posted March 31, 2009 11:41 AM           

I just don't think our personalities mesh together...He says if we want for it to work it'll work...but I believe you need to work at something to make it work, things don't magically happen like he believes. His perspective on life is where we disagree and it affects everything in our relationship. He said he sees something broader than the now and present but I believe the now and present makes the future...He's lazy, irresponsible, uncaring sometimes due to that and ends up hurting me. I don't know how long this will last. Do you think this has to do with his immaturity? I'm thinking I need to be with someone more mature...

I'm a Taurus Sun/12th, Moon in Scorpio/6th, Cancer Ascendant.

He's an Aries Sun/7th, Moon in Aries/7th, Ascendant in Libra.

We're great when we're intimate but that's not enough to ignore all else...He wants forever but I'm not sure if I can give him forever and I can't change him and I'm not going to try because that's his personality.

posted April 01, 2009 12:45 AM         

I hear you. You sound very frustrated, but I think you really like your boyfriend and you are looking for a way to understand him.

His perspective on life is where we disagree and it affects everything in our relationship. He said he sees something broader than the now and present but I believe the now and present makes the future...He's lazy, irresponsible, uncaring sometimes due to that and ends up hurting me. I don't know how long this will last. Do you think this has to deal with his immaturity? I'm thinking I need to be with someone more mature...

Me and my scorpio have challenges with how we perceive things, but we talk about it. We do NOT always see eye-to-eye, believe me. Sometimes they are down right battles (never physical or verbally abusive, just two people with fixed opinions), but we are determined to find out what makes each other tick, and try to compromise. We are both stubborn, but we really love each other, so we keep trying and communicating.

I just don't think our personalities mesh together...He says if we want for it to work it'll work...but I believe you need to work at something to make it work, things don't magically happen like he believes.

posted April 02, 2009 05:31 AM           

Here's what you do...

Make a great, big, giant neon sign
that says everything you want to say...

You can build it on the turf
of a football stadium; --
no, really, its got to be huge.

Then you rent a pilot and a plane,
and take him up r-e-a-l-l-y high.

Then you give him a parachute and drop him
over the stadium, with the sign flashing below.

Make sure there are all sorts of
bells and whistles and things, too.
The more the merrier.

And as he approaches earth, he will read the sign...

And then, m-a-y-b-e, he will get the point.

Sometimes you have to make things very clear to an Aries.

posted April 02, 2009 01:25 PM           

Mama Mia- Yes.......I don't know what I want. I want to trust him but I feel something is lacking,...I wish he was more sensitive to my feelings...My Aries has no water except his Mars in 4th and MC in Cancer...Don't know if that's enough for me. He's a good guy and sentimental and sensitive in his own way. I actually feel like we connect more when we're intimate and that's when I'm satisfied.
I've been trying to keep some time to myself and I told him I need some time alone but he sees that as weird. But right now I barely have time and stressed from financial issues at home that I can't be out everyday like he wants.

LetsDance, my boyfriend is somewhat passive agressive...he has a 7th house stellium and a Libra Rising. He doesn't tell me how he feels most of the time but I can see it in his face when something's wrong and lately I've been telling him to tell me how he feels. I am fortunate that he is willing to talk, or listen mostly...I also know how he's feeling/thinking before he even says anything and that freaks him out.

HAHAHAHAHA HSC that's hilarious...
"Maybe?" he'll get the point? Lol
I have to agree.
The day after I wrote my post I saw him at school and he wrote me a "5 min poem" about how he doesn't mind being hit by me (metaphorically) and that maybe "she's just worried and I forgive her..." I said I didn't really like the last couple lines because they weren't true. I told him later I don't feel I did anything wrong and him writing that showed he still didn't know why I was upset...and forgive me? What did I dO? However he agreed, as always....

Instead of waiting for me to hangout with him all the time I wish he'd use his time productively...So far he's shown me he's needy and clingy, and very jealous and possessive of me. But if he really has me on a pedestal like he says, I'd expect him to keep his word and more sensitive to how I'd feel but that's not the case. So it confuses me...
I've also been thinking that maybe I'm just not ready to have a relationship, that maybe it's just me. I'm beginning to think I'm looking for someone to father me....
Venus Conjunct Saturn and DC in Capricorn? Because I think I want a father in my life.

posted April 03, 2009 12:53 PM           

*she literally just loses track of time and place I think, especially since it is not the first time we have been over and practiced the rules of the street.*

I find this to be true for my Aries too...He does lose track of time and he's told me many times "what would I do without you..." I'm quite the oppposite, punctual and exact with time. I see what you're saying and I think I've been put under so much pressure lately that I just couldn't deal with his childishness...But I also see that he doesn't do that intentionally and he's agreed to try to be more conscious.
Thanks for the advice guys, I'm going tell him if I want something rather than wait for him or expect him to get subtle clues. But he will need to be more responsible and manage his time better because that's respecting me and my time.

posted May 14, 2009 04:59 AM         

The fire instinct of this position allows the person to think that nothing is impossible.

Most of the obstacles that one in this position encounters are not considered obstacles at all but opportunities to prove that all can be overcome.

The sun in Taurus is ,quite figuratively, on the other side of the fence.

The sun in Taurus is an earth sign; practical, methodical, realistic and pragmatic.

Taurus is also "fixed" which means there is a high level of inertia. One tends to "move" or "act" when they feel that it is all worth the effort.

Remember that child who used to ride the wooden pony for hours,not caring that the pony moves at all,but enjoying the swing from back to forth, over and over again. That child was not a Taurus.

Taurus is all about conserving energy, so that means that Taurians are slow to get excited, slow to get emotional and always seem impassive or even disengaged from what is going on around them.

When you put an Aries and a Taurus together, you get the feel that one is the "child" while the other is the "bigger sister/brother" .

If you can find a way to not get irritated with Aries' inconsistancies and "childish behavior", you have a better chance at surviving this relationship.

If your boyfriend can find a way to honour appointments and take your need for consistancy seriously, he has a better chance of surviving you.

I am Sag myself with a Taurus.

posted May 15, 2009 03:47 AM         

I suspect that you have gotten comfortable in your situation,despite its current akwardness....

Anywho, there is also the quincunx aspect between your two moons(both ruled by mars) that also provides a weird connection that may result in you not knowing whether it is good/bad or just...well..there.

posted May 15, 2009 12:29 PM         

So yesterday, I asked what he thought about taking a break (not seeing each other) for a week. He said it's not cool but if it's what I want then he'd respect that. I said that I want to make things work for us since we get into so many arguments. He said but our arguments aren't ongoing...
Anyway he agreed to not see me for a week. I hope that this clears my thoughts a bit and I am able to see if I could live with him or if I do better without him. I need to do what is best for my health at this time. I don't want anymore distress. I am getting more than enough from family and money issues. I hope that I made the right choice, and took a passive approach like you said...because I know my Scorpio Moon squared Mars is impatient and wants finalization. But that's always caused me more upset than relief.

I was taking a break from school for more than half a year to help out the family, working 60 hours a week you know and I quit that job the beginning of this year and that put a lot of stress on my mom. (I live with my mom and sister).
My mom told me recently to consider moving up to Seattle to my biological mom (whom she knows is a terrible person) but she thinks it would cost us less with me not being here. But she cannot take care of my 9yr old sister alone. I help out a lot in the house and my mom takes for granted the things I do and puts more duties on me, and you know, I can only do so much.
My mom also got really upset because I was out late seeing my boyfriend. She called me one night and said she wasn't ready for this kind of thing. She started crying that she feels I am becoming distant with family because it's hard but me being stressed and distant is also stressing her out. She said in hard times family needs to go through it together...I told her honestly I don't know if I have the mental energy to do that...But she wasn't making much sense over the phone. She cried and made me cry and she even said for the 4th time in my life to move out so she didn't have to confine me.
On top of that, a couple days ago she said she found birth control pills in my purse and started talking nonsense...
At the same time I was battling with my biological mom. I had asked her to help me out with rent for over a month and I realized she was tricking me into thinking that she would give me money but each day she was supposed to give it to me she wouldn't pick up her phone. She wants me to be desperate to the point where I would want to come up to Seattle and help her out at her restaurants.

posted May 18, 2009 04:28 AM         

It is perfectly fine to vent, I imagine that you have been bottling these issues for a while now.

Look,from my perspective, it seems to me that even though you care for your boyfriend, you have a lot that is going on in your life and the uncerntatinty of the relationship isn't helping much out either.

What is interesting is that in your life situation you seem to filling someone elses shoes i.e being the mother figure and being expected to have it all together all the time.

I think it is unhealthy for people to breakdown and emotionaly blackmail others to act or behave ina specific manner, it is even worse when those people are your parents...shewww that can be too much.

I have been in a similar situation before (although not as taxing as yours in any way)where I was expected to be Superman.

For the sake of brevity, I wont go into details but I'll say that I found from both sides I was being told what to do, and how so and so need me to be there for them and all sorts;

How I need to do more and how I need to be strong. I was exhausted, trying to please everyone and do the "right thing" until I couldn't do it anymore and revolted.

It shocked the hell out of my parents and lead me to a cocnclusion that I never thought I'd have; my parents do not always have my best interests at heart and if push comes to shove, each person puts themselves first(parent or otherwise). Its only human.

Unfortunately there is little you can do to control what is going on around you but you can control how you respond to it.

Perhaps your boyfriend is not mature enough to support or understand the current strain that you are under, maybe you were hoping to lean on him for suppport and he proved too immature.

I found it best to rid myslf of things that caused unncessary strain and tension,I found myself asking "What is best for me in this situation?" and all obligations seemed to just fall away.

