posted July 10, 2015 04:33 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by peacefulclouds:
Interesting thread... you know, i never actually believed in 'energy vampires' before but let me tell you some info I got over the course of couple of years.

Recently, few professional readers have been telling me to start asking for donation when I read for people (they sensed it, that i do it for free). I asked why? Because i don't think i'm at that level yet, and they all said the same : if there is no exchange, you will drain yourself out. A good 'client', even if you read them for free, will exchange their energy by proper and sincere appreciation and acceptance, however most people are not good client: they will take and take regardless the condition of the reader, because that is human nature.

So, exchange (material or energy) is a must.

At first i thought lol, rubbish. But... then i realized it is true.

I don't get sick by doing readings in real life face to face for hours at all. But giving readings over email or online or forums (even online friends) actually often left me feeling very empty/drained and my health actually worsens! Even if the reading went smooth!

But i think that is the risk of free forum and cultural approach. in my countries, people respect readers a lot due to the mysticsm, the appreciation and open mind, but i do see in many other countries it is seen more as a 'service' more than a 'craft' or 'skill', because money.

When you are reduced down into that only, you start see readings as something to 'consume' rather than a guidance or spiritual enpowerment. That s where addictive behavior comes from..
Just my little observations

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Just comment on energy vampires - OMG ! Awful, the ex I am still trying to get rid of is a vampire and used to attack me psychicly. I had to learn how to protect myself I mean the energy they take just leaves you so drained and you end up with headaches. You find this with water signs more than other signs but psychic attack is usually air sign. Now, not always will you find too many using their gifts for bad but there are a few.

So, I offered a few readings the other day but I did done extras. However I could not do any more my energy was low and I have my own issues I need energy for. So I just try to help out where I can. I understand some can't read in return, I was there once myself and happy to help out now.

posted July 10, 2015 10:40 PM            

Most importantly, since this is largely a forum for practicing and learning, I think that (when asked) it's important to try to help and support the readers who are wanting to hone their skills...but I think there's also an opportunity to help the individuals getting the reading learn how to be better readees. As someone who can't exchange, the process is truly a mystical and amazing one for me. I have no idea what it is like to connect on behalf of someone else and try to deliver messages about sensitive issues in a stranger's life. I also don't really know what the boundaries are or what limits exist because I'm new to this and solely on the receiving end. Each time I read with someone I'm learning - not just through the messages they give me, but also about how to ask questions, which questions are positive ones and which are negative, how to let go, etc... It's a process, but especially in these past few months, it's been a blessing for me to be able to come to LL and learn a little bit more about it. I truly respect and an am grateful for all the wonderful readers who give their time and energy to help others on this forum. I would feel terrible if anyone felt as though I crossed a line or took too much during a reading. I sincerely apologize if that is the case with anyone.

I agree with what peacefulclouds said. I've had a few professional readings in the past and it's a much different experience than here online. It's easier to make a connection with the psychic in person because you can talk with him/her. It feels more like a conversation with a wise friend. These readings have been outstanding largely I think because of this candid connection - online that seems to get lost easily. It honestly does feel more like a "transaction" - I don't think it's cultural as much as it is directly related to the distancing effect of tying to connect over the internet. Maybe that's how the energy vampirism starts. Just me personally, I notice myself automatically holding off on giving information in readings because I either feel uncomfortable broadcasting my personal business where all can read or because I genuinely am not sure if any of that is necessary. Again, I'm still learning, but I now know it effects the exchange of energy.

I think it's important for those generous enough to give free readings to set boundaries...not only to protect themselves but also to educate others. I know it isn't always easy, but I think it's important to remember that we're all learning here. I imagine that when someone is seeking a reading they are usually not in the best frame of mind to begin with so they might not realize that they are being rude or destructive. Like intuitivefish said, maybe being rejected will help shake them out of their darkness and learn how to recognize their own power rather than trying to rely on a reader to give it to them.

posted July 11, 2015 07:13 AM            

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Originally posted by Springtimeflower:
Most everything that has changed in my life has taken a long time, so I've often met readers who will give me a good reading the first time and then fill it with baloney the next readings, so I will continue to help them. In other words I work hard for them and get nothing in return. It can work both ways.

