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Author Topic:   soulmate? or karma... or just plain annoyance!
persian_cat
Knowflake

Posts: 6
From: UAE
Registered: May 2007

posted November 04, 2007 09:18 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for persian_cat     Edit/Delete Message
There's one person who keeps popping back into my life since meeting him 7 years ago. The attraction is too much to be ignored. And the separation after a simple dinner or coffee is PAINFUL (literally!). Both of us are married to different individuals now...however, the feelings toward each other didn't change a bit. It's like a constant in our lives that no time nor distance can erase. Too classic and too boring, but we felt "trapped". For those kindred knowflakes who can give me a little insight on this, I'd be really grateful:

His details:

April 18, 1969
no birthtime
Manila, Phils

My details:
July 31, 1974
6:30 AM
Manila, Phils

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miss_muffet
Knowflake

Posts: 777
From:
Registered: Mar 2004

posted November 04, 2007 12:18 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for miss_muffet     Edit/Delete Message
Hi Persian Cat,

No amouont of explanation, astrology or otherwise will ever be enough to satisfy your search for an answer. I know because I have been there and done that. The answer you are looking for is within you.

I want to let you know that you are not alone. Your situation is more common than you think, even more common than other people would like you to believe.

Just a bit of advise... If you decide to leave your husband, leave for all the right reasons. Do not leave him to be with another.

I know it sounds selfish but you need to focus on yourself. Know and do what is "best" for you. Only you can know that. I am saying this because in the end, your happiness or unhappiness will eventually affect everyone around you.

MM


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Irish Eyes
Knowflake

Posts: 461
From: PA,USA
Registered: Apr 2004

posted November 05, 2007 12:46 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Irish Eyes     Edit/Delete Message
I agree with MM!

Great advice. A lot of us have been there and to make a painful choice. Never leave one to be with another because it very seldom (if ever) works. And remember the law of karma...what you do to someone else will come back to you 3 fold.

-Irish

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persian_cat
Knowflake

Posts: 6
From: UAE
Registered: May 2007

posted November 05, 2007 05:15 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for persian_cat     Edit/Delete Message
....Yeah, you're both right. I couldn't agree more on that. We have agreed to uphold our spouses and the family and have encouraged each other to become the best partner there is to our spouses. I want to figure out how to stop the intensity of our feelings towards each other. Getting into extramarital affair is uncharacteristic of me, even with him. But out attraction towards each other started on our first meeting and it never went away after that. We met long way back when we were both single and we were into relationships other than our current partners....I had felt that PAIN when I saw him with his girl..I found it strange at that time already. We were doing our MBA programs at that time, during our first meeting. We were both mature individuals when we first met and we have talked about our attraction openly and the options that we had at that time. He suggested that we go into a relationship but I declined. So we went on with our lives until we got married to different people. I thought it would die down after all these time but these feelings are annoying me because a part of me wants to entertain it while the other more sensible part would choose to brush it off. For the past few months I have sought for answers. One clue I've got is from a dream that I had last May 2006 where I met him in a situation wherein I'm pregnant with twins and he left me and I ran after him, with which I lost him afterwards. The scene is straight from 18th century Spanish era in the Philippines. I was so young at that time...I think only 17 years old. In the dream I was screaming, crying and running after him and the house where it all happened is so vivid that I could even identify the fabric of the curtains and the surface of the wooden floor! I would have disregarded that dream had I not notice the fact that I've never been into such house or read about something like it in full details, that I can still remember the smell of the newly scrubbed floor and the cool breeze getting through one of the windows. What's remarkable is the sinking feeling and this utter pain in my chest mixed with realization of loss and longing and the tears in my eyes and his NAME on my thoughts at the first few seconds upon waking up from that dream. I've see this happen to people in the movies but never would I thought of having a vivid dream of some situation that I have never experienced before....

The thought of me and and this guy and a possibility of a relationship in our past life started to haunt me since that day. Thus, I've been seeking for answers...to free us both and not ruin each of our respective families..

I feel stupid seeking closure for a relationship that never was. And this is the trap that I'm referring to. I have come to realize now that I cannot run away from this.

I truly appreciate your inputs...it may mean saving my sanity.


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miss_muffet
Knowflake

Posts: 777
From:
Registered: Mar 2004

posted November 05, 2007 07:18 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for miss_muffet     Edit/Delete Message
Persian Cat...

Let the past stay in the past. Even if reincarnation is true, there is a reason you did not end up with him in your past life. Why bother trying to bring it all up in this life now? Look forward to the future...

One thing I learned from trying to find my own closure is that there isn't one. When you love deeply and completely, and walk away, there is no real closure to be had. The only thing you can do is accept your choice (and it is a CHOICE) and move on.

It is very difficult, especially in the beginning. From time to time, talk it out with a friend. It will help keep your sanity.


MM

BTW, I am also from the Philippines. Left there 18 years ago.

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