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Author
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Topic: My Saturn Return is coming... HELP!!! Any advice?
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steelrose
Knowflake Posts: 801
From: Spain
Registered: Sep 2004
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posted July 03, 2005 05:14 PM
 
Hi guys,My life is wandering at the moment... I’m starting to feel this existencial anguish, kind of “What the hell am I doing with my life?”… I will be 28 this September… The big 30 is coming and I’m a bit uneasy about it… I have recently learnt that this age gap (28-30) is the first Saturn return, when Saturn comes back to your natal position… Saturn goes into Leo in about 10 days and even when Saturn won’t exactly conjunct its natal position untin June next year, I have already started to feel this way… There is something in the air… Most people around me, when they start feeling that way about this, they get married or have a child… But my personal life is a complete mess at the moment… Just returned from abroad, starting to find a place for myself in my new world, fighting for independence in a family-oriented culture, no boyfriend, recent emotional turmoil that ended in a failed relationship and an ongoing disappointment with my actual love interest… I’m a abit disoriented to be fair… Saturn forces us to reconsider our life and decide what we really want… I know what I want. I want to find him, that him I’ve been looking for my whole life… I want a family… And I want a job that allows me to contribute with my very best asset, my clear mind… I want to see the world… I can’t do anything but wait to see if I find the one… I actually think I have but he seems reluctant to go for it, which makes me doubt… The issue is, trying to do something about the aspects I can control (work), I may be mining my oportunities to find the man I’m looking for… I have been offered a promising position at work… I couldn’t say no… It’s all I always wanted… Or was it? It involves going to work abroad for at least a year from next summer… I already spent 4 years abroad and I know how lonely it is… It never did nothing for my emotional happiness… However, as I’m on my own anyway, travelling abroad and a fulfilling professional life is the only thing that can give my life some kind of purpose… That’s the other half of my dream… But I’m thinking, that maybe when I’m back from my adventure, I will be at the same position than now, alone, but a few years older… Saturn is driving me nuts!!!!!!! I’ve been feeling so trapped recently… I really fancy going abroad for work… That will let me breathe again… Staying here on my own appears is such a gloomy possibility… I would only renounce to that oportunity if I had a partner, the other half of the dream is more important… but I don’t have that option today… What tortures me is that I may be ruining my chances to have him because I’m running away from my terror of monotony… If I go, which I have already promised to my boss I will, I may be losing my only chance with that old flame… But he is not reacting!!!! I can’t base my life decisions on ilusions or supositions… I could be ruining my chance to be professionaly happy in exchange for nothing… I don’t know what is my lesson… I’m too confused…
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Tranquil Poet
Knowflake Posts: 1360
From: New York City
Registered: Apr 2005
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posted July 03, 2005 06:33 PM
My cappys saturn return is coming also. Makes me pretty nervous. His saturn is in leo and in the 5th house.Post this in the astrology area. You will get some responses.
http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum1/HTML/005833.html
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Gemini sun, Cancer rising, Taurus moon IP: Logged |
Taurus80
Knowflake Posts: 636
From:
Registered: May 2005
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posted July 03, 2005 10:14 PM
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future_uncertain
Knowflake Posts: 2661
From: ohio
Registered: Aug 2004
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posted July 04, 2005 12:18 AM
Join the club, sweetiecakes!  Mine will be next August... Glad you posted this topic. I'll be looking forward to the replies.  IP: Logged |
AcousticGod
Knowflake Posts: 9121
From: Pleasanton, CA, USA
Registered: May 2005
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posted July 04, 2005 03:10 AM
Bah...just relax and let time pass. I'm a Cap, so perhaps I've been through this before. Just accept everything. You're growing. Consider this your next puberty. It only seems like a major event at the moment. Embrace it. Let it happen and be glad. Do not try to resist, it is only natural. Think about that which is truly important...such as your biological clock. What is it telling you? Don't stress. This will be the start of something beautiful.IP: Logged |
GemStar
Knowflake Posts: 944
From: USA
Registered: Jul 2004
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posted July 04, 2005 11:37 AM
Heyyyyy Steel! Why are you soooo worried? Actually...during my Saturn Return, I had tons of events transpire...moved across the country, met the guy I would marry and married, changed careers...It felt like new pages in my Book of Life!Google 'Saturn Return' and see what comes up... Just hang there with no worries...everything works out as it should. I know...easier said than done. I agree 100%!! Try and relax...really good things happen during a return-just you relax and see! Deep breaths....deep breaths...mas vino blanco y tinto...deep gulps...ha,ha....  Take care Steel! 
