Posts: 28
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posted November 14, 2014 11:49 AM            

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posted November 14, 2014 01:41 PM            

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she should do something to help other people. which field i think medicine or naturopathic/eastern medicine because western medicine is awful.

she could be a humanitarian in the medical field.

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posted November 14, 2014 02:51 PM            

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Your daughter has a very strong need to express herself, but sometimes that does not come so easily to her. Although she is mostly in touch with her feelings, getting all this to come out *right* can be a task that can frustrate her occasionally.
She might feel that confusion about her career aspirations all her life, as she feels more comfortable with "work"; quiet, undemanding, sometimes solitary, than she does with "career". It's the definitions of "career" that she might feel stifled by, and occasionally drained by; the public exposure, the 9-5 clock, the responsibility... This is not what she strives for. Creating beautiful things and making them last in the world, that's a part of her calling.

Stress at work could really drain her and impact her health if she over-reaches, so learning to have a healthy attitude toward career success is really important. If you or other family members are really pushing her to put a lot of energy in her career, maybe ease up a little bit. She has a very strong internal fear of failure that you might be feeding into, and additional pressure can make things much worse. Talking things out would help, in a relaxed, nice environment. Not the "we need to talk" thing, you know? A fun trip to a beautiful sweets shop, maybe, to talk about her career and skills over cake and tea. Something nice and quaint will relax her and make her think and communicate more clearly. She already knows what she feels drawn to the most, it's a matter of relaxing to feel confident enough to see her own skills and aspirations more clearly. I hope that helps a little bit!

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posted November 16, 2014 10:36 AM            

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thank you both so much!
she has talked about medical, but because she is so creative, and expressive, i think she has passed it off at times in the past, opting for other things that speak more to this artsy side of her. ill read this to her and, knowing her, she will likely consider it again, now that you have mentioned it. If not now, it may be one of those things that comes to her over time. She may come to realize that she can always be creative on the side....you never know.

Its funny, i'm always the one telling her to relax and not be in such a hurry, to not be so hard on herself; i remind her she has her whole life ahead of her, and she is amazing already. no pressure. whatever she does, i know she will do it well...she's already proven this. She blooms wherever she is planted with literally no prodding from us. She's a go getter, an initiator, and has guts like i never had as a child.
she is my firstborn. the rule follower, the one who never really needed more than a little nudge to make good, sound choices, keep her grades up, etc. in fact, i was the one always telling her to "Go to bed! it's late, Sweet thing! you need your rest" and she would just keep going, pushing herself to complete the task, and do it well.

But hey, I'm sure, somehow, because I'm the parent, i've played into this side of her--ugh-- Maybe it is simply that she wants to make me proud, even though she knows i am proud of her ALWAYS. she even repeats this to me. Gosh, who knows...all i can do is keep trying to instill peace and confidence in her heart, be there for her, etc.

Anyway, I am truly grateful that you all took the time to look at her chart and offer up words of wisdom. I will show her this today.

Thanks again!

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posted November 17, 2014 01:07 PM            

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It's great that you have a calm attitude there. As the big sister, she is shouldering a lot of responsibility, it's wonderful that you give her praise so easily. Maybe she feels overprotective over you in a way and wants to make your life easier also, so she pushes herself to succeed. You'll make her happiest if you show her you that you're happy as a person, also. This will give her some peace, as she learns so much from you, and still has not grown out of internalizing your patterns.

Have you ever had periods of anxiety and uncertainty in your own life when she was small? This might have affected her own ambitions more than you think.

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