posted June 12, 2005 07:09 PM         

So basically at the moment i feel like crap cos i keep on thinking about seeing him on saturday and thinking maybe i should have gone up to him after he made an effort to come and speak to me, even though we didnt get to speak. In no way do i want him to feel rejected, but at the same time I have no way of measuring the situation cos i dont know where his head is at. He obviously wants me, and i cant be just a sexual conquest or he would have come back much sooner than this....man my head is working over time....all over shadowed by the feelings of not being good enough, and not being worthy of someone loving me anyways! Gets tiresome ah.

I remember your post a while back about your virgo, and from memory it was this frustrating for you too. Is it worth the wait? or should i just forget about him (kind of hard when he lives next door to me!!!) anyway, that's my speel for the day. I wish this guy would just get proactive and do something...how hard can it be for a virgo guy to phone (now he has my number) or just walk to my place and say HI!!!!

posted June 12, 2005 09:02 PM         

If I understand you correctly, you're saying that you've taken the wait and see approach, but it's leaving you feeling a little unsure about where you stand with him, right?

I might have missed a post somewhere... you said something about Saturday night? Maybe if you could update me, I could help you a little better.

I'd love to talk to you more about your situation. Give me some of the details and we'll be on our way!

posted June 12, 2005 10:44 PM         

Is this a Virgo trait, lack of self assurance, or is it being guarded? wanting it to be a private moment or something?

what do i know, my heart has totally takin over now, head cant get a look in edge wise!!

posted June 12, 2005 11:14 PM         

Oh... and where to start! I could give you lots of input on Virgos. I'm no astrological expert, but I've got lots of Virgos in my lfe. And there are more than a few gals around Lindaland who have their hearts set on these mystifying Virgo boys!

I'll try to answer your Virgo questions one by one:

*Is this a Virgo trait, lack of self assurance, or is it being guarded

Virgos are known to be a highly critical sign. They don't intend to be cruelly critical, they just can't help but notice flaws,not only in others, but in themselves, too. They can be guarded with these things because Virgos have a thing about perfection. They know they're not perfect, but it would almost break their hearts to know that someone else knows this, too. Unlike some signs, the Virgo need for perfection is not an ego driven thing... to me it seems more like they're afraid if someone knows their flaws, they would not be worthy of being loved. And it can be difficult to overcome this.

So I would say that they can lack self-assurance... mainly because they are afraid of not living up to expectations. Unfortunately, the expectations they set upon themselves generally tend to exceed the expectations others have of them. Virgo is the sign of service, and if they love you, they really do want to provide for you in every way.

They aren't generally outwardly passionate. I know from hard experience (being an uber-passionate girl myself) that they can leave you feeling a little cold when you want to sweep them up in the enthusiasm of your affair and they just smile politely. But inside they can be very passionate. It just takes a looooong time for them to get to that point. But in the moments they do, it is so incredibly worth it. This is probably the biggest problem I have in my own relationship, though... this lack of fiery passion. It's there, it's just hard to reach sometimes.

But if they love you, they really love you. They are extremely loyal once they have given their hearts. But before they do this, they will have to know that it's a good investment. Virgo's aren't disposed to taking huge risks in love.

*Is it worth the wait?

Well, that is up to you and what you can endure. I've been with my Virgo for over a year and I'm still waiting to learn the answer to this question. It can be hard if you're an impatient person or if you need a lot of emotional contact to sustain a relationship. I'm not saying it's impossible... I'm both of these things and we're still moving forward. But like I said, I don't yet have a difinitive answer.

Personally, I think Virgos can be very complex. And it could be because I'm a Sag and this sign squares my own. If you have a copy of Linda Goodman's Sun Signs, you should really read the Virgo Man chapter. If you don't have the book, the chapter is available online, and if you need me to, I can give you a link. But I recommend you purchase the book if you haven't already because it's a worthwhile investment. I've gone through three copies myself!

This is just general information. If you'd like further info on any of this, just let me know. I also want to remind you that these are just my own experiences combined with information I've read that I've found to be true. I don't want to generalize too much, or come across too bold... I don't pronounce myself an expert. But I'm happy to share with you any information I have.

Looking forward to continuing this discussion!

posted June 12, 2005 11:30 PM         

I would love to read the virgo man thing on line, i used to own the book, lent it never got it back. Would you mind posting the link....

MMMM he is totally passionate, and i mean totally!

I guess i feel suspended, cos I dont know what he is going to do, there were no lemon incidences this weekend, but i did notice he was still at home at 10pm on sat night which is kind of unheard of he is usually out with his rugby mates...and i had a house full of friends and family so i couldnt do anything about it!!!!!

What would be the next step do you think? I will not pursue him, i already did enough with the note...but i know i will hear from him....

posted June 12, 2005 11:38 PM         

As far as the cusp thing goes, I don't know how significant that it. I know some people feel that being born on the cusp makes you kind of two signs in one. I think most astrologers believe that you're either one or the other and there is no inbetween.

