posted December 11, 2012 06:34 PM            

I think the current relationship will be long lasting but there are some dramas along the way with a couple of cooling off periods possibly.

The cards:

Five of cups
Five of swords
Eight of cups

I think he might have kids and you don't really want them in your home environment except for maybe twice a year say thanksgiving and maybe when you are away visiting your mother or something, so generally you won't be interested in getting to involved with his kids - perhaps.

I think this comes down to you only wanting to spend your time and money or have your things used only by you, and him, if he comes up to par. His kids just won't be worth it enough to you - maybe.

In fact he seems to have a lot of connections including family and friends and you are not too sure of who you want to freely think they have a ticket into your lives. I think you could benefit though from becoming more generous with yourself to share with others. He can be a bit too open but for the most part, his connections will improve your life if you let it. I think you could even spend a lot of time with his mother/elder sister. And his kids feel like nice kids for the most part. But quite alien to you, like he is, in their unstructured approach to things - there's just way too much freedom of action and choice with him and his family etc, and this is quite unsettling to you.

All up, an opportunity for growth, you would benefit from being more open to meeting and sharing time with others, he on the otherhand would be affected by becoming more introspective and attentive to some of the details of living/life management.

posted December 12, 2012 01:32 AM            

This man lives abroad and we can only meet quite infrequently, I hope for brief meetings every two or three months, at the very least. So far, we've only managed to meet twice in this last year. I am wondering whether the messages regarding family have a more psychological meaning because he doesn't have kids. His mother died when he was young and he only has brothers. In fact, he lives on his own whilst his close family are in another country. So, there won't be much opportunity for me to meet them. So, I wonder what could the cards be indicating where you've mentioned family. However, you are right that he likes his free, unstructured life (as far as I am concerned) which leaves me feeling very insecure.

Your advise towards the end "it seems you have to allow each other's personality and likings to infiltrate the other, so that it seems that you become more like he is now and he becomes more like you have been' really hits the spot. I know he has qualities which I need to develop for my personal growth. Its good to hear that I may also have qualities that would benefit him.

You are absolutely right in that a looser, less rigid relationship which gives him space, is likely to draw him closer to me. It has become apparent that the less clingy I am, the more I get to hear from him. So the play acting will be necessary.

Very heartening to know that the relationship will be long lasting. Thank you again.

posted December 12, 2012 02:29 AM            

And it feels like you are not sure if you want them in your personal space very much but that doesn't sound like it would be a problem at all.

There does seem cooler or cooling off periods but I still think it will be long lasting. I think he might feel that you are one of the few people that can ever really understand him.