posted June 09, 2012 03:20 PM            

On some days, she's chatty with me. We started chatting with each other in February. When she's in her chatty mode, she'd talk to me after our gym sessions, we joked around etc. She's actually fun to talk to and I believe we share some similarities - we both like to dance, we like the same type of music etc. She even called me 'what's up girlfriend' few times. On other days, she acts like she doesn't know me (i.e. ignoring me). When she's like this, she wouldn't even see me after our gym session, even after I make the effort to do small talk with her! It's almost as if she's bi-polar! (Sorry to all the Capricorn woman out there...I'm just confused why she's like that!). When she's ignoring me, it really aggravates me. I think it's more of my Leo ego talking! Seriously, I feel rejected to be her friend =) And I don't take rejection very well! That's why I guess I'm posting this...

The peak of her strangeness was few days ago. She got back from a week of vacation. I came up to her after our gym session to welcome her back and have a small chat with her, like where did you go, did you like it there, etc...you know..the normal conversation 'normal' people have when you don't see someone you know for sometime! And she just answered me with short answers (I mean...ONE word answer!) while packing her stuff up, not even bothered to look at me!

I go to the gym, to her class, everyday, because I love the fitness exercise she teaches and I like her choreo the best! In fact, because of this, I've lost lots of weight and I'm now fairly muscly. In a way, I almost resemble her - she has a fit and muscly body as well =)

Should I continue being chatty with her (even though sometimes I'm being ignored =( ) or should I back off temporarily (up to the point of not going to her class) until she notices that I'm not there? I'm always in the front row when I'm in her class, so for sure she will notice that I'm not there. By the way, could this be also the cause of her acting this weird with me - me being in the front row and wanting to chit chat with her after our gym sessions most of the time?? From what I've read, Capricorns are really big on privacy and this may 'suffocate' her a bit?? =)
However, I notice one time when I was absent from her class for a day, the next week, she asked me where I was! Also, I noticed she does pay attention to what I'm wearing to the gym as she sometimes give her comments on my gym outfits! So there..she pays attention to me sometimes, but at other times, she's completely ignoring me (or pretend to ignore me?)! I've never met anybody that sends mixed signals like this in my entire life!

Now, I've read a lot about how to befriend a Capricorn female (as I think she'd be a really cool friend once we're really friends) that I've been trying to find the answers to my problem online. What I've read so far pretty much said that it takes a lot of patience to befriend a Capricorn female. And usually the fire signs people (I'm one of them!) just don't have the patience to do whatever necessary to befriend a Capricorn.

This is an excerpt from an article online that I found: "To be completely honest, you (i.e. me) might lose faith before you get anywhere with her. You may go through a period of time where you feel you have exhausted all your resources. Her sign is notorious for having walls as high as the Sears Tower and fortified like Ft. Knox. It is likely you may not even get in the front door as her friend the first time around. This woman has all the patience in the world and isn’t afraid to use it. She doesn’t need a partner but eventually she will want one. The secret to making her want is to simply be the warmth that melts her ice". And of course this article is for guys who want to approach a Capricorn woman, but I think the same concept applies for those that want to befriend a Capricorn woman as well.
And quite frankly, I'm about to give up to befriend her! I would suck though, since I'm still gonna go to her class everyday (since I love the class she teaches and her choreo), and it would just be cool if she's my friend =(

I have additional questions:
1) How do I tear down her walls (of self defense)?
2) How do I build trust with her?
3) Would it be appropriate to ask her for coffee? What should I tell her - to get to know her better as friends coz I think she'd be a cool friend?? How would you, Cap ladies, take it? I don't want to turn her off...
4) Would it be appropriate to ask her why she's been ignoring me after few times being friendly with me? When would be the right time to ask this?
5) Since I know we both like the same type of music, would it be appropriate if I give her an mp3 player with bunch of (what I suspect to be her favorite) songs in it? Should I make it a "Thank You for Me Healthier and More Fit" gift, "Welcome Back" gift or "Just Because" gift?

posted June 09, 2012 04:09 PM            

Its hard for me personally to let friends in my life. That little excerpt you included is very true for me. I don't NEED friends, but sometimes i secretly want one.

Its very hard for me to let people in, and i have turned down "friend dates" with women on more than a few occasions.Idk why i am like this lol.

