posted December 30, 2004 04:31 PM         

I have somwhat complicated situation and I would be jazzed if anyone could shed any light on the astrology behind this one.

I guess first of all, a bit of background on what's going on...I'm going to be getting divorced from my Taurus hubby in the next few months. It's a long story, and I don't really want to get onto a Taurus bashing fest here, but suffice it to say, Aphrodite's take on Taurus' in the Taurus thread, esp. Taurus w/ a lot of Virgo infl, I found to be spot on. I'm sick of being part of the furniture. While it saddens me that our marriage is ending, I am resigned to its necessity.

And now for the love story:

Once upon a time there was this girl Scorpio, and she was sent to NZ when she was 19 because of a minor run in with the law. She was a good person, but as many know, Scorpios are often inexplicably drawn to the darker side of life. She had little self-esteem and was running with the wrong crowd, so her parents sent her to a place where she would have a chance to get her life order, broaden her horizons, and have some space to find herself. And so Miss Scorpio went to NZ.

When she arrived she met two people who were to always have a profound affect on her life. Mr. Leo and Mr. Sagittarius. The three of them were young, and didn’t have a lot of self-esteem either. They met at a business school, and became fast friends. They were like the three musketeers, they went everywhere together, did everything together, and helped each other to realize their individual values as human beings.

Miss Scorpio fell in love with Mr. Leo at first, but he had a girlfriend, and in order to maintain a friendship she felt was far more important than fulfilling romantic feelings, she squelched those emotions. The feelings finally did dissipate, but later, once Mr. Leo’s relationship had ended, he fell in love with Miss Scorpio. Well Miss Scorpio had a boyfriend at the time – and so it was beginning to seem as if this love was ill-fated. But, finally, months later, when both were single, the shy (yes I said shy) Mr. Leo finally made a move. Their pairing felt to both of them as if they’d come home. However, they were young, and not very good at communication, and somewhat selfish and ignorant to the fact that it does indeed take more than just love to make a relationship last. And so, ill-fated it seems again, the relationship ended, much to both their dismay. But they were able to luckily maintain the friendship, and after their egos and hearts had healed, everything went on as before. Almost.

It appears that, while obvious to everyone around her, Mr. Leo was still very much in love with Miss Scorpio. In retrospect, Miss Scorpio wondered if she were truly clueless, or if she just refused to see because it was easier than acknowledging it and dealing with it. Regardless, instead of making it glaringly clear to Mr. Leo that she did not have feelings like that for him anymore, she did not, and allowed herself to fall back on Mr. Leo when she was in emotional low periods of her life, thus leading Mr. Leo on, and inadvertently toying with his emotions.

The day finally came when Miss Scorpio realized it was time to return to her homeland. Everyone, esp. Mr. Leo, tried in vain to dissuade her from leaving. But this was something she felt she must do, so…she left.

And so Mr. Leo through the kindness and generosity of his father came over to the States to be with Miss Scorpio. But Miss Scorpio didn’t realize, she thought he was just coming over for an extended holiday. The friendship continued as it always has however, and eventually Mr. Leo returned to NZ. His absence would leave a gaping hole in her life, but it would take Miss Scorpio years to realize just how much Mr. Leo meant to her.

And so, Miss Scorpio and Mr. Leo stayed fast friends, keeping in touch regularly, despite both of them moving around quite a bit, he to Australia and she all over the US. She always referred to him as her bestest of friends, no matter how much time and space was between them.

About four years later, after much drama and strife in her life, feeling this empty hole in her life but always unable to put her finger on exactly what it is that’s missing, Miss Scorpio finally realizes what’s missing – Mr. Leo. Life had never been the same since he left. She realized just how much she truly did love Mr. Leo, and how callous and uncaring she had been towards his feelings all those years ago. So, she sat down and wrote him a long letter, explaining just how much she loved him, how much having him in her life meant to her, and she apologized for all the times that she hurt him, disregarded his feelings, and treated him poorly. She told him that she didn’t expect anything from telling him this, for he was living in NZ and she in the US, and neither had any plans nor means to move at that time. But she felt he should know how she felt, and that he deserved an apology.

