Posts: 124
From: England
Registered: Oct 2009

posted September 04, 2006 03:46 PM            

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Hey everyone
I want to get some opinions if I can on something.
Basically this Capricorn I had an on/off thing with (because of me being 15 and him 21), in April suddenly stopped talking to me altogether in the biggest withdrawel from guilt he's ever had. I kept trying to speak with him and he completely ignored me and got on with his burgeoning fame and fortune career. I became the most depressed I had ever been in my life because he meant the world to me at the time. But I slowly tried to wean myself off him. Anyway, I cried more than ever and so often but had to get through until four damn months later, he contacts me saying sorry for being a jerk. I thought he meant it but when I speak to him again he's acting the same old way. I still get down sometimes cos he's the first person I liked that way and that much but I've pretty much decided to forget about him for good cos he's never gonna change and he's a complete ****.
Anyway, I also used to like a Cancer guy who's in the same band as him but sort of gave up trying to chase him when I got more involved with the Cap and because I never found out if the Crab liked me that way too. However the crab has always been so much nicer than the Cap. He called me to cheer me up when I was miserable and always asked how I was and meant it. And he's sweet and funny and I've finally realised all this time I've been after the wrong guy. Basically I trust this guy and recently I sort of told him about me and his friend. I want to tell him everything ad I don't know why. But the crab has actually said he'll take me out for dinner 'one day'. We were joking about it and then I asked him seriously and he said he would. He knows I fancy him. Anyone who knows anthing about Cancers think he likes me too but is too shy or something to say? Or because of my age? (I'm 16 on the 7th).
And what do you think the odds are he'll keep his promise unlike the Cap?
Thanks
If this was too vague, ask and I'll post some astro stats or whatnot.

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posted September 04, 2006 03:58 PM            

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Posts: 124
From: England
Registered: Oct 2009

posted September 04, 2006 05:16 PM            

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Tha Cancer is 21 too, like the Cap and I'm almost 16.
And yep. the age of consent for sex in England is 16. Is it 18 now in America????
Not moving there, then.

EDIT: btw, as for how taboo it is, it depends on your own personal views. Some guys have no qualms about relationships with underage girls, some are reluctant, like these guys and don't think it's fine. But it is, most of the time a 5 year gap which is neither really a close OR huge gap.

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Posts: 7
From: The Asylum, NC
Registered: Apr 2009

posted September 04, 2006 05:23 PM            

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Actually, it usually depends on what state your in in the US. The age of consent ranges
from state to state.

Anyways, about the cancer. It depends on his chart or personality, but usually we keep our promises. I think they're both backing off right now because of age which is understandable. Who knows....why don't you wait and see.

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Posts: 124
From: England
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posted September 04, 2006 05:44 PM            

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Thanks, Dulce Luna. Yeah, I've heard it's 14 in one state!
Anyway, the reason I was asking is cos I've been doing the 'wait and see' thing for a long time now. I was waiting and seeing a year and a half ago when I was friends with them both. The only difference is the Cap did promise things would happen when I'm 16 yet I don't see him sending me a birthday card somehow...
Sorry, thing is, i would be more patient if I already hadn't been strung along for such a long time.

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posted September 05, 2006 11:55 AM              

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Majority chances , he would keep the promise whetther or not , he is interested in you .
again, if the peole are guessing it right (that he likes you and i am assuming he has a bit of confidence ) age doesn't matter .

i would suugest , either talk staright or be just a friend , dont give him overt signals , no ' i fancy u kind of glances ' .

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From: The Asylum, NC
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posted September 05, 2006 03:54 PM            

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Yeah MNF, and I think its in Alabama. Frankly, I think thats gross.

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Posts: 46
From: just left of center
Registered: May 2009

posted September 05, 2006 05:09 PM            

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Hi ! and Happy B-Day....

Cancer men...jeez! I married 2 of them....

I would say he too is hesitant because of the age thing....
I know how it is. Dating guys your own age is like being with a twelve year old (mentally and emotionally)...
I was way mature for my age and thought I knew what was best....I got married right out of high school to Cancer #1...We started dating when i was a sophmore and he was a senior...Then I moved 1000 miles away...I was devastated.. We kept in touch, agreed to see other people and when the timing was right we would see how we felt...I graduated and he moved 1000 miles to be with me....It was wonderful and I was happy... and yet... we both changed... natural changes that occur as a young adult and one day we didn't feel the same... I wouldn't go so far as to say that I regret it... but I wish I would have waited till I was at least in my 20's... we change so much from 16- 21... and even more by 30...
You've got everything ahead of you... Have fun being 16...The cancer will wait if his feelings are true....Water signs will wait a long time to get what they want....

Sending lots of love...
From your fellow (older) Virgo Aries Cappy

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"The only limits are those of vision"

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Posts: 124
From: England
Registered: Oct 2009

posted September 05, 2006 05:13 PM            

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cancerrg- heya
"no ' i fancy u kind of glances ' ."
You mean if he does take me out? Oh is that definitely the wrong thing to do with Cancer men? It's just I might not be able to help it, cos I do fancy him! haha And how will he know I do otherwise?

Dulce Luna- (Does that mean sweet moon by the way..?) Yeah... I've heard people get up to all sorts there....

