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Author Topic:   Haunted by lost love
Libran lady
Knowflake

Posts: 12
From: London, UK
Registered: Feb 2010

posted February 11, 2010 08:10 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Libran lady     Edit/Delete Message
HI All,

Im new here and wonder if anyone has any advice for me?

Early last year I had Uranus trine Venus transit and met an Aqua guy online just as it was kicking in.. We dated happily for 7 months until he stated he didnt want a r/ship and I then called it off. Havent seen him since but the Uranus/Venus trine is picking up strength again in my chart and I now find I CANT GET HIM OUT of my mind.

I was doing well up till now and dont know why he has reappeared in my thoughts, my dreams, my whole consciousness... We had amazing synastry Venus trine Mars, Venus trine Pluto, Venus Sextile Neptune and Venus sextile Jupiter (all within 1" orbs) and Sun trine Mars exact too

In the composite we had Venus sq Mars and Pluto, Sun conj Venus, Merc and Jupiter and eek! Moon opp Uranus


Its like he is haunting me!! He does text from time to time and he did last wknd.. but I feel so LOST and bereft again

Sooooooo do any of you wonderful peeps think that when the Uranus trine Venus transit passes at the beginning of March I can finally move and consign this guy to the past? Thats is what Im hoping anyways..

Me: 18/10/1970 17:50, Northants UK
He: 03/02/1973 Unknown, London UK

Any thoughts would be sooo appreciated!!! Thank you x

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comica23
Knowflake

Posts: 889
From:
Registered: Apr 2009

posted February 11, 2010 02:41 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for comica23     Edit/Delete Message
Hi, I'm just reading the aspects from your posts - with the Sun/Venus/Mercury/Jupiter conjunction in your composite, there should be strong affection/attraction, and it is warm and joyful. These square to Mars can indicate further attraction (although not easy), but with Pluto in the picture, things might not be very easy. There could be complicated underneath issues, there could be sexual issues too. Hard aspects with Pluto can often indicate selfishness or too much emphasis on physical sex.

I'm still not very good at chart reading for others, but I suggest you to post the synastry chart and the composite chart here so other members that are more skilled can take a better look at your case.

To post your charts, save their images in your computer, and then upload them in a free image hosting site (tinypic, imageshack, photobucket, etc.). Then just post them by [IMG ]site address[/IMG ] (without the spaces).

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Libran lady
Knowflake

Posts: 12
From: London, UK
Registered: Feb 2010

posted February 11, 2010 05:08 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Libran lady     Edit/Delete Message
Thank you and you are spot on already! Yes there were sexual issues and a big emphasis on sex... I always kind of thought it would only be short but sweet and very sexual lol, I guess it was a bit of a sexual revolution for me with the Uranus trine Venus transit I had going on thru last year, and which is once again exact, seems to be bringing it back into focus now four months later... I have just felt his 'presence' this last week or so, dreaming about him and remembering stuff, don't know if that makes sense..? I guess its because he texted me last wknd and I replied, after rebuking all but politest contact until now

I will have a go at fetching the charts, don't hold your breath tho lol!

Thanks again, that really helped x

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Libran lady
Knowflake

Posts: 12
From: London, UK
Registered: Feb 2010

posted February 11, 2010 06:09 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Libran lady     Edit/Delete Message
ok here goes ;

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Libran lady
Knowflake

Posts: 12
From: London, UK
Registered: Feb 2010

posted February 11, 2010 06:09 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Libran lady     Edit/Delete Message
Oh it worked after all!! LOL!

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Diana
Knowflake

Posts: 1475
From:
Registered: May 2009

posted February 11, 2010 08:57 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Diana     Edit/Delete Message
I really like your synastry. Nice grand trine. The conversation must've really flowed.

I wonder if your venus in scorpio was a bit too intense for all his air/earth/fire, but no water chart.

He would need to feel completely non-smothered. Even if you didn't do anything smothering, he would sense that you felt that way, and that is enough for a air/fire person to run.


