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Author
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Topic: believing
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writesomething
Moderator Posts: 2202
From: meet me in montauk
Registered: May 2006
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posted October 18, 2008 06:32 AM
 
I was talking to my good friend about someone I loved...she asked if i thought he was the one, did i love him...etc...and i said yes...she said then you shouldnt give up on him. i dont know, she knows the story. he moved back to canada, we're not talking(more like he's hiding)..and well, i just dont know where i stand in general with him. never been so confused, ive been forced by silence to move on. she knows the story. i just wish she didnt tell me this. shes critical, blunt, and a person i know i can come to for truth. so when she told me not to give up on him, it really left me confused. im numb to the whole thing. i can barely think about him, if that makes sense..at the same time, hes always on my mind. i think i only remember when he remembers. nothing ever felt so natural. IP: Logged |
deuxantares
Knowflake Posts: 856
From:
Registered: Nov 2006
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posted October 18, 2008 07:35 AM
Can you give some more background story, if it's ok with you? Were you in a relationship? If yes, why did you break up? You don't have to give specific details.  IP: Logged |
Scorpionic Web
Knowflake Posts: 689
From: Pennsylvania
Registered: Dec 2005
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posted October 18, 2008 04:42 PM
When friends say "don't give up" to me, I figure they're just trying to be supportive. Unless it is strictly an objective issue that I know they are particularly skilled with, then I don't believe they actually assume to know what is best for me. No one knows my limitations better than I do. And I'm sure my friends realize this. So I always consider their advice to be an attempt to give me optimism rather than a literal solution. They're friends just playing their role. When I have taken friends advice literally, it almost always fails because I'm allowing someone else to direct me, and not listening to my own instincts, and I deserved to fail by not thinking for myself. IP: Logged |
Lara
Knowflake Posts: 2598
From: London
Registered: Mar 2006
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posted October 18, 2008 06:33 PM
send him love writesomething... at all the times you think about him, from your heart to his. xIP: Logged |
LetsDance
Knowflake Posts: 199
From: Where there's dancing...
Registered: Mar 2006
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posted October 18, 2008 06:49 PM
SW has made some good points. quote:
...know what is best for me...No one knows my limitations better than I do...not listening to my own instincts, and I deserved to fail by not thinking for myself.
Points, writesomething, that I believe you have already done. To quote the conversation with your very good friend: quote:
I was talking to my good friend about someone I loved...she asked if i thought he was the one, did i love him...etc...and i said yes...
since you said "yes" to both questions quoted here, writesomething, then I think you should not give up on him either, until you yourself have a change of heart.  IP: Logged |
writesomething
Moderator Posts: 2202
From: meet me in montauk
Registered: May 2006
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posted October 20, 2008 09:07 AM
deux- no, not a couple. we were friends for about 4 years, and then it got romantic, and things just got weird...and hes back in canada now.sw- thanks for your insight. it was insightful. lara- im trying but it really hurts to even think about him. theres a blockness from him i sense, hes trying to block me out or hes trying to turn his feelings off from it. disconnect? i dont know how to explain it. lets- dont give up? i dont know. it feels like i have no other choice, sometimes.. a general yearning for him has become apart of my everyday living. i dont know how long im suppose to wait. "lost cause". IP: Logged |
Scorpionic Web
Knowflake Posts: 689
From: Pennsylvania
Registered: Dec 2005
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posted October 20, 2008 02:52 PM
Writesomething- Thanks, insightful insight is the only insight I ever want to incite.IP: Logged |
deuxantares
Knowflake Posts: 856
From:
Registered: Nov 2006
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posted October 20, 2008 03:09 PM
WS, ok now we have established that you love him. If you feel that he may be "blocking" it, that means he is also feeling the connection strongly and is just denying it. Remember, what we resist persists. Send him loving thoughts before you go to bed. Pray that you be in contact again if it's meant to be and be relieved of your feelings if not. Do it for 1.5 months everyday. You will get the answer.IP: Logged |
writesomething
Moderator Posts: 2202
From: meet me in montauk
Registered: May 2006
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posted October 20, 2008 09:03 PM
thank you deux, i will try it.IP: Logged |
oneruledbymars
Knowflake Posts: 147
From: South Carolina, USA
Registered: Apr 2008
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posted October 20, 2008 10:16 PM
WS-I hope you don't mind me asking, but how did it get wierd? I mean did it end on a bad note? How long were you guys romantic?
Sorry for all the questions just curious....------------------
Scorpio Rising
Moon in Sag
Aries Sun IP: Logged |
etoile03
Knowflake Posts: 84
From: Allier, France
Registered: Jul 2007
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posted October 21, 2008 04:41 AM
WS don't deny your feelings, but don't let them rule your life either. I have someone who i had a brief but perfect relationship with and then out of the blue he did a 180 and now like you I am "forced by silence to move on" god that phrase resonates SO well.I would have been happy to stay with him forever I think, but what I have done is tell myself to take what I learnt about love from him and make that my benchmark for future relationships... I guess my lesson from him was that the "perfect love" is possible and attainable... dunno if what I said makes sense to you... take care
Mel IP: Logged |
Lindaland
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