Posts: 2
From:
Registered: Apr 2009

posted July 12, 2009 07:35 PM         

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I never thought one person could make me hurt so bad, I always thought I was stronger than this, after everything I felt with Donald, I thought I would never let another man put me through this, I guess I was wrong, I am going through this again, and the worse part is, that I have been in a relationship for over 5 years now and the person that is making me feel so much pain is not the person I am in the relationship with. I don’t want to get into details but I feel very weak, I feel ashamed and humiliated for allowing my heart to feel this much pain, when I first started talking to him I never thought I would allow things to get as far as they did, but it happened, and it so happens that it meant much more to me than it will ever mean to him….. How and why and when did this all happen. I have been taking it all out on my guy with the 5 year relationship…..he has no clue that my anger and pain is being caused by somebody else….he was aware about this other person….but he thinks that is all left behind in the past…. He has no idea that I feel as though my heart has been literally taken from me. As though somebody took my heart and decided to just step all over it, and than just leave it thrown somewhere in the street! How could I be so foolish? How can I let this happen to me? I have asked myself this question over and over and I feel pain in my body….literal pain from head to toe….. I know that I will make it through the rain….I have no doubt in my mind… and by writing this it is a way to release the pain….to begin to heal again…. I thought I was healing, I thought I was done with this…. It turns out that the worse was yet to come….now I am just hoping this is the worse of it……because it is too much for me to bare…. Now lets just wait, my intent is to learn from this as much as I can. And to forgive myself and those involved….. I am aware that there is something this person came to teach me….. Even If all I feel is hate at this moment…..I am sure one day I will look back and feel love… and forgiveness.. God Bless.

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Posts: 1055
From:
Registered: Apr 2009

posted July 12, 2009 08:02 PM         

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Awwww, hugs and good thoughts to you.

My life in that area feels painful right now too.

I wish you lots of healing and happiness--good for you for acknowledging that you need to heal--that can help healing along.

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Posts: 471
From:
Registered: Apr 2009

posted July 14, 2009 09:04 AM         

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You've got a good take on it (correct english?).

Give yourself time. Can u travel right now, what about india or some other far away places? A few weeks. Or south america? Mexico? Or farther? A cheap journey would even make it more enjoyable.. Meeting people on the road, train stations...

U'll be fine.

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Posts: 25
From:
Registered: May 2009

posted August 07, 2009 12:50 PM         

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aww bless, try to be in another place right now, like pia said whether its travelling or meeting new people it really helps to shift your mind from him and be more part of something else or with other people/friends.

I hope your heart heals, blessings to you...give it a little time.

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Posts: 21
From: India
Registered: Jun 2009

posted August 07, 2009 01:50 PM         

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Much love to you.

Try spending time among trees and plants. Wear green. Meditate and try and regain your inner composure. You seem to be on the right track

You'll get through this. Hold on.

Hugs

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for whatever we lose (like a you or a me)
it's always ourselves we find in the sea

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Posts: 427
From: Stonehenge
Registered: Apr 2009

posted August 07, 2009 02:24 PM         

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{{HUGS}}

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Posts: 4
From:
Registered: Jul 2009

posted August 11, 2009 07:00 PM         

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My heart goes out to you. I am in a similar situation. Someone I've been with for years and won't or can't for some reason reciprocate the strong feelings I have for him. It's like he can just totally shut down his emotions and not feel any pain. I live with him, work with him and am around him most of the day. I try to do my own thing but it's hard. My body feels weak and I've been chain smoking, drinking, trying to stop the pain but I can't shake this feeling and he is seeing someone new. Which is why I'm joining the military but even that's not going so well as there are problems with my medical stuff, enlistment, etc. Just take things one day at a time, things will get better ((hugs))

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Posts: 540
From:
Registered: May 2009

posted August 19, 2009 11:35 AM         

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How are you doing?

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Posts: 151
From: Ohio
Registered: Apr 2009

posted September 01, 2009 10:50 AM         

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I was also wondering how you're doing.

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