It wasn't easy, many paople thought I was being an a***l but in the end I found peace.I began to focus on what was important for me and worked from there.

posted May 21, 2009 08:48 PM         

Everytime I try to tell my boyfriend that maybe we should go on a break, he makes it work out in a way that we don't end up going through with the plan.
I just had another argument with him...We have completely different ways of seeing things and we don't understand each other...
I honestly don't know what I am even angry at now. He kept asking me what's the matter, but I told him, I am clearly upset but I can't figure what it is...I'll tell you when after my thoughts are organized. I told him I felt I was being attacked by him...I was pushed to my limits today. I didn't want to be there with him...He said sorry but what's he to be sorry about? I told him it's not his fault, that it's something that I have said poorly organized and made him think something that is not true and made him feel bad and now I feel bad about it.

What does it mean to be serious about "us?" He said he doesn't think that I am... I said, I am only committed to you and no one else. I don't know how to be completely serious about "us" because I don't believe in forever...Or I don't see us forever.

posted May 24, 2009 07:23 PM         

quote:

---

My mom told me recently to consider moving up to Seattle to my biological mom (whom she knows is a terrible person) but she thinks it would cost us less with me not being here. But she cannot take care of my 9yr old sister alone. I help out a lot in the house and my mom takes for granted the things I do and puts more duties on me, and you know, I can only do so much.
My mom also got really upset because I was out late seeing my boyfriend. She called me one night and said she wasn't ready for this kind of thing. She started crying that she feels I am becoming distant with family because it's hard but me being stressed and distant is also stressing her out. She said in hard times family needs to go through it together...I told her honestly I don't know if I have the mental energy to do that...But she wasn't making much sense over the phone. She cried and made me cry and she even said for the 4th time in my life to move out so she didn't have to confine me.

---

For your Arien fella, I just don't think it's meant to be. It sounds like your values and priorities are too different.....

posted May 24, 2009 10:26 PM         

as for aries, i have known a few! possessive, yes, jealous, often surprisingly NOT (too self-centered to notice! lol) but they have trouble seeing the other side of the picture...and MM's story sounds right on the money. in the moment. bright as buttons but too busy to take instructions well.

posted May 25, 2009 05:53 PM         

*Sigh*
So many things are happening and my mom is very stressed about money. She cannot make more than minimum wage because of her english and I cannot work full-time because of school.

I got hired at small local amusement park, The Santa Monica Pier at the food court, well, I was supposed to work a the Coffee Bean there but they gave that to someone else who had an open schedule.
I have to say that's one of the most labor intensive jobs out there.
Anyway....
I quit that job after two days...not because I hated it, althought I did, but because I have a essay draft due for peer editing tomorrow and I had no idea until the day before that I would have to work memorial day from 1:30-9:30... I have not even started on my essay and I was freaking out. And the work place is really strict there. I called and asked if I could be excused just for today because I was hired Saturday you know...but they said, You either come today or you don't have a job.
I had bits of assignments throughout last week, a big math test on tuesday, and I had to get all my online philosophy assignments done on friday so I could work. I don't have a math book so I go to the school library to do it which is why it took longer for me to get homework done too...I had spent 8 hours in the library doing that to prepare for the test, so by the time I got home I was tired to do anything philo. or english...English isn't due until tuesday so I put it off and I didn't want to get around to it because it requires heavy thinking... I need to write a 5 page about how the theme of the Allegory of the Cave relates to The Cathedral by Carver...And let me tell you, writing does not come naturally to me...Also after work on Saturday I went over to my bf's place to do three loads of laundry and a load yesterday. She thought I took laundry to make myself look better for going over to his house... I just wanted to get laundry done and help out because we don't have our own laundry machine. I can't think straight with clutter and piles of dirty clothes at home. My plan was to do my essay all day Monday.

What bothers me the most is disappointing my mom. She and I are both very stubborn and we have a love-hate relationship, I think.
She's a Scorpio/Sag/Pisces Asc. She also has mercury in scorpio and I have mercury in taurus.

She said she will not be happy until she brings home $5000 a month or I bring in $5000 a month. I told her that is why I am trying to maintain my A's in school and you need to be patient with me...

Sorry guys, I don't know what my point is.
"Her" point was that I need to grow up...
I told her, "Can't you see I am working on it, Mom?"

posted May 25, 2009 07:57 PM         

Thanks for describing your situation a bit more.
I’m left with more questions tho
Your desire to please your mom is admirable, but what about pleasing E.??
It sounds like you’re doing fine with school and it’s your top priority, as it should be right now.
But it’s not your fault that your Mom’s English is not good, restricting her employment options – that’s HER issue, and it’s not fair for her to expect you to make up for her choices and her limitations. There is assistance out there for folks who are near the poverty level, I hope she’s checked out all those options.
You know, $5,000/month is a good salary and a commendable goal. But you can live very well on less than that – I do.