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You seem to justify psychic addiction in your post, but maybe I am mistaken. Sure, you can be refused, but the purpose of this thread is to point out the danger and negativity of asking too many readings in the first place, for everyone involved. Everyone is supposed to do their part: those asking too many readings to stop, readers to refuse them. Something else happens: most people offering readings on this site, and true psychics in general, are above the average compassionate people with an interest in helping others. For them, it is difficult to refuse someone asking for help. This is a great challenge for compassionate people. The point is not to profit of this characteristic in the first place.

Discovering someone is a helpful compassionate person shouldn't lead to always asking more of that person, as much as one can get. At least on this forum we can try and do that.

If you expect to be refused when paying for readings, this happens rarely. I had paid orders with the same question, from people insisting for a different answer or a re-reading after a short period of time (although I always say, free or paid, "ask me again in 3 months") and I always refuse them. But let's be realistic, it's not the general rule. Plus, readers who have hundreds of clients can't even keep track of them.

I didn't get the part about you helping the reader, you meant paying them? It is unfortunate, but realistic that many professional readers will try to make you come back again and again. It is a common practice in this field. But the "baloney" you describe could also come from the fact that a good first reading gives you the answer. There isn't much to say about the matter for quite some time and coming back and asking about it will only give you "baloney" from the reader.

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I seem to have loved you in numberless forms...

AstroMandala

posted July 11, 2015 08:00 AM            

Discovering someone is a helpful compassionate person shouldn't lead to always asking more of that person, as much as one can get. At least on this forum we can try and do that.

posted July 11, 2015 08:13 AM            

sometimes I just want to say " darn I dont know!! " lol
but then I think, what if that were me feeling so confused?
when I first came here I only asked for reading but only later did I start to give back with readings.

the thing is, some ( including me ) see this as a calling in our life and as such its hard to turn your back and not help.
I actually find this a bigger calling in my life than the job I do day to day.

With some people on here yes I dont feel the connection so I dont go and give my insight, not because I am being mean but because I dont want to give a bad/false reading due to no connection or a lack of openness.

all this psychic "buisness" is not so easy to put rules in, its out of this world, its connected to magic, esoteria, spirits, what ever you view it as, well its ENERGY and energy binds us all, we are ALL connected to eachother weather you see it or not, energy links us, if anything as we all found this site!

posted July 11, 2015 04:14 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by LeeLoo2014:
You seem to justify psychic addiction in your post, but maybe I am mistaken. Sure, you can be refused, but the purpose of this thread is to point out the danger and negativity of asking too many readings in the first place, for everyone involved. Everyone is supposed to do their part: those asking too many readings to stop, readers to refuse them. Something else happens: most people offering readings on this site, and true psychics in general, are above the average compassionate people with an interest in helping others. For them, it is difficult to refuse someone asking for help. This is a great challenge for compassionate people. The point is not to profit of this characteristic in the first place.

Discovering someone is a helpful compassionate person shouldn't lead to always asking more of that person, as much as one can get. At least on this forum we can try and do that.

If you expect to be refused when paying for readings, this happens rarely. I had paid orders with the same question, from people insisting for a different answer or a re-reading after a short period of time (although I always say, free or paid, "ask me again in 3 months") and I always refuse them. But let's be realistic, it's not the general rule. Plus, readers who have hundreds of clients can't even keep track of them.

I didn't get the part about you helping the reader, you meant paying them? It is unfortunate, but realistic that many professional readers will try to make you come back again and again. It is a common practice in this field. But the "baloney" you describe could also come from the fact that a good first reading gives you the answer. There isn't much to say about the matter for quite some time and coming back and asking about it will only give you "baloney" from the reader.

