posted December 19, 2013 07:19 AM            

Then out of the blue i met a nice guy. Yeeeyyy... Strangely i felt an almost instant connection to him. Like i could actually hear his emotions. Never happened that to me . Never ever. And i also felt like it was a safe ground to show the inside of the shell. It all came so naturally.

Well the guy is also a Cancer. Now i don't wonder why i felt like i took a tour of his emotions without even trying.

But ..oh well... here the little troubles started. He's been hurt before. Married and wife cheated on him..leading to divorce. 2 years ago, no kids. And since then he got back to his shell and kind of put a lock on it. In one of our conversations, after a glass of wine it kinda slipped out of my mouth that i could sense him and knew what is going on inside him. Aaaaand he pulled back in a really weird way. He lied to me about having someone else (not a relationship..more like an old attachment with benefits) because he knew i have something against cheating. Also mentioning that he likes me a lot and he got carried away by the fact that he likes me, but i am the type who deserves all or nothing in a relationship and feels he is not ready to offer me that, so he's more confortable in a friends with benefits relationship.(btw..that was a lie..i found out later he told me that just to push me away) I then told him i cannot be friends with a guy i like (and he was surprised i liked him) so... we should stop talking.
And there he was asking me: Do you think this is normal? Is this how you do things? We get along so well.. How the hell we go tomorrow without talking to each other? Are you nuts?

I am so damn confused. He said that but he's not the one initiating contact. If i ask.... "Do i bother you?" he says ..no way . If you'd bother me, i wouldn't answer the phone.

we had a meeting at my place few evenings ago. we cooked together, laughed, talked a bit about this.... in a calm and friendly matter and he told me he never met a woman like me that is as logical and affectionate in same time, and that he feels that there are 2 options. either i play hard on the outside and i am really that softy or i am just playing softy to play with him. Wanted to kiss me and then he pulled back. hugged me and then pushed me, but when i touched his shoulders he instantly relaxed.

Then he left... with that : "how the hell do you think we cannot talk starting tomorrow? "
talked on the phone 2 times since then, he always answers, always listens. after last night talk that i needed because i had a weird day, i told him that i felt selfish and next time , if he feels ok with it, i would be the listener and he said ok. We hung up... he went to bed and i sent him a Fb message wishing him a nice day and thanking him for being there for me.

So ...what is it with this... coming forward ( i really like you and i don't want to stop talking and seeing each other sometimes) but also not initiating contact and pulling back when he feels he's going forward?

Is this normal for Cancer guys who've been hurt before?