GemStar IP: Logged |
steelrose
Knowflake Posts: 801
From: Spain
Registered: Sep 2004
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posted July 04, 2005 02:57 PM
Hi people!!! Thanks for replying!Tranquil, I’ll follow your advice and post this in the Astrology area… I know less people over there so I thought I’ll get a better chance of a reply here… But you are right, the appropriate place for this is in there… The experts go and surf in that forum more often… Thanks Taurus80! May I ask you… What has your friend done? Gone for the nice job??? Thinking about it I don’t have another choice… That is the choice… I’m sure I will regret loosing that special oportunity just out of fear of being left alone… You are right, what is meant to be, will be… So I shouldn’t worry for that guy… Hi my dear Future!!! You too??? How are you feeling your Saturn return? How are you dealing with it? Have you got to an existencial crossroads? Thanks Acoustic!!! You are such a cutie! Yes, maybe you are right… You must be used to Saturn but it actually makes me uneasy… Is Saturn the strongest planet in your chart? Mine is Jupiter, the light-hearted and good-humoured king of the Gods… And the Moon, with its subtle and sweet aura… Gloomy Saturn makes my life feel too heavy to endure, pushes me to the ground… I know I will outlive it… I’m a strong and persevering piece of work…  I just don’t want to make a big mistake… I’m getting too old for big mistakes… I’m scared of being choosing career over love out of terror of monotony… I can’t bear monotony. And thinking of myself at the same place, in the same position at work, doing the same things, seeing the same scenery, in the same stage of my life… just kills me… Hi Gem!!!! So glad to find you around!!! I’ve missed you so much, my fairy goodmother!!! Your words always knock sense into me, especially when I panic! I used to wait for things to fall into place… Patiently wait for things to come… And I learnt in the bad way that I had been wasting my time. You can’t wait, life is too short. There are too many things and places to see, too many experiences to just wait there to die… Fighting is the only way forward. It has been a painful lesson… That’s why I’m not renouncing to going abroad… It will be initially about a year and a half… Maybe and probably longer… I always wanted to run away to live abroad because I couldn’t cope with my boring and unfulfilling life. And I did. It was the best thing I could do. I’m the woman that I’m now thanks to that. But it also taught me not to run away… I was bounced back… I needed to be strong enough to overcome my teenager ghosts and nightmares… But I’m feeling stuck again… I learnt that lesson, am I making the same mistake again? Is this running away? Why can’t I just be happy with what I got? Something is missing… He is missing but I can’t find him… I had to choose… Back to cold and gloomy Britain, on my own again, free and with a exciting changeable and promising future, learning new things, travelling away??? Or stay here in this predictable and warm world, with a monotonous and steady, not really promising career, with my family and friends, having that old flame at reach just in case he wants to come?… What is Saturn trying to teach me? To not wait and go after challenges, to fight with my new conquered strong and brave nature… Or to endure monotony and claustrophoby to grow stronger and find love? 
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Taurus80
Knowflake Posts: 636
From:
Registered: May 2005
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posted July 04, 2005 04:13 PM
steelrose,
glad i could help a little..
as for my friend, she read a book called the "Quarter life crisis" helped her understand that everyone goes through that feeling of panic.
right now she is thisclose to getting the job she thinks she wants..but it also has her panicking. she told me she doesn't want to feel trapped in the job, and doesn't really know what to do. a part of her still wants to go away to school to get her masters, because she feels this may be her last chance to do the "going away college" thing. she is taking it one day at a time, but keeping all her options open, she just wants to be happy-(like a true virgo, she analyzes everything do death!..lol)i think AcousticGod is right..just let the experiences happen.. you are going through growing pains, which i think all of us go through.
hope this helps.. IP: Logged |
running_bull
Knowflake Posts: 276
From: the desert, usa
Registered: Nov 2004
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posted July 05, 2005 04:41 AM
Steelrose,
I am just finishing up with my Saturn return, trust me you will grow and learn from this experience. It's tough, like a trial by fire... but you will be a stronger, more focused person by the end. But only If you use your time wisely and learn from what's being presented. Don't worry though, because I spent at least the first few months in a deep funk when it seemed everything was not going my way. Now looking back, I see what I wanted then would not either fit into my life now or would have simply been totally wrong for me period.There's a movie I love called "Searching for Debra Winger", in it Sharon Stone and Charlotte Rampling have some of the best observations on life I have ever heard. Particularly Sharon Stone, when she says something about putting away the things of youth to become a woman, or something like that. it was true in what Saturn's return taught me. Maybe you can try renting it? IP: Logged |
steelrose
Knowflake Posts: 801
From: Spain
Registered: Sep 2004
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posted July 05, 2005 02:12 PM
Hey, Taurus80... Well, yeah, I suppose I’m doing the same thing... I feel this is my last chance to wander around the world, come and go free travelling before I get too old and have other ties… That “being trapped” feeling sounds soooo familiar… Has she got any strong Sagittarian influences or a strong Jupiter??? Stellium in the 9th house? Sun in the 9th?Running_bull, I had one of those trials by fire going on for years… And recently it went terribly painful… Pluto transiting my Moon-Ascendant-Neptune conjunction and squaring my Sun… It only eased its grip a few months ago… And now Saturn is coming!!! Aaaarrrrrgggggg! I wonder what are the main differences between the two trials? Saturn and Pluto? Pluto was very transforming. I became a new prerson in the process. The old me died, was buried in darkness and hell… It felt as if I wasn’t breathing anymore… But I was reborn as a beautiful butterfly. I loved the change after all… What about Saturn?
P.S. Thanks for the advice about the film... I'll try and get it...
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