That's great news that he's so passionate. My guy has an Aries moon and lots of placements in Libra which helps. At first he seemed very passionate. As the relationship grew deeper, he became more Virgo-like, which really threw me off. He actually is very passionate, just not one to run away from his feelings. (Aries moon gave him that drive to pursue ardently though!)

posted June 12, 2005 11:46 PM         

me: 28 October 1969 2.30pm Hastings, NZ
Him: 23 August 1981.....NZ

I am not usually this neurotic, seeing as i dont usually let men in that close, i think this is kind of getting to me, and cos i can hear him all the time living right next door to me!!! Do you think he will make a move soon, I have this butterfly feeling in my gut that it is real close....

I know there is a big age gap, but my best female friend is 22, and i have friends of all ages, i love people and i dont care too much about age.

posted June 12, 2005 11:54 PM         

I'll take some time and plug your info into astro.com and see what I come up with.

From the way it sounds, he seems to be into you, too. I think that keeping himself within sight when you're around is a good sign. Virgos can be subtle. For the most part, if he were not interested, you would know. Most of the Virgos I know won't even give a girl the time of day if they're not interested, and if they're only interested in one thing, they're not likely to play games so much as come right out and say so.

Keeping my fingers crossed for you! This sounds exciting. I still can't get over the lemon thing. I love it to pieces!

Oh! And did it take a while for us to get together? Yeah. We first met last February and we seemed to have a good, friendly vibe going on. I had a boyfriend at the time, so I tried (unsuccessfully) not to think too much about it. We didn't get together until May, but he liked me that whole time. I just never knew.

Again, it's that subtlety thing... usually slips below my radar. But he would make himself visible when I was around. He was never affectionate, but he was just always there if you know what I mean.

Makes me wonder... is there any other guy in your life that Mr. Virgo may be aware of? If they think you may be involved, evena little bit, they're not likely to interfere.

posted June 13, 2005 12:08 AM         

This is a toughie, then. You said he was really passionate, which leads me to believe that maybe you do have a Leo on your hands. If you have any way of finding out what time he was born that would be a good thing. Of course, how do you go about asking someone something like that anyway?

posted June 13, 2005 02:35 PM         

I was just flipping through a book I have here at home and I found some info on Leo/Virgo cusp:

Those born on the L/V cusp are an interesting blend of introvert and extrovert. L/V's combine the practical, earthy qualities of Virgo with the more intuitive, fiery traits of Leo, producing quietly inspired individuals who keep their light within. They tend to conceal the truth about themselves and not showtheir real inner selves until they get where they are headed, socially or professionally. But though they may hide certain personal qualities or facts about themselves for years, their inner flamboyance will break out periodically. the more thy try to h ide, the more the world seems to take notice of them. L/V's use information, whether concealing or revealing it, as a tool. Usually it is information they themselves have gathered. Those born on (this cusp) are often outstanding oveservers and judges of character. Further, they are often good at recording their impressions in thought or word. Others often come to depend on their memory, judgment and objectivity.

L/V's do not easily show their passion and affection, but when they do they are dependable and reliable friends. People who like mysteries and detective work will like L/V's-- although they do not deeply need appreciation, kudos or flattery, they cry out for understanding. Trust is a big issue-- they must be able to trust their friends and lovers to keep their secrets and be faithful. Those who continue to love them even after they fully reveal themselves become lifelong friends and partners.

posted June 13, 2005 05:26 PM         

You're a sweetie thanks for that. It all reads very true of him. He is an artist and his expression on canvas is amazing. In New Zealand the first people to ever be here were the Maori, I guess in America you guys had the Indians, anyway he is part Maori and very into his culture which I love and am trying to learn more about.

I went to one of his exhibitions last year and all but one of his paintings sold, he is very talented. The whole flamboyance thing is there, but not in a big way, he just gets really really loud around his mates. I have sensed the last couple of weeks he is going through a huge transition. And it almost feels like he's finding his place in life and he feels more settled!

I really appreciate you taking the time to look that up for me, resources are pretty limited in the community where i live.
www.whangamata.co.nz is the site for the town i live in. Population 4000! take a look.

posted June 13, 2005 07:10 PM         

Yep letting something unfold in its own time is kind of hard for me, being a scorpio and all but this time right in the pit of my soul i know its what i have to do. I know for sure i will see him again on the 2nd of July cos that is when the 6th graders (11-12yr old) play again at home! so i will be down at the rugby grounds! fingers crossed i see him before then but hey, life works in mysterious ways.

Future, its ok to let love in, all the while remembering that people are human and stuff up and it is totally enivitable that you are going to get hurt, no one ever means to hurt you but cos of this things called humaness it happens. that is how we grow i guess. I have had some terrible abuse in my life when i was younger, then when i was modelling in my teens and early 20's totally exploited and used by men involved in that industry and it took a long time to work through it (still doing it i guess) what i am trying to say is, this is an amazing journey we are on, along the way a few bumps occur, we fall over, we get a scrape, we get a scar, which to me is like a little reminder of what one can overcome, but i truly believe that my future has no room for my past. It has moulded and shaped me into the person i am today, so i am turning it around. Thankful even for the experiences, because of them i have a different outlook on humanity, hurting people hurt people. I dont know where all that just came from and i could go on, but i have to get back to work.

You are a beautiful beautiful person, and for someone else to truly love you, you have to accept and love yourself first. I know you can do it future.

posted June 14, 2005 01:56 AM         

Things have improved for me greatly in the last six months or so. Of course we're talking about overcoming a pattern that has existed for 28 years... but like you said, "I'm on my way!"