When he received that letter, he was in a bit of a bad space, having just ended a relationship and feeling very alone, and so his response letter was somewhat cold, and Miss Scorpio could hardly hold it against Mr. Leo…it seemed like karma, and she didn’t expect any less. He did try to apologize for the callousness of the letter at a later date, but she wouldn’t let him apologize because she felt none was in order.

So, Miss Scorpio went on with her life, as did Mr. Leo. Their friendship remained strong, but nothing was ever said again of love. And so Miss Scorpio had resigned herself to having she and Mr. Leo always be two ships that sail around in sight of each other, but never moor at the same time. She got married to a nice, solid Taurus, who was loving, but never lit the fire inside her. She told herself that love and marriage wasn’t about fire, it was about the practical things. She soon came to find that she was dead wrong – it’s about both. But it wasn’t until she got cancer six months after getting married that she realized what is really important in life, important to her anyway.

Miss Scorpio was treated for cancer and recovered, but found herself reevaluating her life and its purpose. Mr. Taurus was quite unkind to Miss Scorpio when she was sick, and the deterioration of their marriage gained momentum. Finally, after feeling alone and empty for a year, Miss Scorpio decided that it was time to let the Pluto compulsion for drastic change to have its way. And so, she began to make plans to return to the one place that always quieted and comforted her heart, NZ.

Finally the day came when it was time to go back to NZ, to make sure being there was what she really wanted. It was also time to go back and see Mr. Leo, whom she hadn’t seen in 12 years.

When she got back to NZ, she stayed with Mr. Leo, and they stayed up late night after night catching up, talking about all the things that happened that they never got closure over, explaining misunderstandings, and reconnecting. It wasn’t long before they realized that their mutual feelings for each other had never gone away. They decided that it was finally time to give their love another go, and so they got together and felt as if they’d both finally come home.

***************************************

And so, if you haven’t guessed it already lol, I’m Miss Scorpio, and I was wondering if anyone could take a look at our charts and give me any insight? I have a lot of experience with Leos (had long term relationships w/ a few, as well as a lot of close guy friends who are Leos), and have actually sworn off them in the past because it’s always just hurt too damned much when it ended. I’m well aware, unfortunately, of all the doom and gloom usually predicted with this pairing, the square issues, etc. I'm actually quite trepidatious about it all because of my past experiences and my knowledge of astrology.

I’ve gone to astro.com and looked at their computer-generated partner chart stuff, but I was hoping maybe someone w/ a broader knowledge than I (which is most everyone here lol) could provide their insight – the stuff I read online, because it’s presented in an aspect by aspect manner, I find difficult to synthesize.

The top is me, bottom is him:

Sun: Scorpio 5
Sun: Leo 1

ASC: Cancer
ASC: Cancer

Moon: Libra 4
Moon: Sagittarius 5

Mercury: Scorpio 5
Mercury: Leo 1

Venus: Scorpio 5
Venus: Cancer 12

Mars: Libra 4
Mars: Virgo 1

Jupiter: Scorpio 5
Jupiter: Sagittarius 5

Saturn: Taurus 11
Saturn: Gemini 11

Uranus: Libra 4
Uranus: Libra 2

Neptune: Scorpio 5
Neptune: Sagittarius 4

Pluto: Virgo 3
Pluto: Libra 2

I can provide a link to charts if that would help. One of the potential problems I see is that our Mercurys are SQ, although it’s at 3.57 degrees, so I would take that to mean that because the aspects aren’t to one degree that it can’t truly be interpreted as a square? I do see in the aspect charts that his ASC is square my moon to one degree, am I to interpret that as his outer self will be in conflict with my emotional self? Gah, it’s so frustrating…I’ve always focused on interpreting birthcharts, not synastry, so I get kinda lost on this stuff.

Any insight to add to the generic stuff that astro.com and the like spits out would be very much appreciated.

posted December 30, 2004 08:43 PM         

Although I do not have any way of telling you about your compatability with Mr. Leo I wanted to let you know that I understand your pain of divorce and the realization that you have always loved another.

After 10 years of marriage, I too am getting a divorce. And I too realized that for the first time I could name the one who I feel incomplete without.

You have given me hope that after all of these years that I too may find "Mr. Cancer" again and once and for all lay my feelings out on the table.

