posted June 01, 2008 12:37 PM         

I have loved you forever, Raymond
And I would give up a thousand tomorrows
if only,
I knew I would have you, again
Please come back to me.

We need you,
Signed,
Jen, Chewy, Gracie, Michaela and Cassidy

posted June 01, 2008 08:48 PM         

I have two little polished river rocks
Sitting on a tiny table in my tiny hall
They are both labeled ...
One says "Remember"
The other says "Miracles"

Under those tiny river rocks I wrote
A teeny tiny hope-note
A secret wish that I wanted known
Even if it didn't come true
Before he was ... Home
Maybe he would find what I wrote

I wrote "come back to me"

And he did

Even Linda thought so
Her mind knew what she should do
But sometimes its hard to ride the Carousel
With both hands waving in the air
Don't worry ... you will get there
That's what twins are for, after all

My love, Raymond
My Twin ...
Thanks to Linda-land for making a place to be heard ...

All you need is .... Love ...

Don't let anyone tell you different.

posted June 01, 2008 10:02 PM         

Reading what you wrote made me cry!! I'm a Cappy girl going thru a rough patch with my Piscean man, and he's been pushing me away lately during his rough transits when all I'd like to do is support him through it all and make it better.. I'm hoping and praying that he too will find his way back, like your Raymond, because I feel that he is my Soulmate/Twin Soul. And I'm gladdened to hear that your faith in your man helped you.. May you make many, many, many more happy memories together.

posted June 01, 2008 11:02 PM         

Thanks for making it all worthwhile. Since we both have Pisces men and we are cappy girls I can share with you what my greatest challenge has been. Of the (almost) 3 years that we've been married it seems I have noticed that I am always the one who waves the white flag. Yep I do mean always. And I guess it gets the fears-a-flowin' ... "hey, doesn't he love me enough to come after me" so then I do dumb cappy things like "test" him. And Oh aren't men SO good at our girl-tests (not!).

So whats hardest for me even though I always say and know-deep-down-I-believe-it ... is to put my money where my mouth is so to speak I always say that I can give anyone the benefit of the doubt and I hate finger-pointing-blame-counters(!) So when it came really, really down to it ... I had to try SO hard to remember .. "Hey(!) silly goat so what are you doing? Are you saying now that you made the wrong choice when you said I do?"

Well what cappy in their right-score-keeping-mind EVER wants to admit they didn't fully think something through the first time (here's a clue -- not me!). So I said ... ok ... logically, if I believe he loves me then what can I do or how do I put myself in his shoes. And also, more importantly, how are my hurt anger-oriented actions affecting this Pisces and his Pride?
For we two are so alike in the pride dept. And boy are our fights like a boxing match; meaning we are in it until one of us goes down for the count.

(cont.)

posted June 01, 2008 11:04 PM         

So first and foremost for any cappy, as it reads right on page #1 of the cappy manual ... ===>>> make sure you feel GUILTY about all of your actions, makes NO difference that you can't take them back. So after the guilt had cleared, oh rest assured it was still and always will be near After that, I tried to do his favorite thing ... I left messages like nothing happened. By that I mean I tried to stay away from what was holding us apart ... until we can be (physically) together to work out the deeper stuff. Right now, we just needed to talk. See Ray is an OTR truck driver so I already feel apart from him and I can't stand not being able to at least talk to him on the phone. Anyway, so I tried ... however pitifully ... to pretend, sort of, that I could be an adult ... I left messages about his truck and stuff

posted June 01, 2008 11:04 PM         

But what came out was so far from what was intended ... I just cried and cried and when I could breathe enough to speak. I told him "I love you" and I hung up.

So Sunshine ... of course .. he got the message. He called right away. This same man who shut me out after a big phone-fight last 3-day-holiday-weekend. Since the shut out last 3-day-weekend I have tried to text him holding strong to my position. I tried calling him last night and several times today.

But what it took was for him to feel me, I believe. Nothing else matters Sunshine, just the love. Don't ever let the love fade or hide behind anyone's pride ... especially your own. As long as you know he's the one, yours will continue to shine

posted June 02, 2008 11:55 PM         

Last night, I caved too. I had been composing an angry email to my guy yesterday, telling him all the things I thought he'd done wrong, all the things that were mishandled in our relationship, and I felt relieved to be able to get it off my chest. But then I realized that I had gotten them out of my system, and I didn't need to give him all that negativity, so I never sent it.

Last night, I woke up in the middle of the night and had this epiphany - I remembered these words he had said to me during our brief call that day along the lines of how he was obviously not giving me what I needed in the relationship, and it hit me like a ton of bricks that this mistaken assumption he had, had been a source of insecurity for him, and that he was trying to distance himself from us so that in the event I were to break up with him (which I never planned to do, I love him so much!), he wouldn't be so heart-broken (we have history of this, metoo, i'm sad to say).

I couldn't sleep, I was so blown away by this, and I poured out my feelings to him in a long letter.. I told him how much I loved him, how he had always been more than enough for me, and how no one else would do.. how badly I've missed him.. I sent it to him this evening, and I'm praying that he gets the message too, and comes back to me soon too...

posted June 13, 2008 05:56 PM         

quote:

---

Well what cappy in their right-score-keeping-mind EVER wants to admit they didn't fully think something through the first timemake sure you feel GUILTY about all of your actions, makes NO difference that you can't take them back. So after the guilt had cleared, oh rest assured it was still and always will be near After that, I tried to do his favorite thing ... I left messages like nothing happened.

much like me!! I'm loath to admit to mistakes (to myself, though I will cheerfully admit to milder ones with other folks!) and have never liked dwelling on blunders I'm responsible for, because I might never be able to drag myself of the hole I'd dig myself into!

I also have this expectation that he should come after me when we argue, to make me feel better
And it made me smile to read that you left messages about his truck and other things - why are we Cappies all about the pride, all about being so adult and mature, instead of just being spontaneous and admitting that we miss and love someone?

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