posted June 13, 2017 06:14 PM            

Before I was introduced to psychics, I was a VERY good money saver. I always had money available to me no matter what. My only problem that I had was buying too many books, lol, but other than that I saved my money. Now, I'm struggling to live properly and can only manage to pay my bills and that's it, nothing else. I'm very disappointed in myself and I'm confusing myself when it comes to my situation between J and I. Deep down, I feel that things will get better eventually and he and I will get back together, but then my fears/doubts creep in and I start to think that it might not actually happen.

Because J and I work together, I see him almost everyday. So, I don't have problems with contact or anything like that and sometimes we do still hang out, but when I get conflicting readings with different timeframes, it messes with my head. Similar to how confused I am right now.

I'm currently doing the "no contact" rule and I haven't text him since last week (which btw was an awful week between us, but things are much better now). I'm doing it for myself (because he doesn't text as much anymore) and because Psychics keeps telling me not to reach out to him. I'm actually trying to follow advice this time since I never really have in the past.

I know this post is all over the place, but that's how my mind is right now. I truly want to stop relying on paid psychic readings, save my money and follow my intuition, but when it comes to my own situations concerning J, there is fear and doubt, which disables me from distinguishing if my intuition is correct or not.

I do try to do other things to stop me from getting readings, but whenever my mind lingers on him and it's a very heavy thought that I can't ignore, that's when I turn to psychics, especially if my mood isn't the best.

I remember when I first joined this website back in 2014, someone told me that getting readings is a addiction and the $40 that I had spent during that time will eventually build up and I'll spend a ton more over the course of the time. I told that member that I'd never let it get that bad, but here I am nearly 3 years later, and I've spent so much money it's ridiculous. I could have put a down payment on a car or something for the amount that has gone down the drain.

Can my addiction to psychics be some form of bad energy? I know that sounds super crazy, but I can't explain why I'm so addicted to this and I absolutely HAVE to know when something is going to happen due to being impatient and not having faith.

And concerning J, I've been told we aren't getting back together, then I've been told that we are. I've been told it's going to happen this month, now I'm being told by others that it's going to take months. I've been so impatient these past almost 4 months, I've driven myself crazy. When J and I are having a good time together, I don't worry about the psychics or getting a reading. But when I get in my depressive states, that's when I bother him about wanting to get back together, stressing not only myself out, but him as well. And when I'm hurting, he told me that it hurts him as well. Then I turn to psychics about it. I feel like I'm constantly going in a circle and today talking to Psychic Jane and Rebecca (who I always say I won't talk to anymore) really threw me off, considering my go-to readers all told me it was happening this month, in comparison to Jane and Rebecca who said it's going to take months. I spent $69 in total today and I feel so stupid for even throwing my money out the window like that, especially considering how much I'm struggling with other things in my personal life.

Now it could very well take months, or maybe it won't, my point is that I'm tired of doing this to myself and needed some type of guidance. I feel so lost and confused right now...

posted June 14, 2017 11:17 AM            

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Originally posted by Randall:
Bump!

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posted June 14, 2017 12:26 PM            

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Originally posted by libentia:
It could be that you have an addictive personality, by that I mean it's easy for you to get addicted to something to the point it gets out of hand. I'm like that, I was like you, too. I didn't talk to a lot of psychics, but I did spend a lot of money on the ones I did talk to. I'm not speaking from a psychic or card reading or any other intuitive type standpoint, but from personal experience. When it comes to breaking a quasi-addiction (for myself at least), I use a sort of rewarding system, i.e. "If I can go x amount of time without doing that thing, then I'll reward myself with this." The reward doesn't have to be something you spend money on. I know it's easier said than done, but try to find things to take your mind off something. You said you're a writer, maybe do some burst writing of short stories. Watch a movie, go hang out with friends, put your phone on silent mode, listen to some music, try something new that can be time consuming (but not enough to hinder important things like work or school). Before you know it, time will pass, your mind may even be elsewhere. And something you always need to remember is that if it will happen, it will happen. Psychics and the cards can only see so much, and they don't mention free will for nothing. There's nothing good from stressing yourself out about it.

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Thank you so much for responding to this! To be honest, I agree with you. There is a high possibility that I have an addictive personality when it comes to psychics, also maybe other things when I think about my past (addictions to certain social media websites; Facebook, Tumblr etc). Writing can be very helpful for me, but sometimes I get distracted (I have ADD) which in turn makes me stop writing. I haven't worked on my novel in a couple of weeks now because of my depression, things with J and my financial situation. It got to the point that I couldn't even get myself to clean my apartment, lol. I'm going to try to work on my novel today. Music does help out a lot to.

I want to try to go 60 days without getting a reading. It would be a stepping stone for me if I can't do that on my own, because during the entire time I was in a relationship with J, I only went to get a reading 2x I think and it didn't have anything to do with him.

posted June 14, 2017 12:38 PM            

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Originally posted by ProxyxBlue:
Thank you so much for responding to this! To be honest, I agree with you. There is a high possibility that I have an addictive personality when it comes to psychics, also maybe other things when I think about my past (addictions to certain social media websites; Facebook, Tumblr etc). Writing can be very helpful for me, but sometimes I get distracted (I have ADD) which in turn makes me stop writing. I haven't worked on my novel in a couple of weeks now because of my depression, things with J and my financial situation. It got to the point that I couldn't even get myself to clean my apartment, lol. I'm going to try to work on my novel today. Music does help out a lot to.

I want to try to go 60 days without getting a reading. It would be a stepping stone for me if I can't do that on my own, because during the entire time I was in a relationship with J, I only went to get a reading 2x I think and it didn't have anything to do with him.

Rewarding myself is a good idea. It does sound easier said than done to me at this moment, but with effort, I know that I'll make it through.

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posted June 14, 2017 02:37 PM            

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Originally posted by libentia:
I'm like that, too. I suffer from depression as well and can be very paranoid. I get distracted easily, as well. This might sound weird, but the cleaning thing stood out to me, you should definitely find it in you to do it. Whenever i'm sad or upset, or I can't seem to think, no matter how much I don't want to do it, I get up and clean my room. I reorganize everything, I get rid of clutter. I always feel so much better, and I deliberately take a long time to do it because it keeps me preoccupied!

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Really? Sounds like we have a lot in common! Sorry, I missed this earlier and didn't realize you had responded back to me. I was using my phone to reply back since I was at work at the time.

But yeah, I suffer from depression, anxiety disorder and ADD. That is a helpful tip! I'll need to apply it to stuff I should do whenever I'm feeling that way. Plus, like you said, it can help keep me preoccupied I also sometimes watch various series on Netflix to distract my mind.

Also, I can be paranoid too when it clocks down to my anxiety lol.

Once I blocked Bitwine from myself on my laptop, but didn't block it completely, meaning that I didn't block it on my incognito window and would just go through there to go on Bitwine. I've even deleted accounts but eventually make a new one. It was bad

posted June 14, 2017 06:29 PM            

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Originally posted by Vivi327:
Psychic addiction also stems for the need to be in control of everything. Let go of the need to control the future, the only thing we can control is how we act today. Prayer helps, also i recommend seeking therapy because sometimes, even though it's harmful, psychics can be like therapists, why not spend your money on someone that will help you get to the root of the problem?

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You have a very good point there. I've never spoken to anyone (besides my ex/best friend and my cousin) about me seeing psychics. I wouldn't feel comfortable telling a stranger in person about it, but I have spoken to a psychotherapist, which was when I discovered I had ADD and anxiety disorder. However, I haven't been back for personal reasons.