Thank you for sharing your story and I wish you the very best!!!

posted December 31, 2004 07:24 AM         

So glad that you have overcome ur malignancy and still able to maintain a healthy positive attitude!! Way to go girl! Yes, time to rise up like the legendary phoenix that we're famed for.

I reckon love conquers all! So go for it.. whole heartedly.. share the abundant love you both have for each other... its time for both ya ships to dock in the same harbour.... cherish this second chance you've both been given ! Hope you'll have a lovely time ahead!
Take care and God bless.

Alexandra
(p/s i'm still new. Better let the experts digest ur charts. )

posted December 31, 2004 01:02 PM         

Thanks Pixie! I think I'll change "resident expert" to "anyone who knows anything about this", because from where I'm sitting, everyone who knows more than me is an "expert" lol, which is just about everyone who chats about astro on LL I'm not that confidant w/ my knowledge of astro (and when it's this close to home its even more difficult) to put it all together.

"but what I do see is promising to say the least"...oohh, please do tell

awwww thanks Maroon *hugs* We Scorps do just keep getting back up again don't we? It reminds me of the end of the Matrix: Revolutions, when Agent Smith just keeps pummeling Neo, but he just keeps getting back up.

I do see some potential problems, largely in communication, which I chalk up partly to not being around each other much for 12 years (when we used to hang out all the time communicating w/ him was as easy as communicating w/ a sibling you've been close to your whole life), and partly to different communication modes (his Merc in Leo, mine in Scorp).

Please, I welcome comments from anyone, not just the "resident experts".

posted December 31, 2004 01:31 PM         

I had no idea you had to battle cancer. My heart goes out to you!

I wish you could meet at Chatzy again. I miss our conversations.

posted January 03, 2005 10:23 AM         

I would like to see the composite because I am trying to see if you have composite sun square jupiter which indicates separation, since you were separated for so long. You may need separation in your relationships which is hard to see, when you also seek relationships to be complete.

You tend to see things emotionally, as a whole, and you want to find yourself through your relationships, he does want the same, but you have to check to make sure he is getting his space, mentally, and emotionally.

After a divorce, your identity is in question, and so it's hard to pick up the strands of you are again, be patient with yourself, and do not see this relationship as the reason for your divorce, or the reason why you are moving forward. The Leo is your friend to lean on in times of trouble, but he can't be your rock, you will have to find that stability inside yourself at this time in order. If you don't you will feel like running.

Plus during your marriage you built up a wall to keep yourself unhappy and restless, and the energy leftover will affect this new relationship for a while. You will want to talk about it, but it's best to talk to a therapist rather than your Leo, because it can be overwhelming, the feelings of sadness related to leaving a person behind.

Your Leo may feel some guilt, it's normal.
Feeling complete, feeling whole again, coming home, these are all the feelings we have when our lives are changing too, not just about love. Be sure to listen very carefully to all of your Leo's fears and concerns without brushing them aside because you are at home with him. Little details, looking perfection, I know you don't want that anymore, but he may be seeking the best route.

Be patient, and communicative, about your inner thoughts and feelings, not just your past and the present. Do not set goals for now as a couple, but you may want to live together for a while, to truly get to know each other.

Take Care,
Natasha
Taurus/6th
Yes I am the Virgo ruled Taurus, but I have a Cancer Moon/8th house, and Uranus in Libra/10th and 11th, so I know a lot about melding into someone. And I was married to a Libra who treated me like a television.

Good Luck and take care of your health.

posted January 03, 2005 04:06 PM         

Sthenri, here is a link to a composite chart, midpoint method: COMPOSITE
Here's synastry: SYNASTRY
Here's the composite tables: COMPOSITE TABLES
and here are the synastry tables: SYNASTRY TABLES

As for space, he's certainly getting it atm, with 8,000 miles seperating us. And I make a point to allow him to call me, email me, etc, rather than me always jumping on the phone/computer/texting first. I'm fairly independent and like my space, so I do a fairly decent job of giving my loved ones space usually. And you're dead right on one thing: I totally need some separation in my relationships, both friendships and romantic relationships, even if it's a just weekend away, or out w/ different friends/out making new friends, and spending time away from each other.

There are unfortunately plenty of valid reasons to get divorced at this point; I'm going out of my way to not allow my feelings for Mr. Leo to factor into the mix - the divorce had already been decided when I went down to NZ, at this point it's just a matter of when. But I certainly don't want to set myself up to view the relationship as "rescuing" me from my current unhappy situation, because then the pressure to succeed on this new relationship becomes greater as a result, and I think that in and of itself could ruin things.