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Posts: 124
From: England
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posted September 05, 2006 05:19 PM            

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Heya Stargazer- just saw your post. Sorry I don't have a lotta time to reply right now but I want to say thanks for posting.

Yeah, you get why I like the older man.... haha. Was that pretty usual? For kids round your way to marry right out of school? I doubt anything like that would happen to me!
I really wish the Cancer liked me that way. As much as I like him But the way i feel make me want to have a taste of romance now since I've had none previously in real life (ie. an actual relationship) and I don't see why you should have to start on little boys... Of course men probably isn't a great idea either but sometimes you can't help the way you feel...

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From: The Asylum, NC
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posted September 05, 2006 05:40 PM            

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Stargazer, I can so relate to the "older man sentiment". Correct me if I'm wrong, but you have a cappy rising right? I do too.

MNF-yes, it does mean that

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From: just left of center
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posted September 06, 2006 10:46 AM            

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MNF...No, here in Ohio it is not considered acceptable...But in the South, at least in the 80's, it was rather common....not saying that its smart by the way..
I was VERY hell bent on getting my way. I was extremely angry at my parents for moving me away...at the beginning of 11th grade...They had a choice to stay... and chose otherwise... It was mostly my Dad...
I never got a long with my father... not until I was out on my own and out from underneath his thumb... He is a Libra/Libra Rising/ Gemini Moon... Kind of like living with a prosecuting Attorney... He was very strict.... He knew that if he did not give his blessing that I would move back to TX.
So in hindsight, my getting maried so young probably had more to do with my "getting back at him" than it did with "true love" or my perception of it...I never went back to live under my parents roof... and now again, in hindsight, with children of my own, I know that I cheated them in a way out of the "young adult" living at home stuff.....
I guess what I'm trying to say is that it is real easy to get so caught up in stuff about "Guys" that you lose track of whats important at your age and IMO its to truly discover who are and want to be....
I know you probably look and act much older... Cappy rising and a Virgo..... I could pass for 25 at 17...
Now at 39... I still get carded for ciggs.
a nice little perk for all the hell you put up with having Saturn as your chart ruler...

Dulce... yes, Cappy Rising... Only once have a dated a younger guy.. (recently)

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"The only limits are those of vision"

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Posts: 124
From: England
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posted September 06, 2006 12:49 PM            

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Stargazer, heya, I'd have thought most parents would be pleased to skip the 'young adult living at home' thing otherwise known as 'useless blob that eats us out of house and home'

Yep, I too am a Capricorn rising and it gives me a nice comfort to think how I won't look bad as an older perosn

I'm not as such thinking about 'guys' haha. Just well... feeling very charged at the moment.... haha... I wouldn't be thinking about men at all if I honestly didn't know even one. Just lucky I don't know any in real life then!

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posted September 07, 2006 03:14 AM            

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Posts: 124
From: England
Registered: Oct 2009

posted September 07, 2006 02:10 PM            

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Thanks

I feel like I should be touching wood (for un-jinxing) and not getting het up about this. I figure I should have learnt some sort of lesson from last time.

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posted September 08, 2006 10:37 PM              

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quote:

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we change so much from 16- 21... and even more by 30...

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I agree with this very much so. I wouldn't know about the "by 30" part lol since I'm 20 at the moment, but the first part is definitely true. I've changed miles since I was 16. I mean, I'm still the same person but much calmer and more aware. It’s very strange in hindsight, to see how much you actually do change. I came on this site when I was 17. Even seeing old posts makes me go "I said WHAT?" sometimes.. lol

MNF, the Cancer guy sounds nice but take it slow like CG advised also. My advice would be not to jump the gun..

But to be honest that's the advice older people always give younger people and it *never* works lol.. so at the end of the day, do what you feel is right in your heart! We all go through our first love, our first relationship, our first heartbreak.. there are some things you can't shield people from. Trial and error is part of maturing and growing up..

That being said though, definitely be careful about getting TOO physical.. Having an Aries moon you might be very excited and happy about the idea of having sex.. but sex can feel like pretty serious business, specially the first time.. It isn't as *easily done* as it might sound.. and it is a big deal. I wouldn't advise anyone to have sex under 18. It is up to you, I just think you should be careful and sure this is what you want and that you are doing this with the right person - someone who has proved (throughout time) to be worthy of your trust.

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From: England
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posted September 12, 2006 03:23 PM            

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Thank you Lauren, that's very sound advice

I know people change a lot and I've heard it's not such a great idea to rush into sex... I am by no means desparate- my pickiness prevents that but it's hard having a whole lot of stuff in relationship/sex houses, particularly my Sun in 8th. And add to this the fact I have been totally starved of any kind of relationship and attention right up til my 16th and you get an idea of the frustration.

Anyway, I really don't think the Cancer intended for the 'date' to be any time soon. He said 'one day' which probably means 'when you're 30' knowing him.

And.... tragically, despite really not, well, liking the Cap as a person as much anymore, since after insistting he wanted us to talk again, he promptly made no effort, as if he expected me to cotact him, smug git. Anyway, against my better judgement I emailed saying "How are you?" and just that simply cos i don't feel i've got closure ont his thing, I want to know why he hasn't contacted me and i can't bear to think he doesn't care. But... if he doesn't, I guess I'll just have to find out
Thank you to everyone for advice- it's all been great. Any extra is always appreciated.

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