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Author
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Topic: Was this guy upset that I didn't post on his FB page?
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threepoolsoflight
Knowflake Posts: 64
From:
Registered: Apr 2013
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posted February 25, 2016 11:50 PM
  
Ok, so this is a weird situation. "J" is someone that my boyfriend and I know through a sport we participate in, and he's not quite a friend but more than an acquaintance. He's unhappy in his marriage, and I've had my own frustrations with my bf. I like him but can see how his personality might result in his unhappiness in relationships, and to complicate things, I've been intermittently attracted to him. When I'm attracted, it turns sort of pluto/obsessive, so I've had to go cold turkey on thinking about him and checking his fb page in the past. But I also feel like I could help him, and it brings me down when he's upset (our synastry has exact chiron double whammies....fun!). My bf suspected that he was attracted to me several months ago, which I have yet to be convinced of, and now becomes jealous when I talk to him. Ever since then, J seems very uncomfortable talking to me even when not in the presence of my bf. But, once in awhile we'll have a good conversation, or he'll send me a text, and then he later elaborates on things we spoke about about in an indirect way on his facebook page. At first I thought I was seeing connections where none existed, but it happened so many times that it couldn't be coincidental. So about a week ago I had an unusually fun time with him and a couple other people. The next day he referred to me by name directly on his fb page and sort of asked me a question. I freaked out because my first instinct was to friend him so that I could reply, but then I became worried that he would think I'm more interested in him than I am, and that it wouldn't be good for my relationship, so I didn't do anything. Still, I was torn because I thought it might make him look bad if he referred to me and I didn't answer back, and some other people I know post on his page all the time. Honestly, I have no idea about fb etiquette being nerdy, old (in my early 40s) and mostly friendless lol! A couple days ago I saw him again and he seemed to be in a bad mood. I went out of my way to say hi to him, but he seemed frustrated and left soon afterwards...so my question is (finally, after my novel), was he upset that I didn't come out of the woodwork and post on his fb page? It seems really trivial to me, but I have no idea...he seems to put a lot of effort into his posts. And I guess a larger second question is whether sustaining a friendship with this guy would just cause more problems in the end?Please leave a question or two and I will be happy to read for you tomorrow morning (in 8 hrs...gotta go to bed!). You guys have been so great giving me insight into my dilemmas in the past, I'm very grateful for your help!! IP: Logged |
NYCdodger
Knowflake Posts: 1719
From:
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted February 26, 2016 10:04 AM
The Lovers
5 of wands
8 of swordsFinalized by Strength Those cards give a straightforward answer.. He wants more from you but can't have it (Lovers and 5 of wands). He wants your attention. 8 of swords is telling him its a dead situation (or its telling you this). He's trying to hold his frustration back and act like nothings wrong (strength) My advice is if you're already in a relationship (especially being that your bf knows him) isn't it kind of obvious that you should distance yourself from this person? Things we try to make cordial can lead to complications when not put in check. Seems like you should distance yourself from him for good. I can already see this getting ugly. His feelings aren't your priority. Hope I've helped  IP: Logged |
threepoolsoflight
Knowflake Posts: 64
From:
Registered: Apr 2013
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posted February 26, 2016 09:44 PM
Hi NYC-
Thanks for your reading and insights. Yeah, I guess I needed to hear that, especially that J's feelings shouldn't be my priority. Maybe this situation is really highlighting my on-going frustration with my bf and how I need to make a decision about him (I already told him I didn't want to marry him, and yet years later, here we are, still together). Last night as I was taking a shower, he sat on the toilet and told me 5 things I was doing wrong...like, what man does *that*?! Saturn personified lolPlease leave a question, and I do thank you again for your time! IP: Logged |
Randall
Webmaster Posts: 62790
From: Saturn next to Charmaine
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted February 28, 2016 04:56 PM
People do the strangest things.IP: Logged |
NYCdodger
Knowflake Posts: 1719
From:
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted February 29, 2016 08:35 AM
quote:
Originally posted by threepoolsoflight:
Hi NYC-
Thanks for your reading and insights. Yeah, I guess I needed to hear that, especially that J's feelings shouldn't be my priority. Maybe this situation is really highlighting my on-going frustration with my bf and how I need to make a decision about him (I already told him I didn't want to marry him, and yet years later, here we are, still together). Last night as I was taking a shower, he sat on the toilet and told me 5 things I was doing wrong...like, what man does *that*?! Saturn personified lolPlease leave a question, and I do thank you again for your time!
No prob! Yeah these things can get complicated. My question is: "What was CH's perception of me during our conflict in the library"? IN other words, what did he see me as... Wanted to know if I was in right standing during a conflict that occurred a while ago. Who was right, who was wrong...etc... IP: Logged |
threepoolsoflight
Knowflake Posts: 64
From:
Registered: Apr 2013
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posted March 01, 2016 08:09 AM
Hi NYCd, I will be back tonight with your reading. Thanks and sorry for the slight delay!IP: Logged |
NYCdodger
Knowflake Posts: 1719
From:
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted March 01, 2016 08:11 AM
Ok. ThanksIP: Logged |
threepoolsoflight
Knowflake Posts: 64
From:
Registered: Apr 2013
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posted March 01, 2016 10:37 PM
Here is what came up for CH's perception of you during the conflict in library:How CH sees themselves: Lovers
How CH sees you: 2 of wands
How CH feels about you: Q Swords rx
How you see CH: star rx
What you feel towards CH: 10 pents rx
Challenge of the relationship: 5 pents CH thought of themselves as being a good friend to you, and saw you as being insensitive and "defending your territory" so to speak. Maybe you spoke some harsh words towards this person? Meanwhile, you feel like CH dashed your hopes in some way. 10 pents and 5 of pents suggest the loss of something substantial (metaphorical like a solid friendship or something material like money/belongings) Perhaps bad decisions were made under the influence of addictive behavior (on CH's part, most likely, not yours) Was CH right? wheel of fortune rx: CH was suffering through some external influence or bad luck. Perhaps they could have helped themselves but they couldn't quite get it together Was NYCd right? 10 of swords: you were being too harsh?? You may have spoken elements of the truth but your delivery was devastating to CH.
Is this CH person really sensitive? Hope this resonates and isn't totally off!! IP: Logged |
NYCdodger
Knowflake Posts: 1719
From:
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted March 02, 2016 11:30 AM
Its weird. I'm not sure who is who but i guess there was a lot of misunderstandings that took something above and beyond. I wanted to communicate with him to see where we can resolve this issue. But then he "threatened" to punch me in the face. I said "Ok, do what you want". But the next day he didn't do anything, he actually tried to give me a handshake. After a while things just got weird with that person and we just stopped talking altogether. I DO see him as someone is who unnecessarily sensitive though..IP: Logged |
threepoolsoflight
Knowflake Posts: 64
From:
Registered: Apr 2013
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posted March 02, 2016 08:32 PM
Strange. Maybe all those pents reversed are showing some mental unbalance and ungroundedness like manic depression....IP: Logged |
NYCdodger
Knowflake Posts: 1719
From:
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted March 03, 2016 01:53 PM
quote:
Originally posted by threepoolsoflight:
Strange. Maybe all those pents reversed are showing some mental unbalance and ungroundedness like manic depression....
Very possible..He always came off as someone with an inferiority complex. I kinda "saw" it from the first time I met him.. IP: Logged |
Lindaland
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