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I think some of the people here point blank like to complain about what they feel is an injustice to themselves rather than taking a different approach to what they are doing. I put up a reading thread with limitations on it once. I'm sure people groaned and by some of the responses, like Astrokeen said, didn't read the instructions. "If you haven't had a reading in a month." Something to that effect. If I hadn't made some exceptions to the limitations, I would have had less than six people sign up. The reason some may not read the instructions, I observed, is that they want to get on the thread before someone else beats them out. They read it afterwards and if the person accepted them, then it must be okay.

In reference to the readings--that was one person in the not so recent past. What they told me three years ago--so far only one thing has happened, but I can see the rest coming up in the next few years. I spent two years helping them, though, and free on both sides with everything that crept up in their life to help them through their anxiety. Multiple earthquakes, etc. They were also going to other readers for help. When your life doesn't change a lot during a period of time (significant events), there isn't much to read for them, but giving someone a reading with no substance does no good. Why not say--there's nothing coming up for you. If they said that, then there wouldn't be anything to exchange.

For those you call as having a psychic addiction, what really happens is that things get better in their lives and they leave the readings behind until something else pops up again. I wrote something similar on a thread earlier (respecting the readers time and used LexusVirgo as an example) and it got very little interest from the people here. I know people feel good, too, if they get a lot of attention from the people here and attract many to their threads--kind of like facebook. It would be like someone saying they have 2000 friends and someone says well I have 4000 friends. Others don't need the attention and may not take issue with all the work/energy that is required either. Sometimes our ego needs can be to our detriment.

I think it's great when people can connect with guides, etc., but with that comes responsibility not only to themselves in knowing their limitations, but also to others in how they help people.

The real reason I believe people here get multiple reads at times is because of the accuracy and knowing that many here are just practicing as well as some having off days. I've seen some responses here from readers and they will acknowledge that they are not feeling well and decline to read, but I don't think that has been the case with everyone.

For example, if you have a Neptune transit affecting your 7th house or partnership planets, you may not see a person for who they are, so if someone tries to tell you they are a bum, you may try to find someone else to agree with you. Neptune by the way rules drugs, rose colored glasses, idealism, illusion, etc.

There was a heated debate here on LL once a while back about how people were talking to each other on reading threads, which left some hard feelings.

As people find their way and drop off, hopefully the ones that follow them will be the way you want them to be.

posted July 11, 2015 08:35 PM            

Finding balance is key

Sometimes I wonder if some forget about free will. I have no qualms about people asking a lot of questions, but when one asks the same question over and over again, it boggles my mind because either they 1) don't want to accept reality, or 2) are waiting for that one reader to tell them what they want to hear. If you want to ask again about a topic, I am a firm believer you need to wait at least a week on the same question and consider asking someone else. I agree that posters are looking for comfort, but at the same time you prevent personal growth by not addressing the issues within.

I agree with LeeLoo about the obsession aspect, give things time to work out and trust in the universe, even if things do not turn out the way you like- it happens for a reason.

Offering those who haven't asked in a while

This is a cool concept, and I am fine with it if someone prefers to do it. This can prevent some posters from asking the same question over and over again, and also helps the newer posters feel comfortable. I think people who are newer to this site feel intimidated when seeing those of us who know each other exchange a lot, and this can help to make them feel more welcome. Especially those who cannot exchange in return, I imagine it would be a little daunting to ask someone when they enter a topic called an 'exchange' thread, so I always encourage readers to take on those who cannot exchange in return.

Proper reading etiquette-not every one respects it

I don't have a problem with people asking multiple questions, because as the reader you can tell them no. If you don't say no and remain frustrated, then you aren't helping yourself out. I will not complain about this because if it really bothered me, I would say no. It is okay to turn down posters if you feel overwhelmed, no one is going to judge you for it. However, this needs to be communicated to the question asker so they realize your concerns.

