posted July 04, 2007 01:00 AM
Hi everyone. I'm coming to y'all for advice and insight. I'm going to try to keep this short, but can't promise anything.I married when I was 20, child before 21, divorced by 23. For the last 10 years I've pretty much been in hiding. There were a few "friends" right after my husband left, but nothing major, and absolutely nothing for the last 8 years. My son has been my main focus, and my ex screwed me up even more than I had been, so men have been pretty well off limits.
Until this last year. A year ago this week in fact Steve started working at my place of employment. We quickly became friends, meeting up on breaks and such. It only took him a week to figure out my break schedule and suddenly he was always there. We're a tight knit group at work and it didn't take long for rumors to start flying, but it was just friendship and minor flirtation. (I'm a Leo, what do you expect of me. 
) Anyway, he only worked there for about a month before his personality clashed with someone everyone wanted rid of, but instead of firing the jerk everyone disliked, like she should have, our supervisor let Steve walk.
We called each other a few times over the next months. One time was because my supervisor pulled me into her office to disclose what had come back on Steve's background check. A major breach of Federal confidentiality laws. (I lost all respect for her that day.) But Steve refused to pursue it because it might make trouble for me.
Anyway...I called him about 2 months ago, left a message. He called back, missed me, I called and missed him, etc.. etc., etc,. About 3 weeks ago I got a text message from him. Now realize I had not actually had any contact with him since before the first of the year. It had all been missed messages. We text back and forth for about an hour before I convinced him to come to my best friend's house, where she and I were sitting outside and talking, which is normal for a Friday night for us. His vehicle was down so I picked him up and we sat at my best friend's for almost three hours just talking. We then text each other a couple of times over the next week, but then a glitch came up. His phone stopped accepting my texts. Of course I didn't realize that at first and I thought he was picking a fight, which was the same thing he thought I was doing. We hadn't had contact for about a week when I suddenly got a text - "I deserve to know what the problem is" That's when we figured out that the texting wasn't working anymore. We weren't calling each other because his plan still has limited minutes and his son is in California with Grandma for the summer, so he was trying to save minutes for when his boy called. We then saw each other this last weekend, again sitting outside my best friend's for a few hours. But I think things are starting to move.
I'm getting ready to do some remodeling at my house with Daddy this next week. I had mentioned it to Steve, who has done construction work, and he told me that if we needed help I better call him. I also asked him to help me move some furniture around this weekend and the only thing he said was "If we take anything upstairs we'll have to go out and around the house. The stairs are too steep." No snide remarks or we'll sees, just simply 'this is how we have to do it.'
I'm really caught up in this man. He has full custody of his son, who happens to be just 6 weeks older than my son. Steve fought for him. Went through 6 lawyers to get custody. (Such a turn on for a single mom like me.) The only problem is our boys were actually in school together for a few months right after Steve got custody. They don't like each other. At all. My parents are not going to be happy when they find out I've been spending time with him. Of course, no one is ever good enough for Mama and Daddy's baby, but with my track record they're really cautious about me. And my son, who has been asking me for the last 4 years when I was going to get married again, throws attitude the first time Steve is around just to hang out, at someone else's house.
Oh, and I found out his birthday finally this last weekend. July 30, 1975. Mine's August 14, 1973. There are only 2 luminaries that are not in the same signs in our charts. Moon and Jupiter. Everything else conjoins. No wonder I feel so comfortable around him and feel like he understands everything I say.
I've been in hiding for so long I think I'm scared. But I'm not sure. With the boys involved we both have to be extra careful, but there is something in me that just keeps saying "This is it. THIS IS IT!!!" I don't want to count any chickens yet, but I can't help it. I have been absolutely giddy the last few weeks, simply because I have seen him and talked to him. People at work are getting annoyed with me for always being in such a good mood. I walk in singing in the mornings, which is so not like me.
I don't really have a question about all of this, and I've rambled much more than I meant to without telling the full story. It's just that I tend to overanalyze things. If anyone has some thoughts or suggestions or advice I would really appreciate it. How is it I can be so confused yet know exactly what I want all at the same time?!?
Love and Peace to All
LLL 
Lindaland
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posted July 04, 2007 01:00 AM
