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Author Topic:   What I Learned from the Opposite Sex
MysticMelody
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posted March 26, 2008 12:42 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for MysticMelody     Edit/Delete Message
What have they taught you of value to your growth? What original mistaken perceptions have changed due to their positive influence? What did they teach you to add value to your existence/life?

------------------
"Did you ever get the chance to dance along the light of day?"

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26taurus
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posted March 26, 2008 12:56 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for 26taurus     Edit/Delete Message
They all taught me where I am to find my one true love and soul mate.

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hippichick
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posted March 27, 2008 09:48 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for hippichick     Edit/Delete Message
They have taught me men are different than women...not worse, not better, just different.

They have taught me, in re-cognizing this difference, that what I would think/do in a particular situation is not necessarially how another would think/do, especially one of the opposite sex.

They have taught me, by letting me into their soul, their hearts, that they are wounded and they need healing just as much as anybody else.

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cancerrg
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posted April 08, 2008 04:07 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for cancerrg     Edit/Delete Message
:::They have taught me, by letting me into their soul, their hearts, that they are wounded and they need healing just as much as anybody else.

:::

thats wonderful!

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hippichick
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posted April 08, 2008 01:31 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for hippichick     Edit/Delete Message
I really wish more folks would respond to this thread...

The topic speaks volumes!!!

Gosh, what are we here for anyway? Why are there men and women???

If not to learn, and grow, then why....

ps thanks cancerrg

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hippichick
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From: The Ether
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posted April 08, 2008 01:34 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for hippichick     Edit/Delete Message
but then again......the lack of response, I think, reflects a growning trend in society..

"me, me, me"

No reflection, not... what can we do mutually, to learn and grow, but "what can you do for me...."

uggggg.......makes me ill........

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AcousticGod
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From: Pleasanton, CA, USA
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posted April 08, 2008 03:03 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for AcousticGod     Edit/Delete Message
I never saw this thread previously. I don't come in here all the time.

Ok, what I've learned:


  • Subtlety. Particularly from my first love who was a Cancer. There were so many times where I'd realize after the fact that the writing was really on the wall the whole time. The information wasn't blatantly in front of me, but was implied by piecing everything together into a whole concept. She worked in subtle ways, and I adapted to read the language. Sometimes I've applied that language to other girlfriends, however, and found that these subsequent girlfriends don't necessarily work in the same way. Still a good talent to have overall, though.

  • I need time to do my own thing. I'm not excellent at spending loads and loads of time with someone (better with my current Sag than anyone I've been with previously). I'm too restless, and I start missing my hobbies. I need time to myself to do my own thing.

  • Older is better. Maturity is invaluable.

  • Maybe having arrived at your destination is not a requirement that needs to precede having a relationship. This is kind of a Capricornian mindset whereby the feeling is that all these things need to be in place before I can settle down. That sentiment may not be true.

  • I need to show my hand sometimes. I'm not always the best at expressing what I feel. There's a hope on my part that it's understood, but I realize that I have to actively show my appreciation, and it has to be an ongoing thing.

There's probably more, but there are some off the top of my head.

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hippichick
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posted April 08, 2008 03:33 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for hippichick     Edit/Delete Message
Great articulate input AG!!!

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Galactic
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From: Colorado
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posted April 08, 2008 06:36 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Galactic     Edit/Delete Message
I've wanted to respond but all of my thoughts would involve sarcasm. ><

I've learned that men are perpetually 13.

I've discovered that in my relationships I have to be the "teacher" (I'm sure that's just a me thing).

I've learned that men need to play as if they are young at times or they get depressed.

I've learned that even with men that are not demonstrative, they feel as deeply as their "softer" counterparts do.

And most importantly....if you feed a man well, he'll be happy.

I really tried to avoid the sarcasm...lol. Keeping this light and positive.

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hippichick
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From: The Ether
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posted April 08, 2008 08:04 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for hippichick     Edit/Delete Message
Galactic

I have the tendency to be quite sarcastic, as well..

Still, we learn......

(i suppose!!)

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cat71
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posted April 08, 2008 08:36 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for cat71     Edit/Delete Message
My first response to this was - nothing...

Then I thought about what Hippi said about the me, me, me thing and went back to the drawing board, so to speak.

So I have learnt (particularly as a result of relationships)

Men don't have a road map to what makes a woman happy/unhappy - if he asks "what have I done" - for goodness sake just tell him, don't do that thing "if you don't already know I'm not going to tell you..."

Essentially, we all feel the same but in differing degrees.

Everyone understands what "I love you" means when it is said from the heart.

Some men are emotionally immature, not ALL of them. If he doesn't suit you after 3 months not much is likely to change over 3 years, walk away, don't try to change him, you won't.

A fight over the remote control is just not worth it, buy another TV

There are still men of principle in the world, if you find one, hang on for dear life even if it's just as a friend, you will always have someone to share with who has no agenda hidden up his sleeve.

I could go on all day now, but I won't

Good answers all

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AcousticGod
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From: Pleasanton, CA, USA
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posted April 11, 2008 07:36 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for AcousticGod     Edit/Delete Message
bump

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future_uncertain
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posted April 11, 2008 11:59 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for future_uncertain     Edit/Delete Message
I'll play!

I've learned a few things from studying the opposite sex:

*we're really more alike than different at heart-- it just mainifests itself in different ways.

*when a guy says something, it is often exactly what he means-- no analysis required.

*guys seem to be more vulnerable when in love than females because they sometimes lack the understanding and vailidation of their own feelings.

*it's ok to crack open a few cold ones and veg out in front of the TV.

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AcousticGod
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From: Pleasanton, CA, USA
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posted April 13, 2008 04:28 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for AcousticGod     Edit/Delete Message
quote:
guys seem to be more vulnerable when in love than females because they sometimes lack the understanding and validation of their own feelings.

Interesting.

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lechien
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From: Germany
Registered: Apr 2008

posted April 13, 2008 04:48 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for lechien     Edit/Delete Message
i think i've learned how to not expect and give up... at least in the head. the emotions are a different story. i guess it's my solution to defend myself from getting hurt. it's kinda sad...?

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AcousticGod
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From: Pleasanton, CA, USA
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posted April 14, 2008 01:29 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for AcousticGod     Edit/Delete Message
quote:
i think i've learned how to not expect and give up

What does that mean?

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lechien
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From: Germany
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posted April 14, 2008 03:05 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for lechien     Edit/Delete Message
oh ya, that sounds confusing...

i meant,

1. not to expect anything from them or from the relationships (which is a good attitude, take it as it is), but also so that i would not be hurt as much when i'm betrayed.

2. and to let go (if it's not working the way it is)

it has a bit sadder undertone, since i used to be very passionate and dived head-first into relationships. but nowadays i'm cautious, and ready to withdraw. overly protective of myself.

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