posted April 21, 2012 05:17 AM            

After my divorce (been officially divorced for a year & separated for another year before that) with a Capricorn ex, I'm still somewhat trying to heal because it ended badly with him cheated on my numerous times.

When I first chatted with D, I had my walls fully up. I was hard on him. He let me vented out and opening up to him like I've never been to with anyone. Told him some stuffs that I didn't even tell my best friend. He was very patience with me and let me sort my baggage out. When I finally told him that he had knocked my walls down he said, no I did that myself, he was just helping me throwing out the garbage.

I fall hard for him.

He lives in the States while I'm Asia. When I first met him online I did had a plan to come there for work but that didn't work out because I didn't get the visa. It was before I got my visa denied that he finally told me he love me.

I have a friend who lives in the same city as him and they had met twice when he gave her some gifts to bring to me as she was coming home to Asia. She really likes him saying I'll be perfect with him.

He's just amazing, funny and most importantly he care for my son just like his own.

Anyway, things has been great but lately he seems cold. I mean, we still talk daily up until he starts going back to work last week. He works in road constructions and have winter time off. When he's working, he's out of town (where service mostly bad) and only come home during the weekend but he did make the efforts to contact me whenever he can get some service on his cell phone.

What confused me is at first he always say all these beautiful things that just melt my heart but lately when I said to him I love him he would reply "I know you do." He did mentioned at one point "You know I love you and I don't have to say it a million times every day." That taken me back because I'm a Pisces so when I love someone I love them hard.

I've been reading a lot about Cancer men but he's not possessive at all. He actually encourage me to dress up and wants me to get hit on by guys when I went out with girlfriends. Sounds weird I know but he explained that because he always told me I look great I don't believe him (scars from infidelity makes me have to work extra hard to regain my confidence) so he said maybe if strangers told me I look good then it will boost my confidence. He was right though because the last time I went out, I got hit on by some guys and yes, I have to admit it feels good in a way. But that's where he contradict the 'typical' Cancer men traits of possessiveness.

We also bicker over little petty things and it can really be frustrating at times. Although we do solve it pretty fast. Sometimes he says things that just rubbed me the wrong way and I'll shut down. Sometimes I says things that rubbed him the wrong way and he snapped like nobody's business. His temper is actually surprised me because I never been with anyone who's that emotional.

The plan is for him to come and see me this coming winter around November then we will see how it goes.

I love him but sometimes I wish he would be like the way he was when he first told me he love me.

Guess, part of me is still afraid that I will fail again because I did met my ex husband online. I moved to the States to married him. He and I returned to Asia then all hell breaks loose.

Sorry this has turned into such a long post but I really am confused. Does Cancer men really shows how they feel by actions than verbally expressing how they feels?

posted April 22, 2012 12:42 AM            

I felt a little stupid though for asking him "Did you miss me, Babe?" which he answered "What kind of question is that?" Blah!

We also got into financial discussion a little bit because I told him IF this works out and I move there I won't be able to work until I get my green card (been through this with my first marriage so I knew how it works) and it might be difficult financially to support me and my son. He said "We will be fine, Babe. Don't worry about it. It just means I will have to work harder." Awww...my heart melted.

I have a Cancer younger brother and I know he's very good in managing his financial so I do trust D.