It is totally okay to decline if you aren't up to it, remember as the reader you have to take care of yourself as well. Even if you need a few days to get back to the poster, it is totally fine.

What I cannot stand are the 'this can't be right, read again' attitudes. We are all here to learn and no one is going to be 100% perfect. I've seen on a few occasions posters getting haughty and self-righteous over the fact the reader didn't give them the one answer they secretly wanted. Be grateful for the reading and offer constructive criticism, not how the reader is 'wrong' and demand more from them.

Not saying thank you as erickaf pointed out- always be thankful and grateful to the posters. I always make a point to thank anyone who reads for me, and I think that should be the standard. Reading takes a lot of time and energy on the reader's side, so it is no small task to help someone out.

Negative energy, it is here and should be avoided

This forum is primarily positive, but sadly does not avoid the occasional negative energy that comes in. I really detest readers and posters that are demanding. One example is the 'exchanges for one hour' thread. I am 100% against those, because it is suggesting that your questions are so important and must be answered in one hour only. The only time I think you should put a time limit on a reading is if is related to an emergency, otherwise it comes off as elitist. I've seen a few posters berate others for not getting back right away, which is wrong.

This is a free site where people donate their time, and that should be respected. I may not always get back to people right away but I never forget someone's request and always give my best effort. This is something that all readers should be given respect for, not berated because I didn't answer your repetitive question in under an hour.

Asking several follow up questions is something I don't prefer either. These take a lot of time and effort and sometimes more than the original question. Limiting the follow-up to 1-2 is good to continue the dialogue but not take advantage of the reader. Otherwise, you might as well make a new thread because essentially you are asking the reader for another reading.

posted July 12, 2015 03:46 AM            

For example questions that begin with "should I?". I have asked this type this in the past myself but the reader had said only i know the answer to what i should and shouldnt do. And they are right, probably what i should have asked is "what is likely to happen if i do xyz".

I think it is not a good idea to ask a reader a question like that because you are asking the reader to make your choices for you. What happens if things go wrong? Is the reader going to take the blame? I think it is unfair on both the reader and the querent. These gifts are there to help people. But i dont think we would help ourselves by asking someone else to make decisions for us.

posted July 12, 2015 06:28 AM            

You're definitely right about - 'Proper reading etiquette'

posted July 12, 2015 08:34 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by ikja:
Bella,

You're definitely right about - 'Proper reading etiquette'

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I seem to have loved you in numberless forms...

AstroMandala

posted July 17, 2015 03:37 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Astro keen:
I don't think this thread has had much effect on some people who never seem to miss an offer for a free reading. I wonder how they do it! They must be obsessively wired into the Person Readings page, clicking to refresh it every few minutes, in order to home into new offers.

It is tiring to watch.

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Agreed.

posted July 17, 2015 04:06 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Astro keen:
I don't think this thread has had much effect on some people who never seem to miss an offer for a free reading. I wonder how they do it! They must be obsessively wired into the Person Readings page, clicking to refresh it every few minutes, in order to home into new offers.

It is tiring to watch.

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posted July 17, 2015 04:28 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by erickaf:
That is easy for you to say furrybunny...you are a non reader.

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So is this forum now reader versus non reader? Honestly no point being an elitist about it...

posted July 17, 2015 04:31 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by furrybunny:
So is this forum now reader versus non reader? Honestly no point being an elitist about it...

it shouldn't matter if I'm a reader or being read for. Fact is if u have a problem with a person u should address them yourself instead of tiptoeing. It applies to real life as well not just this forum.

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posted July 17, 2015 04:34 PM            

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Originally posted by furrybunny:
Lols I think ur being catty at this point. Try this! Instead of being passive aggressive why don't you try pointing it out to them addressing them one by one. You seem to have enough time to browse threads. No point moping around

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