posted April 08, 2009 06:48 AM         

I am in a dilemma with feelings..ugh..you know, those irritating things that you just can't get away from.

Here is the deal, I am a gay male sagittarian with a male gemini.We've been going out for about 18 months until I found out that he was cheating on me throughout our realtionship.He denied all this and mantained that he loves me and wants to be with me etc, etc...

Now here is the thing:contrary to public belief, some sagittarians are faithful and prefer to have one relationship at a time. Even though I am a flirt,I am transparent in all my dealings and so I just couldn't understand why he couldn't tell the truth.

What hurts most is that he kept on mantaining that he loves me and wants to keep our relationship going and that he didn't cheat. Unfortunately for him, the guy he cheated with recorded the whole escapade with a hidden camera and sent it to my phone and his face clearly shows.

When I showed him the images he began crying and saying that he was scared of telling me the truth because of how I'd react. Well, predictably, I did react badly and broke it off.

I was deeply hurt and didn't date anyone for a year afterwards.

This year we met again, and as expected, he got very emotional and said that I've made his life hell because he has been unable to forget about me and that he still loves me as he did before...

I do admit that I was angry, that I got on my self-righteouss horse and wanted nothing to do with him because I was bitter.

Now,though, things have changed,my suppressed feelings have begun to surface and we are talking about getting back together. The problem is that I still don't trust him and find it difficult to forget about the past because he is not transparent and can twist the truth so far that he looks "innocent".

Advice?...

posted April 09, 2009 10:15 AM         

Yes, the venus in aries is a flirtatious one. He is actually the one who made the first moves before I was even aware that he existed.

This relationship was a hot one, both our Mars formed an aspects to each others' Suns and Mars signs.

Venus in Aries for Scorpio venus is both an exciting and frustrating all at once.

For one thing it is exciting because Aries has the same no holds barred that Scorpio has but what is equally frustrating is knowing that the Arians love/connection may not be exclusive to Scorpio.

This kills the passion that Scorpio yields to Aries, instead of love and peace it becomes jealousy and suspicion of being used as just another "lover".

posted April 09, 2009 03:22 PM         

I am a true believer in "once a cheater, always a cheater."

posted April 10, 2009 07:59 PM         

For me, it depends on why me and my SO broke up in the first place. For instance, say we were both very young, or we didn't necessarily know how to communicate with each other or we were both weren't quite "over" a previous hurtful relationship, or he say/she say mess.

For those scenarios, it may be worth it to try again with the same person. Infidelity IS tough, but not impossible to repair. However, the cheater really would have to PROVE themselves trustworthy to you and that will take time. So you may not want to get romantically involved with that person right off until you observe how they treat You as a Person and people in general. Is he considerate meaning he values people and is careful how he treats them? Is he dependable, such as does he stick by his word? If he is wrong, does he sincerely admit it and is he willing to take steps to make changes that will rebuild your faith in him? etc. These things can tell you ALOT about his character. This way you are giving him a fair chance to see if he has changed or "grown up" from the man that hurt you.

Ask yourself this, would you want to be or could you be a good friend to this person? I'm a firm believer in friendship. You actually "LIKE" the person. You can build so much from that.

posted April 14, 2009 02:42 AM         

LetsDance;

you are absolutely right. I usually do a mental checklist of the qualities that you stated(and then some others) to ascertain whether someone would be compatible with me or not.

In his case, what transpires often is the inability to tell the truth: Its as if it would kill him to do it and so he tells me what he thinks I want to hear.

This is the pivotal reason that I can't be revisiting ur relationship again. I don't like to be suprised, I'd like to know everything about the person I am dating; even if he is a playa, he musn't act like he is an angel coz thats deceptive and that is what I can't stand....

Anywho, I am friends with him. As I am not one to be bitter about it...

GemGemGem: