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Author Topic:   No soulmate
Kat
Knowflake

Posts: 446
From: Cleveland, Ohio
Registered: Jan 2003

posted May 25, 2005 06:33 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Kat     Edit/Delete Message
Here's a new one...
How do you let go of the idea of finding a soulmate or a life partner? At this point in time I'm hitting 42, unmarried and it just doesn't look like I'll ever find someone to share my life with or get married. Part of me says that's OK I've got lots of freedom and I'm truly grateful for it, while the other part of me has this hole... Basically, my astrological chart, my intuition, even the way I'm currently living my life - all tell me I'm going to be single for the rest of my life.

So... how do you let go of a dream, a desire?
(and please no "It will happen when you least expect it blah blah blah..)

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future_uncertain
Knowflake

Posts: 1278
From: ohio
Registered: Aug 2004

posted May 25, 2005 08:50 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for future_uncertain     Edit/Delete Message
As long as you're living and breathing, and you have a dream or desire, then I see no reason for you to have to give that up. It sounds to me like maybe you don't really want to give it up anyway; perhaps you only feel discouraged.

And besides-- let's say you did give up this idea and you did meet someone, what would you say? "This would have been great if it had happened last week, but I've quit loving."

Of course not! The point is that I don't think whether or not to love someone in the future is necessarily a choice. You can stop looking if you're currently looking. You can even stop dating if you're dating. But if you meet someone and there's something there, then I don't think love is something that is easily denied.

However, if you've decided that you really do want to spend the rest of your life with the marvelous company of yourself, then so be it! Ain't nuthin' wrong with that.

But no need to give up on the dream if that is what your heart truly desires.

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AcousticGod
Knowflake

Posts: 823
From: Pleasanton, CA, USA
Registered: May 2005

posted May 26, 2005 05:40 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for AcousticGod     Edit/Delete Message
I'm a guy, and when I think like that I always think of Michael Douglas and Katherine Zeta Jones.

I don't know who your female role model could be.

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shop22much
Knowflake

Posts: 49
From: cali
Registered: Apr 2005

posted May 26, 2005 05:58 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for shop22much     Edit/Delete Message
when I think the possibity of what youre going through, i think of the strong women characters on Sex and the City, and I think also maybe sometimesyou dont get married, you dont have the dream guy in the dream in the dream world, and thats heart crushing enough to most,
I wont say it'll happen eventually because who knows maybe it wont, and if it doesnt, maybe you will in your next life, maybe you had so much happiness in your past life and thats the reasoning for being alone now, I dont know if you believe in after life, etc but I do, theres a great book about past lives by bruce goldberg(i believe?) it explains how you are in the life are usually because the way you were in a past life,
I think personally I didnt have much love in a past life, so thats why I LOVE being in love,though ive been in love once.
marriage doesnt equal content, not everyone marries, dont let society choose the right time for you, let the right time choose itself!!
soulmates..just because you meet a soulmate doesnt mean youll be with them for the rest of your lives, which is really complete BS,
ive only met a few people who were friends and 1 lover who i believe are soulmates to me, though the friends thing usually stayed platonic...
It's when youre content in everything, that everything falls into place...okay i know ive probably havent been much help, but i hope ive made some kind of difference...*HUGS*

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headintheclouds
Knowflake

Posts: 17
From: San Francisco, CA
Registered: Aug 2002

posted July 07, 2005 07:30 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for headintheclouds     Edit/Delete Message
I know how you feel. I've had that feeling since childhood!! And who knows, maybe I'll never find a life partner either! What keeps me optimistic, though, is my mother. After years and years of struggle (both with men and her inner struggles) she found her life partner at 50. I believe, from observing her life, for my whole life, that she had some sort of inner transformation happen in order for a good man to be attracted to HER. It's like, whatever needed to change, changed--and then HE appeared.

I don't know what your circumstance is, but seeing my mom progress in that area of her life gives me hope (and it would give you hope too if you knew her!).

Wishing you lots of love, Camilla

PS: I didn't know that something in our chart revealed if we'd have a partner or not.

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Svetlana
Knowflake

Posts: 10
From: USA
Registered: Jul 2005

posted July 08, 2005 12:41 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Svetlana     Edit/Delete Message
"how do you let go of a dream, a desire?"

I'd say to get rid of a disire, just find yourself a good looking lover and sutisfy it Eventually it'll go away, like everything familiar. I don't know if I'd ever encourage anyone to let go of a dream. Dream on and Good luck!

------------------
You can't lead a cavalry charge if you think you look funny on a horse.
J. Peers

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