I have no idea if this is what happened, it's just a thought by looking at the charts.

Do you have any idea where he was born? The houses would be good to know, because maybe he has a water AC or a lot of planets in a water house.

Also, they say any relationship started during a uranus/venus transit is usually short lived.

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Libran lady
Knowflake

Posts: 12
From: London, UK
Registered: Feb 2010

posted February 12, 2010 04:56 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Libran lady     Edit/Delete Message
Thanks again! Yes we did have great conversation, a great connection I guess from even before we met in person.. then we dated for 7 months and never had any conflict at all! My sister said this was not normal but we didnt have anything to argue about, we just enjoyed being together and always got on

I think he was a commitment phobe to be honest, he had all the classic signs, never had long term r/ship and very much a 'bachelor'. The r/ship for me was about learning a different way of relating (yep not smothering lol) which I was learning through dating gurus such as Paige Parker and Mimi Tanner, who advocate not contacting guys but letting them chase etc and it worked fine in this case as he did most of the initiating

But yes, the scorp venus in the 7th leaked out lol, it was actually me who 'ran', he had calmly stated we were weren't 'casual but not in a r/ship', tho he wanted it to continue, well the scorp venus and aries Asc didnt like that one bit, and I told him that wouldnt work for me as long as we were being intimate etc

I guess I would have liked him to fight for me a little but no, he replied he would always think highly of me, he understood and respected my decision, hoped we could stay friends ba bla bla, he did try to backtrack a bit the next day but I was too far gone I guess by then

Within 2 weeks he was back cruising on the dating site we met on and that was a kicker so I eventually did the same and any time he has contacted me I have been merely polite, I notice he is on there often but don't see what he is so obsessively seeking that he didnt have here but oh well!!

I take it you mean his time of birth? No I dont have it unfortunately so thats a shame

Thanks for your insight though, it really helps, I have felt like I am going crazy this past two weeks and there is no one who understands, if I try and talk about it to family or friends they just say I am better off without him etc and none of them are into astrology either.. so I really appreciate you taking the time to help

xx


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annaf
Knowflake

Posts: 13
From:
Registered: Jun 2009

posted February 14, 2010 08:18 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for annaf     Edit/Delete Message
Libran Lady,

Of course only you and him know what actually was said and done. But from the outside and from reading your post, he doesnt sound as if he had done such a terrible thing. Whatever may have 'leaked' in terms of your intense scorpian vibes, to me it sounded as if it was you who acted pretty distant while being in the relationship.(Following these dating gurus advice sounds a little bit like playing games) You said he was doing all the chasing etc. And the 'not casual but not in a relaitonship' comment?.....Honestly? That sounds like a venus in capricorn square uranus comment, to test the grounds if I'm not sure where the other person stands. I have this like him and it's something self-protective I could imagine saying if I'm insecure how the other person really feels. I'm not defending him here, but it doesnt sound as if he has done such a terrible thing. He backtracked the next day and has tried contacting you repeatedly since. Seriously, forget about what transit you have had or may not have had. It felt good being with him (and I think the synastry shows that), so why not give him another chance. This time without playing too many games and making clear from the beginning what you need as well. And seriously, who cares what your friends and family say, it felt great to both YOU and HIM while you were together. I think that's a rare thing to have, so why give that up. There's nothing in what you have mentioned here which says, you really are better of without him

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eskimono
Knowflake

Posts: 202
From: uk
Registered: Dec 2009

posted February 14, 2010 09:04 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for eskimono     Edit/Delete Message
I agree with Annaf - live is too short to give up something so special to you so easily.