Alot of your analyses are spot on Sthenri - you're right, at this time I can't lean on Mr. Leo, because it's too close to home for him...I'm sure he doesn't want to hear about the pain I'm feeling as the result of another man/another relationship, even if it is ending.

The whole thing w/ Mr. Leo and I is essentially up in the air atm. We recognize our feelings for each other, but we also realize that there is a practical element to any relationship, and we realize that, while we have stayed in touch, we haven't really BEEN in each other's lives for 12 years...so, better not to set expectations that can't be realized. We've always agreed that no matter what, being able to maintain our friendship is the most important thing.

It's interesting you mention counselling. I realized while I was in NZ that I was going to need to see someone, because I have so many feelings and thoughts about it all, and it ocurred to me that I need some intermediary to help me work it all out in my head/heart...otherwise I'll be still trying to work it out this time next year, when I would rather be focusing on new beginnings, and I don't want past baggage to negatively affect the new. It's so difficult, there are so many details involved in executing an international relocation, that I often don't have time to stop and look at the details of how I'm feeling about it all...

Your insights are great Sthenri...and I didn't realize you had been married before. I also didn't realize that Libras could be like that, although I guess w/ all the astrological combos possible in a natal chart, anything is possible...if you don't mind me asking, how long ago was your divorce? How did you deal with it? If you'd prefer to chat privately, I'd love to hear from you, I posted my email to IrishEyes further up in this thread, please do drop me a line.

posted January 03, 2005 04:23 PM         

His Ascendant in Her 1st House
Her Ascendant in His 12th House
Aspects (+/- 1 degree):
His Cancer Asc SQ her Libra Moon 1°
His Cancer Asc TR her Scorpio Venus .34°
His Cancer Asc Q her Libra Mars .45°
Her Cancer Asc SQ his Libra Uranus .35°
Her Cancer Asc Qx his Sagittarius Moon .48°

His Sun in Her 2nd House
Her Sun in His 3rd House
Aspects (+/- 1 degree):
His Leo Sun SemSQ to her Libra Uranus .01°

His Moon in her 6th House
Her Moon in his 3rd House
Aspects (+/- 1 degree):
His Sagittarius Moon SemSx her Scorpio Jupiter .11°
Her Libra Moon Q to his Leo Mercury .50°

His Mercury in her 2nd House
Her Mercury in his 3rd House
Aspects (+/- 1 degree):
His Leo Mercury Sx Her Libra Uranus .19°

His Cancer Venus in Her 12th House
Her Scorpio Venus in His 4th House
Aspects (+/- 1 degree):
His Cancer Venus SQ her Libra Uranus .28°

His Virgo Mars in her 3rd House
Her Libra Mars in his 2nd House
Aspects (+/- 1 degree):
His Virgo Mars Q her Scorpio Jupiter .18°

His Sagittarius Jupiter in Her 6th House
Her Scorpio Jupiter in His 3rd House
Aspects (+/- 1 degree):
His Sagittarius Jupiter SemSQ her Scorpio Jupiter .29°
His Sagittarius Jupiter SQ her Virgo Pluto .02°
Her Scorpio Jupiter SemSQ his Sagittarius Jupiter .29°

His Gemini Saturn in Her 12th House
Her Taurus Saturn in His 10th House
No Aspects +/- 1 degree

His Libra Uranus in her 4th House
Her Libra Uranus in his 2nd House
Aspects (+/- 1 degree):
His Libra Uranus SemSq her Scorpio Neptune .54°

His Neptune in Her 5th House
Her Neptune in His 4th House
Aspects (+/- 1 degree):
Her Scorpio Neptune Sx his Libra Pluto .52°

His Pluto in Her 4th House
Her Pluto in His 2nd House
Aspects (+/- 1 degree):
See Above

posted January 03, 2005 08:05 PM         

I am a complete novice when it comes to charts, but I can say this, I truly hope it all works out for you. I hope the romantic notion that such a thing could happen is not dead to the world...

.... obviously, I still hold a torch for a certain Mr.....

With all the luck and love in the world, my dear.