posted January 18, 2010 12:25 AM
I would send the letter if:
1. You were friends and generally had good and flowing communication.
2. He appreciated your ideas and beliefs in conversation and listened to what you had to say.
3. He is either interested in metaphysical matters himself.. OR.. mentally alert and open enough - to be able to play with several ideas in his mind, even if they are quite different to his own beliefs.
4. He is generally a laid-back person.. who doesn't take himself too seriously and isn't an ego-maniac.
5. During the time that you knew him, he was generally able to empathize with another human or with animals.. and understand their experience.
I would not send the letter if:
1. He harmed you in a serious way (specially if he never acknowledged the error of his ways and never apologized).
2. He is too closed-minded and fixated on his own beliefs to take in anything you might have to say.
3. Your conversations always and only revolved around both of you together, your relationship, sex etc.. Basically, if you didn't have other topics or common points of interest to discuss.
4. You see him as "immature".
5. He has an ego-problem. He is self-obsessed.
If PA is right and you are doing this for closure.. it might be a better idea to write the letter and burn it. Someone else can't give you closure. Only you can give *you* closure. If this is the case - writing to him might simply prolong things.. or start something again (which may not be what you need right now - you know best).