually a matter of necessity and a desire to stop defeating yourself over and over again.. it is always in retrospect that things look clearer, but going through it? How do you stop, when you know between the two of you it can't/won't go anywhere. I think it is a gradual purging of your system. Less a physical need, real desirous need.. physical pain like need to have them be some part of your life. You diminish, possibly hating them for a time, while it wrenches and aches inside, as you begin to see and feel less.. things become more rationalized rather than emotion based.... you begin giving back to you instead of seeking from them. It is a necessary withdrawl, hard as any drug.. but everyone does it at one time or the other. Whatever you find solace in is how you get through it.. whether it is minute by minute or day by day.. one day you will wake up and the pain will be less... the next day it may be worse... until one day again, it isonly a memory, a story. Until then, anything goes. You just find it within you to stop when the time is right. when you need to, when self-preservation kicks in with a mighty yell that you can't ignore.

I don't know. Tell me how? Cuz sometimes I'd like to get over some people. But that's why God/Godess made special people.. to recognize.. and possibly step back after that recognition, to say " You are something special, my soul sees the specialness of your soul ( Namaste) But You are not for me. It pains me, I hate that, but you aren't. I recognize that. Go in peace." Detatch.... Cry.... Yearn. But go in peace.

IP: Logged

Posts: 123
From: London
Registered: Nov 2002

posted September 04, 2004 04:04 AM         

---

By loving yourself for being capable of loving them so much and letting that positive energy return to its rightful home in your own heart and fill you up once again.

As a Pisces, the love you felt for them will always be a fondly smouldering ember because it was real and you no doubt explored the potential horizons with an energised imagination. Just remember that YOU were the one who created that magic.

That is nothing to be sad about. You already know love, you are just searching for the perfect place in the world to illuminate with your own light.

Call it a quest.

Swerve

IP: Logged

Posts: 123
From: Somewhere in San Juan
Registered: Aug 2002

posted September 04, 2004 03:10 PM         

---

Check out the 'Cutting the Silver Cord" thread in this forum. It's a couple of pages back...but it really helped me and I think it can help you too.

IP: Logged

Posts: 166
From: Georgia
Registered: Aug 2003

posted September 04, 2004 10:53 PM         

---

I noticed that one let go another when the right time comes and never before. If you keep returning to them- you may still have unworked karma between you which makes you go back and forth. You may try to let it go but you eventualy find yourself back to him. The time hasn`t come yet for you to part ways. One day you will wake up in the morning feeling nothing but a complete determination and an unspoken confidence with a mind so clear - you know in your heart that you let him go.

IP: Logged

Posts: 119
From:
Registered: Jul 2002

posted September 04, 2004 11:23 PM         

---

Swerve, you bring tears to my eyes. I can truly feel your pain. Have been lighting candles for you and your loved one.

IP: Logged

Posts: 1844
From: Vancouver USA
Registered: May 2004

posted September 04, 2004 11:30 PM         

---

He's Swerviliicous

IP: Logged

Posts: 173
From:
Registered: Jun 2004

posted September 04, 2004 11:35 PM         

---

Thank you Pixel, Swerve, Mercurial, and Jazz. I really needed to hear every single word you guys said. It's just hard.

Pixel--I've tried to go in peace. But he just pours darkness around me. I pray and send him love and peace, even tho I feel like he sold his soul to hurt me. I try to be strong about it, but I realize I'm not being strong, I'm just in denial. Or at least I was. ..It also helps to know someone out there can describle the pain that I feel when I can't express myself due to the tears making my throat tight. (i don't think that last sentence sounds right, but that what it feels like when i cry)

Swerve--Thanks again for your beautiful words. I found some solace in them. You made me feel that I wasn't alone and reminded me that I'm not lost in the darkness.

Mercurialmisfit--I found that thread and read it. THank you, It does help alot.

Jazzebel--We do always end up back together. And then more karma happens. I don't know...because I know that there are so many reasons why it can't work out. But then, I forgive and forgive and forgive. Hmm...perhaps I need to meditate for awhile...

IP: Logged

Posts: 4078
From:
Registered: Nov 2003

posted September 05, 2004 01:50 AM         

---

Would he still be around if he had to work just as hard at forgiving you?

IP: Logged

Posts: 173
From:
Registered: Jun 2004

posted September 05, 2004 11:28 AM         

---

I know, I know....it's a 2-way street. I was thinking about when I was typing that I forgive him, AJ. But I haven't done anything bad to him on purpose for the purpose of hurting him. He has a real bad temper and he's very vindictive. I suppose it's my fault for allowing those things into my life and then complaining about it right? ...Ahh...still more meditating to do....

IP: Logged

Posts: 2101
From: Montreal, Canada
Registered: May 2003

posted September 05, 2004 12:48 PM         

---

Do you enrich his life? Yes!
Does he enrich yours in any way?
Does he say things like,
I need to know you're there for me...
Even though I can't be there for you?

Nurturing yourself is planning on doing something nice, and easy that you deserve

Rescuing yourself is not planning, and having to be saved from the worst possible situation, usually because you deserved it by not planning.

If you nurture yourself you may not have to be rescued by someone else.

As a friend to a Pisces I would say now is a good time to nurture yourself
to keep from rescuing others
and to keep others from rescuing you.

Note when I say You, I don't mean we, they, he, or both of you!

Natasha

IP: Logged

Posts: 4078
From:
Registered: Nov 2003

posted September 05, 2004 05:42 PM         

---

It's like maybe because of my Venus in Virgo Sextile my Neptune - I always wish people would treat each other more because of similarities, than because of differences. Life is majic, surely.

(Plus my Chiron in Pisces)

IP: Logged

Posts: 296
From: new jersey, usa
Registered: Nov 2001

posted September 05, 2004 08:17 PM         

---

Hi Pisces Girl,
I am a Pisces as well and I feel your pain. I know the answer to your question but I never had the courage or the heart to follow it. I held on to the last moment, and made sure that it was I who was hurt instead of the other. I am referring to a Taurus who was once very very dear to me.... That was 3 yrs. ago and I still feel the pain. My heart goes out to you. Love and prayers...

IP: Logged

Posts: 173
From:
Registered: Jun 2004

posted September 07, 2004 02:00 PM         

---

Thank you Natasha. That's very good advice. AJ, yes, life is magic... Quicksilver, thank you for your prayers.

Gosh, things keep getting worse. Last night I didn't sleep until 3:30am-4am. Before, I finally fell asleep, I prayed, and wrote, and cried, and felt my energy buzzing on the top of my head-I think I'll write about that in another thread that I posted... Anyway, I asked for guidance and help and change to myself. The interesting thing was, that when i dreamt, I dreamt that I spoke to this person in his life that's been causing drama for us (she thinks she's doing him good actually) and basically said that we should move past it and let it go and move on with ourselves. I dreamt of forgivness and extending peace to my enemy. I already do that tho, so I'm thinking that maybe God is trying to tell me to do that to the situation with him....or maybe to do it with myself! I don't really se her as my enemy (even tho she basically is) She is also a child of God, so to speak, like me. So, in essesence, we are basically the same. Even tho I don't agree with her "ways," I pray for her. Who am I to judge her path and condenm her? Or have I? But I think that when it comes down to it, the only one that has power over me is God and myself. I think it's me that is the enemy to myself. You are so right Natasha, I need to nuture myself. I need to treat myself the way I treat other people too. (That sounds my chiron in the 1st house issue, am I right?) I'm feeling better already knowflakes This is theraputic ... So, what do you guys think about my prayers, my dream and my interp?

IP: Logged

Posts: 4078
From:
Registered: Nov 2003

posted September 07, 2004 02:12 PM         

---

Well, from someone who has always remembered her dreams, I think you did a fine job of interpreting your dream, and you didn't OVERinterpret it either.

You know, as I was falling asleep last night/this morning, I was remembering probably one of my favorite books. You've heard of the I-Ching. Well, this is based on that, but takes a totally unique approach, it's a workbook. You write in it very briefly every day, but keeping the lessons in mind.

Since I was a little girl, always been horrible at good-bye's, and this workbook helped me through that and many other things. It's another way of looking at the same thing, and the way they compare life to the seasons is so poetic and full of understanding.

So for your time now, I would go back and remember what I learned about Death and Birth. Just as a seed needs to die in order to start a new life. I'm sure you fully understand what I'm saying...

It's that in-between part that is so difficult.

IP: Logged

Posts: 25
From: chicago
Registered: Aug 2004

posted September 08, 2004 11:19 AM         

---

Hey Pisces girl, I know exactly how you might b feeling. I have finally let go of my lil one's dad. We had been going back and forth for 5 yrs. I dropped to my knees and prayed to God to pleas give me strength to let him go, cause he was not going to let me go and he was causing me so much pain. He was doing whatever he wanted to do and still holding on to me. I loved him and I wanted us desperately to be a family had already had an older son and did not make it with his dad, so really wanted this. Part of the reason why I stayed. But finally after so much agony I woke up one morning and said this is it. One of the other ladies mentioned this in their post and my mouth dropped open cause it is so true. I was done. Did not want to be bothered in anyway. And we have a child together. But yes when your time comes to be free you will be. I thought it would never come. I think that if you do not get the lesson whatever it might be it takes longer. Please try to get the lesson cause if you don't move when you are suppose to you might be forced to and that can be so painful.

P.S you want a mate that is going to be everything to you that you are to him. until
you get this man out your heart you can recieve him...

IP: Logged

Posts: 173
From:
Registered: Jun 2004

posted September 09, 2004 02:39 PM         

---

THank you guys

AJ-what is that workbook called?

Mamma Mia-it's funny cuz I told myself the same thing. It's just that, ya know, feel one thing, think a different thing.... Thank you for sharing your experience

IP: Logged

Posts: 4078
From:
Registered: Nov 2003

posted September 09, 2004 02:59 PM         

---

The I-Ching Workbook...

It's beautiful -

IP: Logged