But don't give up! we like people who are consistent.that shows us you are serious and not just being nice for a moment.

Ask her out for coffee and see where that goes.

there is a chance she might not want to cross the client/instructor boundaries because that might be unprofessional in her opinion. I personally don't want my clients/ or staff ( I work as a manager) to see me in my regular element,i usually turn down, though nicely, offers to go out with my staff for drinks or roller derby (its popular in my area).

good luck!

posted June 12, 2012 01:32 AM            

Thank you so much for responding to my post! I really really appreciate it!

From what I've gathered so far from all your responses is for me to keep being friendly with her (but not in a way that looks too 'pushy' to her?) and give it time to be her friend. So, would giving her an mp3 player with all the songs that I suspect she likes be a good idea? The more I think about it, the more I'm going to make it into a 'Thank You for Making Me More Fit and Healthier' gift, since because I take her classes so much, I've lost a lot of weight and actually build muscles. What do you think?

@starzy54-
I know that Caps hate surprises and are very well planned in terms of everything.
Would it be better if I send her an email first, asking her if she wants to go get coffee (or running or whatever) when she has the time, outside of the gym? Or should I ask this after one of our gym sessions (would it not seem too impulsive)?

By the way, as I predicted, I was absent from her class last Friday (one day after she ignored me big time!), and today (Monday), she asked me where I was on Friday and we joked around about my answer. I seriously never met anyone, that I want to befriend with, like this girl - one day it seems my niceness reciprocate, other day it seems it bounces right back at me fast! =)

@jaiellelove-
=) I consider myself to be 'bubbly' and 'sociable' but I'm not the superficial bubbly and sociable type..you know the type that when he/she enters a room, everyone has to know that he/she's there =)

@Mystic Melody-
Thanks for confirming to give the friendship time to grow.

How much time does it normally take you, Cap ladies, to eventually be close friend with someone (i.e. to eventually trust them to be your friend)? I've read in so many posts here that you can really take your time...is that true??? =)

posted June 18, 2012 09:12 PM            

I love Leos! And you sound so nice, too, reminding me why this is one of my favorite signs.

Regardless of how much potential I see in Cap-Leo combinations, every situation is different, and this looks like a red flag...

quote:

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I've never met anybody that sends mixed signals like this in my entire life!

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It sounds like there could be something wrong with her, like she could really have amnesia or be going through heavy personal issues that keep her obsessed and preoccupied. And to put it bluntly, not meaning to offend anyone, there is also a higher percentage of lesbian women who teach gym than in other careers. Is she in love with you?

So I would stay upbeat but realize it's not you. Trust your instincts and don't worry if it doesn't work out.

Oh and welcome to Lindaland!

posted June 22, 2012 08:17 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Mystic Melody:
She probably has stuff going on in her life that makes it difficult to be jolly at the moment. She isn't there for relaxation and fun, it is her job. If you continue to be a friend, you will get there eventually. She isn't as demonstrative as you, so if she made the effort to compliment your outfit, she is either extending friendship or just being friendly to her customers. It will take time to figure it out. If you keep being a friend, you will eventually be friends.

Cap AC and Cap moon

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posted July 17, 2012 12:57 AM            

Thank you so much for taking some time to respond to this thread! Really really appreciate it!

@Faith,

Thank you for calling me nice! That's so sweet of you! I wish this Cap girl that I'm trying to befriend with is like you! =)
And no, she's not a lesbian. She's married. =)
Thanks also for your words of encouragement and welcoming me! Definitely I will stay upbeat, cause that's the way I am, and I wouldn't change it for anyone!

@Milkyshutter,

Thanks! What signs might that be? How long does it take normally for a Cap girl to open up to new friends?

Right now, I'm even on the fence whether to ask her for anything - coffee for example. Her mood changes everyday! As I mentioned in the thread, one day she's Ms. Chatty, the next day she's Ms. Grumpy. One day she chats and jokes around with me, the next day she ignores me, even tries not to have any eye contact with me to make sure there won't be any conversations at all! Super weird!
However, I'm constant, I'm still nice and upbeat to her, even though sometimes it doesn't reciprocate! It feels weird, its like I was just talking to a wall or something!
But I'm not the type of person who gives up easily either..=) So let's see how this will turn out!