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stopandstare
Knowflake

Posts: 245
From:
Registered: May 2009

posted February 14, 2010 12:00 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for stopandstare     Edit/Delete Message
dear libran lady,

i say do what you feel is best for you. whatever happens, at least you know you gave it a shot and tried to do what you could on your end to make things happen.

i think a lot times, people get caught up in other people's opinions on a situation that only that person can truly understand. i think things always work out for the best when you do what you should do on your own.

i hope things work out or that you come to a peaceful conclusion with this.

best of luck

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Libran lady
Knowflake

Posts: 12
From: London, UK
Registered: Feb 2010

posted February 16, 2010 05:17 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Libran lady     Edit/Delete Message
HI! Thanks for all your replies.. I texted him with a friendly text the other night... woke up to 5am to find a reply and he has since been texting all day yesterday and txted again today ...

Fingers crossed then! I hope that we either get a second chance or both get closure to finally move on! Thanks again! Its so good of you all to take the time to help a total stranger, you have really helped me get my muddled thinking straight xx

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Libran lady
Knowflake

Posts: 12
From: London, UK
Registered: Feb 2010

posted February 25, 2010 08:09 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Libran lady     Edit/Delete Message
So... we met up last night and as usual had a lovely time, he seems keen and looks as if he is at least willing to make an effort to reunite, he was gorgeous as ever too lol. I came home tho and cried all night, feel awful as I am so afraid of getting hurt again and dont know what to do for the best .. Wish I could have a guarantee before proceeding! He has lots of travel plans coming up and is seeming pretty much the same when it comes to not wanting much of a serious r/ship but I am cool with that and I guess its too early to say how it might pan out. I am glad I went though and glad we have at least got the friendship back if nothing else comes of it, Im sure I will see him again soon and he did ask for a kiss and if he could see me again when he walked me to the station so he must be keen tho probably as confused as me.

I have read many times that nothing good ever comes of r/ships with composite moon opposite uranus and that it always ends badly and this worries me, as does the lack of saturn aspects in our synastry chart. Also I have an ugly saturn opposite chiron transit coming up which isnt hopeful and I am slap bang in the middle of a yukky neptune sq venus so rose coloured glasses are on, tho its waning a bit right now but not done with me yet.

Thanks again for your insights, its really helped getting things off my chest and a bit of closure if nothing else and im glad we're back on good terms and that I know if nothing else, he does care and there is nothing further we could have done to make it work.

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Alia
Knowflake

Posts: 387
From: az
Registered: Apr 2009

posted February 28, 2010 10:46 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Alia     Edit/Delete Message
Dear libran lady
I had a commitment phobe relshp w this guy ..
He just broke up w his gf of seven years and told me he needed space and time and blah..
Long story short after few months he stopped talkin to me and date a new girl which he moved in with too.
Seems like what those dating links say is true..
They ll be w you until they find the one they think is The One ....
Did u buy by any chance that guide to commitment?
Seems like there is one thing that makes them chose you ... But maybe is just some sale strategy..?

Anyway this guy now after 2 years is contacting me again and I'm happy but also worried.
I guess there's nothing we can do about it and just be unconditionally open,, just give.. W out pressuring them for commitment, and hope one day they ll find out in their heart who's the real one...

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Libran lady
Knowflake

Posts: 12
From: London, UK
Registered: Feb 2010

posted March 01, 2010 04:48 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Libran lady     Edit/Delete Message
Hi Alia

Yes- your'e right, proceed with caution and I have decided not to proceed further.. After our date I discovered he has created another profile on the dating site and was active online on friday, just two days after our 'date' last weds. I confronted him when he contacted me yesterday and he said he had been upfront about being on there, which I must have misunderstood. Said he was confused about my intentions blah blah. needless to say he asked again to be just friends but I declined. I am upset today cos I sold my precious car yesterday and could have used a hug this wknd. He can get lost!

Wish you all the best! I am going to try harder to move on..Thanks xx

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Nine
Knowflake

Posts: 402
From:
Registered: May 2009

posted March 11, 2010 05:44 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Nine     Edit/Delete Message
quote:
He has lots of travel plans coming up ...

This is a line straight out of the Aquarius dating book.

Based of the number of times I heard that line come up in Aqua threads, I wouldn't set my heart on anything.

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